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December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was at church, when my mom's phone went off during the sermon. As if that wasn't humiliating enough for me, her ring tone was set to the Bed Intruder song. FML

#20430388
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27547) - you deserved it (3717)

On 12/29/2012 at 5:33pm - misc - by killme (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, "The Phantom of the Opera" soundtrack blasted me awake at 4 am. Not knowing how it got on my iPod, I checked and found I had bought the whole $17.00 album in my sleep. This is the second time this month; the first time I downloaded the soundtrack from "The Wizard of Oz". FML

#20198547
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27446) - you deserved it (6171)

On 12/10/2012 at 12:10am - money - by hailey - United States (Maryland)

Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML

#20402533
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27429) - you deserved it (12939)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm - love - by Rhine (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)

Today, my ex adopted a dog from the dog pound. It was the same dog he made me get rid of while we were still together. FML

#20401539
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27406) - you deserved it (7515)

On 12/16/2012 at 12:49am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I sold some weights that were way too heavy for me on Craigslist. I felt okay with not being able to lift them when I saw the other man, who was a pretty buff dude; that is until of course he informed me he was buying them for his wife. FML

#20407956
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27316) - you deserved it (7964)

On 12/19/2012 at 6:33pm - misc - by Johnny (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, when my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I got a nose bleed. He gave me a shirt to plug it with and kept going. FML

#20195821
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27211) - you deserved it (4988)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:33am - intimacy - by anon - United States

Today, my son got suspended from school. He's in kindergarten. FML

#20201910
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27195) - you deserved it (6725)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:32pm - kids - by Renzy (woman) -

Today, I woke up from an explicit dream involving my dentist. I'm scheduled for a conscious sedation appointment with him in two hours and I'm terrified of what I might say or do while I'm under. FML

#20423262
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27183) - you deserved it (2934)

On 12/26/2012 at 9:05am - health - by ugh - United States (Ohio)

Today, at the gas station, the automatic door didn't open when I approached it. I asked the cashier to open it for me, joking that because I'm a redhead, I didn't have a soul and it wouldn't open for me. The cashier freaked and wouldn't let me go until I proved I had a soul. FML

#20199980
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27085) - you deserved it (5336)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Devil (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was texting my mother after my boyfriend broke off our relationship. She offered incredibly supportive replies such as "No, really?" and "Aww, that sucks." before apparently getting bored and claiming she had to go because her "text reception" was breaking up. FML

#20426386
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26822) - you deserved it (4475)

On 12/27/2012 at 6:20pm - love - by youfuckingdumbassmum (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, while I was removing my makeup with my boyfriend watching, he mentioned that he used to think girls were prettier without makeup on, but he'd now changed his mind. FML

#20187008
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26746) - you deserved it (2967)

On 12/01/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by allbrokeup (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, my friend spilt orange juice all over my iPad. She then went ahead to clean it off by rinsing it with water. FML

#20187648
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26712) - you deserved it (2597)

On 12/02/2012 at 5:16am - misc - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally knocked over a mall Santa on his way to meet some children. I've never had that many hate-filled eyes on me at once. FML

#20404919
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26604) - you deserved it (5741)

On 12/18/2012 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)



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