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Today, I was at work in a lab. I spent all day growing a large bacterial culture. I went to retrieve it, only to find that someone had turned the incubation shaker up too high, and my flask had flown off and shattered. Not only did I lose all my work, but now the whole room is a biohazard. FML

#3859310
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39539) - you deserved it (3105)

On 07/18/2009 at 3:46pm - work - by startingover (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I drove by a restaurant I ate at yesterday. I write a food review column for my college paper, and I've tried everything on their menu. They were being closed down today because a large amount of rat droppings was found in their food supplies. FML

Today, I found out where all my expensive bras and panties have been disappearing to. Apparently, while I'm at work, my fifteen year-old son's girlfriend has been stealing them after they have sex in my bed. FML

#6874607
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26027) - you deserved it (3105)

On 12/21/2009 at 10:28pm - intimacy - by Secretisout (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I realised that what I had thought was my dad's default state for the past 17 years is actually his drunken state. FML

#15844310
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28645) - you deserved it (3105)

On 04/19/2011 at 5:50am - misc - by Violet (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I finally unfriended my roommate's mom on Facebook after months of her commenting on my wall multiple times a day and basically stalking me. After discovering this, she drove to our apartment to demand through hysterical tears that my roommate move out because I can't be trusted. FML

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because he thought he heard another guy in the room when he called me, and that I'm cheating on him. The guy he heard was a character from a cartoon my sister was watching. FML

#20958917
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40390) - you deserved it (3105)

On 11/15/2013 at 5:35pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, it's my birthday. The only "happy birthday"s I got were from my mom, her Facebook account, and the Facebook account she made for her cat. FML

#20991213
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41668) - you deserved it (3105)

On 12/13/2013 at 12:24pm - misc - by carboncoach (man) - Egypt

Today, I found out my girlfriend is bulimic. Like that wasn't bad enough, I found out because she spent all of our rent money on food. FML

#21345004
112 comments

Today, my sister is nursing an injured cat back to health in our home because she accidentally hit it with her car. Now I can't decide which is contributing more to my insomnia: the incessant meowing, or the constant itching because our house is infested with fleas. FML

#12889600
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22789) - you deserved it (3104)

On 09/03/2010 at 7:02pm - health - by insomniac (man) -

Today, I was told that I may die by the time I'm 30, and that I should Google the disorder because he doesn't know what it is for sure. FML

#16909207
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39560) - you deserved it (3104)

On 06/29/2011 at 12:44pm - health - by Googleit - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend kindly informed me that if I ever got bitten during a zombie apocalypse, he'd love me enough to beat me to death with a tire iron. He said this because he's been having vivid dreams about it happening. I honestly don't know whether he's joking or not. FML

#17775098
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22362) - you deserved it (3104)

On 09/18/2011 at 8:23pm - love - by DeadScared (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I told my mom I loved her and she asked if I was going to kill myself. FML

#18155
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39362) - you deserved it (3103)

On 02/09/2009 at 7:11pm - misc - by TGIkaty - United States (California)

Today, while trying to pull a nail out of some wood with a crowbar in my theatre class, my girlfriend, who was holding down the wood with her foot, thought it would be funny to move her foot and make me lose my balance. Instead, the crowbar flew up and struck me in the nuts. FML

#8794637
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25757) - you deserved it (3103)

On 03/03/2010 at 6:13am - misc - by ouch... (man) - United States (Alabama)



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