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Today, my girlfriend woefully admitted that she thinks of me more as a brother than as a boyfriend, all while I was still inside her. FML

#18927018
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37990) - you deserved it (3000)

On 01/27/2012 at 5:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad looked at him and said, "Nice outfit, but it's a little late for Halloween." Before I could intervene, my boyfriend said that joke had been done to death, to which my dad retorted, "Yeah, so has your mum." Instant fistfight. FML

#20144826
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29246) - you deserved it (3000)

On 11/02/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by for fuck sake dad (woman) - Ireland (Limerick)

Today, I learned who my dad's new fiancée is. Upon meeting her she exclaimed, "My, I haven't seen you in a while!" She's my ex-boyfriend's mom. FML

#20450908
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36164) - you deserved it (3000)

On 01/09/2013 at 10:15pm - love - by wtf dad - United States (Missouri)

Today, I finally told my father that I was picked on at college all this year over my hearing disability. When I told him one of the jokes they made about me, he burst out into an uncontrollable fit of laughter. FML

#20999250
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39751) - you deserved it (3000)

On 12/20/2013 at 3:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend gushed for several minutes about how amazing it is that I suddenly look hot when he takes his glasses off. FML

#21292702
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31121) - you deserved it (3000)

On 11/05/2014 at 1:49pm - love - by aspiemeanswell (woman) - Germany (Thuringen)

Today, my best friend told me she was pregnant over the phone. While in the middle of telling her congrats, she told me it was with my boyfriend. FML

#4086782
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63404) - you deserved it (2999)

On 07/27/2009 at 7:10pm - misc - by thatonekid (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, it was my grandfather's burial. As the family was about to leave, a great aunt came up to my skinny, tall and pretty cousin and told her, "Stay beautiful and kind." Then, she walked to me and said, "And you, Stay kind." FML

#5942198
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31502) - you deserved it (2999)

On 10/22/2009 at 8:26am - misc - by kthx (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I found out that my wife purposely eats peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to get out of kissing me. I'm deathly allergic to peanuts. FML

#18898417
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34796) - you deserved it (2999)

On 01/24/2012 at 12:31pm - love - by Allergic (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took my girlfriend out to eat at a diner where my friend works. My friend was our waiter but too busy to talk much. He texted me after we'd left to tell me that my girlfriend had slipped him her number. FML

#20894038
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49181) - you deserved it (2999)

On 09/24/2013 at 3:15am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my parents used my going away party as a cover up for my sister's surprise party. I didn't know until they brought out the cake. FML

#21022962
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39446) - you deserved it (2999)

On 01/09/2014 at 9:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sri Lanka

Today, my boyfriend dumped me so he could sleep with my mom without feeling guilty. FML

#7304423
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34763) - you deserved it (2998)

On 01/12/2010 at 6:54pm - intimacy - by notasgood (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after constantly checking my email for a week, I finally got a letter saying that I was accepted to take a test for a job position. The only problem is I was scheduled to test today, eight hours ago. FML

#13565475
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24283) - you deserved it (2998)

On 10/23/2010 at 6:11pm - work - by level6 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad and I were in the car when a rabbit scurried across the road, just missing us. My dad turned and said to me, "Well, it's good we didn't hit him. He gets to live another day." I then looked in the rear view mirror to see the rabbit running away from the cross traffic, only to be hit by the car behind us. FML

#9102050
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21852) - you deserved it (2998)

On 03/15/2010 at 12:44pm - misc - by bunnylover (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)



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