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December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, when my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I got a nose bleed. He gave me a shirt to plug it with and kept going. FML

#20195821
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27162) - you deserved it (4982)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:33am - intimacy - by anon - United States

Today, my son got suspended from school. He's in kindergarten. FML

#20201910
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27145) - you deserved it (6722)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:32pm - kids - by Renzy (woman) -

Today, I woke up from an explicit dream involving my dentist. I'm scheduled for a conscious sedation appointment with him in two hours and I'm terrified of what I might say or do while I'm under. FML

#20423262
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27104) - you deserved it (2932)

On 12/26/2012 at 9:05am - health - by ugh - United States (Ohio)

Today, at the gas station, the automatic door didn't open when I approached it. I asked the cashier to open it for me, joking that because I'm a redhead, I didn't have a soul and it wouldn't open for me. The cashier freaked and wouldn't let me go until I proved I had a soul. FML

#20199980
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27030) - you deserved it (5328)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Devil (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was texting my mother after my boyfriend broke off our relationship. She offered incredibly supportive replies such as "No, really?" and "Aww, that sucks." before apparently getting bored and claiming she had to go because her "text reception" was breaking up. FML

#20426386
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26767) - you deserved it (4474)

On 12/27/2012 at 6:20pm - love - by youfuckingdumbassmum (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, while I was removing my makeup with my boyfriend watching, he mentioned that he used to think girls were prettier without makeup on, but he'd now changed his mind. FML

#20187008
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26708) - you deserved it (2961)

On 12/01/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by allbrokeup (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I ran into my infant daughter's room because I thought I heard her crying, and found she was still sound asleep in her crib. The screams were coming from the mouse our cat was using to paint her bedroom walls. FML

#20400604
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26669) - you deserved it (2025)

On 12/15/2012 at 10:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my friend spilt orange juice all over my iPad. She then went ahead to clean it off by rinsing it with water. FML

#20187648
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26646) - you deserved it (2594)

On 12/02/2012 at 5:16am - misc - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally knocked over a mall Santa on his way to meet some children. I've never had that many hate-filled eyes on me at once. FML

#20404919
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26561) - you deserved it (5738)

On 12/18/2012 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I noticed my wife put a bumper sticker on our car that says "Cowboy butts drive me nuts." I've driven that car to work every day. FML

#20405855
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26482) - you deserved it (3681)

On 12/18/2012 at 4:44pm - misc - by idontevenlikebuttsthatmuch - United States (Arizona)

Today, it was my first day at my new job at a nursing home. Not only were we short staffed, two residents passed away, and I got beaten up by an old man. FML

#20401181
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26313) - you deserved it (2319)

On 12/15/2012 at 7:46pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, due to bad weather, my dad let me take his car to drive to my apartment 3 hours away. I only realized when I got there that my keys were still sitting on my parents' kitchen counter. FML

#20412922
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26306) - you deserved it (10310)

On 12/22/2012 at 1:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I was getting intimate with my current bootycall when he thought it would be funny to make animal sounds. He "baa-ed" "moo-ed" and "gobbled" until losing his erection from intense laughter, leaving me there very confused and unsatisfied. FML

#20198007
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26304) - you deserved it (9245)

On 12/09/2012 at 5:46pm - intimacy - by Bug5992 (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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