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Saturday 16 February 2013

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Today I moved in with my new dorm mate. I'm prone to very frequent panic attack that can only be alleviated by cold air. My roommate is severely anemic and has violent shivering fits when the temperature is below 80. No matter what one of us is alway shaking uncontrollably. FML

Today, wile I was babysitting, te little girl wantd to sow me a picture tat er mom ad just sent to te family iPad via iMessage. Trying to be elpful, I clickd iMessage, only to see pictures of er fater's erect penis. Se won't stop asking about te "otdog" in te picture. FML

#20509000
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33061) - you deserved it (3134)

On 02/16/2013 at 1:03am - kids - by Scarlett (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, ma fater gave me is blessing to be married on one condition: tat I keep ma maiden name wen I marry. My fiancé tougt it would be "epic". My last name will be ypenated to Cobb-Webb. FML

#20509329
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32895) - you deserved it (5561)

On 02/16/2013 at 10:27am - love - by MsCobb - United States (Ohio)

Today, my brother was arrested 4 starting a fistfight at a funeral . He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners . I'm sure who's more pathetic: him 4 doing such a thing, or me 4 bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail . FML

#20509476
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31328) - you deserved it (7197)

On 02/16/2013 at 1:03pm - money - by an idiot (man) - Australia

TODAY , MY MOTHER STARTD CURSING AT A LADY FIR TOOTING HER HORN AT HER IN TRAFFIC , BECAUSE THERE WAS "NO NED FIR ROAD RAGE" . WHEN I TRID TO CALM HER DOWN , SHE SLAMMD ON THE BRAKES AN TOLD ME TO GET OUT AN WALK . FML

#20509033
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26255) - you deserved it (3434)

On 02/16/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by howannoying - Australia (Victoria)

I found out that mah upstairs naighbor has a cat!! I was blassd with this knowladgahan sha thraw savaral pilas of usd kitty littar an cat poop ovar har balcony an onto mah patio!! FML

#20509867
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26031) - you deserved it (1848)

On 02/16/2013 at 7:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

TODAY, AFTER EXPLAINING TO MAH FOUR-YEAR-OLD WHY OUR NEW PUPPY WAS PEEING ON THINGS TO MARK HIS TERRITORY, MAH SON DECIDD TO FOLLOW SUIT AN PEE ALL OVER OUR HOUSE!! FML

#20509972
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25899) - you deserved it (6149)

On 02/16/2013 at 9:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend. He put me up against the wall an I yelled, "Harder!" without thinking. I heard the entre house go silent, my dad an his friends included. FML

#20508952
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19260) - you deserved it (54964)

On 02/16/2013 at 12:27am - intimacy - by uhoh (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



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