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Today, the city shut off the water at my house because my roommate thought that the water bills he had been hoarding were "suggestions." FML

#6118488
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28038) - you deserved it (2805)

On 11/02/2009 at 12:30pm - money - by parched (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I held a container while a patient tried to throw up in it. She missed. FML

#6268866
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24937) - you deserved it (2805)

On 11/12/2009 at 2:14am - work - by FML (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, my husband actually was cleaning our bathrooms. I had to pee and the floor was wet in my upstairs bathroom. My wonderful husband told me to go downstairs. I did and sat on the toilet seat which felt wet. He forgot he had sprayed it with Tilex. Chemical burns on your butt are great. FML

#8598142
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21441) - you deserved it (2805)

On 02/23/2010 at 8:26pm - misc - by susan - United States (Michigan)

Today, I watched Change-Up with my dad. He made us leave half-way through the movie, because he thought I was too young to watch a movie this explicit. I'm 25. FML

Today, my boyfriend read online that oversleeping has been linked to strokes later in life. He's now taken it upon himself to protect me by making sure that I have as minimal sleep as possible. FML

#20429358
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29736) - you deserved it (2805)

On 12/29/2012 at 2:33am - love - by nosleep (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was walking around the park with my wife. Out of nowhere, a little girl on a bicycle slammed in to me, knocking me to the ground. As I rolled over, sure that my ankle was broken, her father ran over to me. He screamed, "Watch where you're going, douchebag!" FML

#3107443
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59230) - you deserved it (2804)

On 06/22/2009 at 12:11am - kids - by Al (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my mom scolded me for not taking driving lessons already. This comes a few days after she told me that, "Allowing teenagers to drive is just another way of thinning out the gene pool". FML

#17232023
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24814) - you deserved it (2804)

On 07/23/2011 at 5:50pm - misc - by Norah (woman) - United States

Today, I was having a nice dream in which a beautiful butterfly flew by me and got stuck in my hair, fluttering its wings against my neck. Then I woke up and realized the "butterfly" stuck in my hair was actually a giant wood roach. FML

#16632330
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39115) - you deserved it (2804)

On 06/12/2011 at 7:33pm - animals - by Jenievonteese (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered my mother went into the local pub where I work part time, got very drunk, and flashed her boobs at everyone. I found out when a picture was posted on Facebook. FML

#16527434
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33552) - you deserved it (2804)

On 06/06/2011 at 9:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my sister is visiting. She used more toilet paper today than I have in two months. FML

#18587898
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22330) - you deserved it (2804)

On 12/23/2011 at 10:45am - misc - by jriese444 - United States (Virginia)

Today, while riding back from a weekend away with my boyfriend, we crashed his motorbike, resulting in us getting thrown over a barbed wire fence into a forest. I woke up in hospital. Apparently, in his adrenaline rush, he climbed back on his bike and continued his trip, forgetting all about me. FML

#18868829
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35725) - you deserved it (2804)

On 01/21/2012 at 6:59am - misc - by superficialheart - China

Today, as always, I have a very weak stomach. I'm in Japan right now, and all the unfamiliar foods set me off every time I eat. I can choose between having a great time and starving myself half to death, or sitting in my hotel room all day with stomach pains and diarrhea. FML

#19899821
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19593) - you deserved it (2804)

On 07/06/2012 at 12:04pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, at a talent show, my band got booed before we even started playing. FML

#20188582
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20223) - you deserved it (2804)

On 12/02/2012 at 9:26pm - misc - by disembob - United Kingdom



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