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October 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend tried to rid me of my hiccups. As he'd screamed at me and I'd pissed my pants, I just burst into tears. FML

#21279967
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26953) - you deserved it (3217)

On 10/17/2014 at 4:12pm - health - by catt - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML

#21279992
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26815) - you deserved it (2951)

On 10/17/2014 at 6:30pm - kids - by KayyElOh94 - United States

Today, as I was about to leave home for my first sweet taste of freedom at my new apartment, my car died. I'm stuck here for at least the weekend and can look forward to my mom driving me to work. Freedom. FML

#21274254
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26638) - you deserved it (2386)

On 10/09/2014 at 1:53pm - misc - by gonesofast - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the kids on my cross country team were planning a big surprise party for one of the girls, whose birthday is in a few weeks. It's my birthday today. FML

#21281118
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26512) - you deserved it (1899)

On 10/19/2014 at 2:19pm - misc - by forgotten (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that I am "un-promotable" to the job that I have been promised for the last two years because, I "don't suffer idiots well." Idiots. FML

Today, I showed up to work and my boss was nowhere to be found. A phone call later, I find out he's in Dubai. Oh, and since I'm his personal assistant, I should be able to take care of matters until he gets back. I've only been his assistant for a week. FML

#21281510
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26264) - you deserved it (1900)

On 10/20/2014 at 12:53am - work - by are you kidding me - United States (Kansas)

Today, I caught my 15-year-old son trying to roll catnip into a joint and smoke it. FML

#21281464
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25990) - you deserved it (3367)

On 10/19/2014 at 11:48pm - kids - by Bad Dad - United States (Colorado)

Today, I laughed at my grandma's chihuahua poodle mix, as it barked at me entering the house. "What are you going to do, nibble me to death?" is apparently enough to make it jump and bite me. I needed five stitches. FML

#21280619
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25434) - you deserved it (9917)

On 10/18/2014 at 7:05pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my 7-year-old used the word "crap". When I told her that she mustn't use that word because it's rude, she simply replied, "Mother, you should hear the words I use at school." FML

#21281207
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25358) - you deserved it (3994)

On 10/19/2014 at 4:58pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my annoying colleague gasped, wrapped her arms around herself, started sweating and curled up in a ball crying, "No, no, no" in front of several customers. They accused me of 'setting her off', when I blurted out, "Sorry, she gets panic attacks". All I did was say the word 'abortion'. FML

#21281594
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25150) - you deserved it (4497)

On 10/20/2014 at 4:31am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, after months of job hunting, I started a new job in a deli. I've been a vegetarian since I was 13, but it was the only job I could find. Turns out, I'm allergic to the preservatives they use, as my fingers now resemble sausages. Guess it's time to start job hunting again. FML

Today, I was leading a tour of my university and saw a girl in ripped jeans and combat boots smoking a cigarette. I told her that she shouldn't be representing the school in such a manner. She shot back: "I'm a Presidential Scholar. Suck my dick, bitch." FML

#21278356
310 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24734) - you deserved it (49263)

On 10/15/2014 at 1:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML

#21281163
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24406) - you deserved it (6239)

On 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by Deadpool434 (man) - Ireland (Dublin)



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Friday 17 October 2014

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