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January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend gave me lingerie from Victoria's Secret. He then added that his mother picked it out. FML

#20459473
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30432) - you deserved it (3161)

On 01/14/2013 at 7:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, after months of searching and several emotional breakdowns, I finally found a new job. My wife's words of encouragement? "Try not to fuck this one up." FML

#20464089
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30424) - you deserved it (9114)

On 01/17/2013 at 5:43am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I finally got to conduct my first questioning of a suspect, who had been arrested in connection with a car theft. As I recited the Miranda warning to him, my mind went totally blank, and after a few seconds, he sarcastically continued the speech for me. FML

#20464395
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30394) - you deserved it (14562)

On 01/17/2013 at 12:15pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, someone put a whole packet of glitter on the blades of my ceiling fan. Too bad I only noticed when I turned it on. FML

#20482822
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30286) - you deserved it (3757)

On 01/28/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by hopelessteej (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, due to technical problems, I had to call the company's IT-support as my computer went totally haywire. I explained via phone that I couldn't access anything. The support then tried contacting me by e-mail and got upset with me when I didn't answer. FML

#20463766
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30283) - you deserved it (2198)

On 01/17/2013 at 12:03am - work - by Beva (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, I was suffering from an asthma attack, so I grabbed my inhaler and took a puff. This was probably very disturbing for the earwig which had somehow made my puffer its home, as I discovered when it shot into my mouth. FML

#20477568
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30265) - you deserved it (2468)

On 01/25/2013 at 1:30am - health - by asthmattack (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, someone sent my boss a CD full of documents for an upcoming trial. It's my job to sort through the evidence, so he gave it to me. I looked on the CD. There's only one file; a 1020-page PDF of all the documents we need, and the pages weren't scanned in order. FML

#20441300
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30200) - you deserved it (2201)

On 01/03/2013 at 6:36pm - work - by fucked five ways to friday (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my dad was making drinks for my mom and himself, so I asked him to make me some coffee too. When he brought me my drink, I took a sip, and realized he'd poured salt in it. As I gagged, he muttered, "Next time, make it yourself." FML

#20469761
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30156) - you deserved it (7514)

On 01/20/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by megean c.l. (woman) - United States

Today, I was cleaning at work when an elderly gentleman walked towards me, paused, and with a wink said, "That's what I like to see: a girl on her knees." This is the same workplace where another old man informed me that my yellow uniform made me look like a "suggestive cheesecake." FML

#20472773
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30147) - you deserved it (2622)

On 01/22/2013 at 6:14am - work - by Job Seeking (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML

#20480710
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30079) - you deserved it (3470)

On 01/27/2013 at 1:03am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I realised in the middle of my shift how useless my deodorant is in the stifling heatwave spreading through my country. It's no longer effective against my awful B.O., which is a problem because I'm a mascot, and my costume traps the smell inside like a portable toilet. FML

#20469816
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30004) - you deserved it (4655)

On 01/20/2013 at 5:13pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I woke up following one of the worst nightmares of my life. I was sweating, clutching the sheets, and feeling sick to the stomach. I'd been dreaming of my wedding that's taking place next week. FML

#20468290
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29972) - you deserved it (6522)

On 01/19/2013 at 6:35pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, after getting into an argument with my dad, he told me that I would make a great ex wife one day. FML

#20467602
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29962) - you deserved it (6745)

On 01/19/2013 at 8:51am - love - by Claire - United States (Maryland)



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