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December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after my girlfriend has recently become obsessed with the serial-killer show, Dexter, she has grown an interest in cutting up pomegranates in many different ways and squirting the red, blood-like juice everywhere. I am now afraid to argue with her. FML

#20400460
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24336) - you deserved it (2748)

On 12/15/2012 at 7:33am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up to find my best friend lying down and unresponsive. Frightened, I tapped on the glass. He got scared and started swimming again. My best friend is a fish. FML

#20199342
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24240) - you deserved it (5891)

On 12/10/2012 at 5:40pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastmanlands Lan)

Today, I went to the local used books store to sell all my college textbooks. I spent several hundred dollars on them in total. I ended up walking out of the shop a pathetic $3.50 richer. FML

#20412112
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24195) - you deserved it (6246)

On 12/21/2012 at 7:11pm - money - by futuregigolo (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while trying to take my Christmas tree down, I learned that at some point during the last few weeks, it became home to a colony of green ants. I'm now covered in bites and terrified to go anywhere near it. FML

#20426337
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24156) - you deserved it (2579)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:54pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, as my 12 hour shift was about to finish, a young boy came in wanting to buy a $200 gaming device. His mom said he was purchasing it with his own money, which I found admirable. That is, until he took his piggy bank out of his backpack. FML

#20398760
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24031) - you deserved it (1932)

On 12/14/2012 at 12:10am - kids - by Ethan_18 - United States

Today, my girlfriend accused me of cheating, because I tipped our waitress at dinner. FML

#20186136
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23995) - you deserved it (2130)

On 12/01/2012 at 12:59am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my doctor finally prescribed me some medication for my arthritis. The cap was insanely well-secured, and my hands were too racked with pain to get it off. FML

#20197805
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23960) - you deserved it (1341)

On 12/09/2012 at 3:03pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I came home to find all of the wood in my house either broken or gone. On the now legless table there was a note from my mother, saying that she needed the wood to build a boat, and that I will thank her when the world ends. FML

#20197527
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23803) - you deserved it (1326)

On 12/09/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by woodless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally got my wedding photos in the mail. As I looked through them, I soon realized that the lace material on my wedding dress was completely see-through in the sunlight, and my bra and panties were visible in every single outdoor photo. I had an outdoor wedding. FML

#20397769
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23760) - you deserved it (7253)

On 12/13/2012 at 9:35am - misc - by AboutToGoKillBillOnSomeone (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I received from my husband for Christmas the body lotion that only he uses. And nothing else. FML

#20422819
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23752) - you deserved it (2306)

On 12/26/2012 at 1:15am - misc - by marriedtoatool - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while helping out at a retirement home, I had to get a book off a bookshelf. When I reached up, my watch got stuck on my shirt, resulting in my shirt lifting up. I just flashed my man-boobs to at least 20 senior citizens, and one of them even asked if he could have a feel. FML

#20433442
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23702) - you deserved it (5543)

On 12/31/2012 at 2:58am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my best friend announced she was getting married. I've always wanted to be a bridesmaid but she then added, "You can't be in the bridal party because you don't have the same body type as the other bridesmaids. But you can still come to the bachelorette party!" FML

#20194701
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23692) - you deserved it (1688)

On 12/07/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by SBCR (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was at church, when my mom's phone went off during the sermon. As if that wasn't humiliating enough for me, her ring tone was set to the Bed Intruder song. FML

#20430388
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23629) - you deserved it (3320)

On 12/29/2012 at 5:33pm - misc - by killme (man) - United States (Maine)



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