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July 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, me and my boyfriend decided to have some fun in my room before my parents got home. My phone started vibrating half-way through, and when I saw my mom's picture, I reflexively answered. It wasn't a phone call. It was a face time. Busted. FML

#21208909
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26852) - you deserved it (42568)

On 07/14/2014 at 1:45pm - intimacy - by Ob3nie - United States (California)

Today, my husband thought it would be romantic to pick me up and fall on the bed with me while we were kissing. Our faces smashed together as we hit the bed, and my tongue is still bleeding on and off. FML

#21224768
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26633) - you deserved it (2755)

On 07/30/2014 at 1:04pm - intimacy - by WasntWorthIt - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I accidentally farted in the middle of class. Thinking I got away with it, I just kept doing my work until some kid across the room says, "I could have done better." FML

#21224311
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26150) - you deserved it (4464)

On 07/29/2014 at 11:49pm - work - by dealtit - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was at the gym, when I saw my uncle at the front desk. I quietly went up behind him and slapped him hard on the back while yelling "What's up, loser?!" He turned around. It wasn't my uncle. FML

#21198479
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25197) - you deserved it (38454)

On 07/04/2014 at 1:35pm - misc - by Oops - United States

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, I was scrubbing the bloody aftermath of a successful mouse trap off of my stove with an old toothbrush. After a few good scrubs, out of habit I put the toothbrush in my mouth while I turned on the water. FML

Today, I complained to the train company online. I filled in information and added several photos as evidence. I only realised later that the photos I attached were nudes. FML

#21202786
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23137) - you deserved it (54013)

On 07/08/2014 at 12:29pm - intimacy - by anona (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I was stuck in heavy traffic. Bored, I looked to my left and noticed someone who seemed to be asleep at the wheel. After staring for a bit, wondering how people can be so negligent, I ended up hitting the car in front of me. FML

Today, I went to my weekly AA meeting. It was a huge crowd and I was the guest speaker. Not 5 minutes into my speech, I was booed off stage and banned from further attendance because I accidentally wore a Jack Daniel's shirt. FML

#21217633
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20380) - you deserved it (47642)

On 07/22/2014 at 7:20pm - health - by dypshyyt - United States (Florida)

Today, a new session started for my swimming squad. I walked down to the pool, tripped over a stray equipment bag, and belly-flopped into the pool in front of everyone, fully clothed. I'm the coach. FML

#21225439
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19793) - you deserved it (2214)

On 07/31/2014 at 1:00am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my father tripped over the dog and hit a wall. He was so convinced his arm was broken that we waited for 3 hours in emergency to find out he had a bruise. FML

#21225316
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18395) - you deserved it (1530)

On 07/30/2014 at 11:12pm - misc - by anon - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got into trouble at work because a customer complained about my face tattoo, I don't have a face tattoo but I do have one behind my ear. Nonetheless, I still got written up and had to cover it with a band-aid, which ripped out hair when I took it off. FML

#21225337
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18325) - you deserved it (5342)

On 07/30/2014 at 11:28pm - work - by heatherfeather22 - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was having coffee with an old friend I hadn't seen since university. I asked about her husband; she replied, "he died" and walked away. I was confused, so I stood up and took off after her. She reminded me I was at the funeral, and then slapped me in the face. FML

#21223464
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17254) - you deserved it (51072)

On 07/29/2014 at 3:58am - misc - by jayswizzle89 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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Tuesday 22 July 2014

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