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April 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while cleaning my desk I found a stray gumball. I quickly popped it into my mouth only to discover with horror that it was a paintball. FML

#21394264
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14088) - you deserved it (28044)

On 04/15/2015 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I thought I had gotten away with throwing a party while my folks were gone the night before. They came home and I was as sweet as possible. I could tell they were not buying it, but I thought I was in the clear. Later, they told me I had drunk-dialled them and spilled the beans. FML

#21386294
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13448) - you deserved it (26565)

On 04/02/2015 at 12:40am - misc - by banana12321 - United States (California)

Today, I went to the dentist for the first time in years. His first comment upon inspecting my teeth: "Meth. Hell of a drug." FML

#21395729
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8245) - you deserved it (2929)

On 04/18/2015 at 12:45pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went on a date with a girl I like. Afterwards, I drove her home, and we just sat there awkwardly. I thought she wanted to kiss me but was nervous, so I jokingly said "What're you waiting for? Christmas?" I guess she took that as a "Get the hell out", because she broke into tears and left. FML

#21395685
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7759) - you deserved it (7453)

On 04/18/2015 at 10:38am - love - by fuck (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that the only reason my parents have been letting me hang out with my friends so late is so they can search my room for drugs. FML

#21395867
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (2096) - you deserved it (200)

On 04/18/2015 at 7:55pm - misc - by Armstrong (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered why my pet bird has been hiding behind my couch pillow lately. It's not because she was nesting, as I thought. She's been secretly tearing apart the whole couch from behind there instead. FML

#21395798
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1904) - you deserved it (281)

On 04/18/2015 at 3:34pm - animals - by thisisnotavirustrustme.exe (woman) - United States (New York)



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