Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he says, "There's too much of an age gap between us" and that it makes him "feel like a pedophile". He's only four months older than I am. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18977) - you deserved it (1138)
On 09/24/2012 at 4:15am - love - by Alright. (woman) - United States (Montana)
Today, I was on the toilet, when the girl I really like decided to call. I'd left my cellphone in my room and my dad answered. All he said was, "He's taking a shit. This might take a while." and hung up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18901) - you deserved it (1448)
On 09/26/2012 at 4:27pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my co-worker and I were having a conversation in Russian. Our boss overheard us talking, shouted, "I know you're talking about me! I speak Spanish too!" and threatened to fire us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18812) - you deserved it (2001)
On 09/07/2012 at 12:23pm - work - by PuddlePirate (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, a very attractive man asked me out. I'd have been flattered if I weren't the nurse assigned to his laboring wife. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18772) - you deserved it (1087)
On 09/24/2012 at 12:32am - misc - by Hello Nurse (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my mother texted me that she was in labor. She never told me she was pregnant. Apparently she's engaged too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18751) - you deserved it (198)
On 09/27/2012 at 8:41pm - misc - by annoyed - United States (Texas)
Today, I was really impressed with the man I've been in a relationship with for over 2 years. He had finally really cleaned his apartment. Everything was washed and fixed, even my stuff was cleared from open surfaces. All so his lover would not find out about me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18668) - you deserved it (1675)
On 09/30/2012 at 2:29am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Oslo)
Today, I realized that my manager and I have synchronized menstrual cycles. She gets extremely bitchy, and I get extremely vulnerable and emotional - she yells at me and I burst into tears. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18633) - you deserved it (1250)
On 09/09/2012 at 8:39pm - work - by darawbs - United States
Today, I stumbled across "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo" on TV and realized that these awful freaks are going to make more money than I ever will. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18611) - you deserved it (1693)
On 09/13/2012 at 6:29pm - money - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my girlfriend learned that calling someone a "stupid bitch" under your breath while staring right at them from six feet away works very differently in my house than at hers. She also learned my sister has one hell of a punch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18537) - you deserved it (8111)
On 09/23/2012 at 7:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I found out what it feels like to have a cotton swab shoved up my cock's piss-pipe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18527) - you deserved it (6376)
On 09/04/2012 at 11:09am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my boyfriend was showing me photos on his iPod when he came across a photo of a half-naked girl. He tried to play it off by quickly changing it, only to reveal even more half-naked girls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18449) - you deserved it (1892)
On 09/09/2012 at 10:12pm - love - by hatemyluck (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my new boyfriend came over to my apartment for the first time. Up until now I thought he was great, but when he spotted the book I'm currently reading next to my couch, he uttered the immortal question, "Why do you read?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (18436) - you deserved it (2697)
On 09/28/2012 at 1:18am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, my boyfriend called out the word "scalpel" when he orgasmed. He won't tell me why. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18367) - you deserved it (1974)
On 09/15/2012 at 3:36am - intimacy - by not the scalpel (woman) - United States (California)
Friday 24 May 2013
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