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Today, my girlfriend told me that her parents have a bet going on when we are going to break up. FML

#14381154
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25183) - you deserved it (2968)

On 12/29/2010 at 10:24am - love - by ... -

Today, I took my kids to the circus. We were having fun, right up until the point they saw an old man dressed as a clown, at which point they screamed, grabbed onto my shorts, and managed to accidentally pull them down. FML

#17396996
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23971) - you deserved it (2968)

On 08/07/2011 at 1:14pm - kids - by SheaLili - United States (California)

Today, I woke up with bowel problems which have been causing me to violently pass wind every couple of minutes. I have to spend the next two hours sitting an exam in dead silence. FML

#16607175
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33932) - you deserved it (2968)

On 06/11/2011 at 4:48am - health - by pleasestop (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was in class and really needed to pee. My teacher has chosen to replace our hall pass with a copy of War and Peace. She picks out a page for us to memorise on the shitter, and repeat by heart later. If we can't remember, we get locked out of class, and then get detention for being absent. FML

#17789217
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33785) - you deserved it (2968)

On 09/20/2011 at 5:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to bury my horse again because coyotes keep digging it up. FML

#19230527
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40058) - you deserved it (2968)

On 03/06/2012 at 11:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to the water park with my boyfriend. A swimsuit was required to go on the rides. My bikini straps somehow got torn off and I had nothing else with me. My boyfriend said, "Hell, just wear my spare shorts. You could pass as a guy with your chest". FML

#19642292
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27906) - you deserved it (2968)

On 05/18/2012 at 3:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, coming home from a trip in the mountains, I got a cracked radiator and my car overheated. My dad came to get me, he drove my car and I followed in his. I got pulled over and ticketed for his expired registration. FML

#21263040
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32890) - you deserved it (2968)

On 09/22/2014 at 10:25am - misc - by willconqueror1 - United States

Today, while waiting to do a presentation in class I felt someone flick my back, but when I turned around no one was there. It wasn't until I got up in front of the whole class that I felt my bra slowly sliding down my body. Turns out that the "flick" I felt was actually my bra clasp busting open. FML

#8632694
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26107) - you deserved it (2968)

On 02/25/2010 at 2:05am - misc - by thewordsicantsay (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I couldn't fall asleep till 3am and was woken approximately every hour or so. Why? I found out my new upstairs neighbors have a very active love life. She's a screamer. FML

#12404191
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33564) - you deserved it (2967)

On 08/09/2010 at 2:18am - intimacy - by SleeplessInSoCal (woman) - United States (California)

Today, whilst at my job as a lifeguard, a small child decided he couldn't hold it any longer and released his bowels in the pool. It was my job to clean up his dump, including the floating pieces of sweetcorn. FML

#16474774
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36845) - you deserved it (2967)

On 06/02/2011 at 9:44pm - work - by corn - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my mom, who is relatively new to Facebook, posted on her friend's wall, telling her about her recent diagnosis of vaginal thrush. She assumed that her wall post was private. Six of my friends liked the post. FML

#18417580
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33963) - you deserved it (2967)

On 12/03/2011 at 6:23am - intimacy - by djkimmaz - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I almost got written up for insubordination by my boss. All I did was explain to him that I couldn't help a tourist out because I speak Japanese, not Korean, and that it's not in fact "the same Asian shit" as he seemed to think. FML

#21177954
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43207) - you deserved it (2967)

On 06/17/2014 at 11:28am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, the gas station right in front of my apartment had people listening to loud music all night. I have this 3 hour test at 7:30am and didn't get any sleep. Worst of all, here in Brazil, calling the police won't help a thing. Instead of actually helping, they'll stop and join the party. FML

#5462375
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39002) - you deserved it (2966)

On 09/25/2009 at 4:33am - misc - by stupidpolicia (woman) - Brazil (Distrito Federal)



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