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Today, my best friend told me she was pregnant over the phone. While in the middle of telling her congrats, she told me it was with my boyfriend. FML

#4086782
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66643) - you deserved it (3276)

On 07/27/2009 at 7:10pm - misc - by thatonekid (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out that my dad recently created a Facebook account for himself. So I friended him. He refuses to accept my friend request. He did, however, accept my sister's. FML

#8686937
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27368) - you deserved it (3276)

On 02/27/2010 at 10:58am - misc - by msmusiclover7 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had an interview. I didn't get the job because apparently customers might not understand me, since I "talk too good." I just graduated with an English degree. FML

#11808834
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36512) - you deserved it (3276)

On 07/11/2010 at 10:44am - work - by alejandro38 - United States (New York)

Today, at an Aunt's wake, my five year old son walked up to the coffin, and, with the whole family around him, exclaimed, "Well that's good, I was wondering where she's been." FML

#13635730
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30216) - you deserved it (3276)

On 10/29/2010 at 4:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while in a public restroom I could hear a guy having his way with his hand. He was quoting verses from the bible. I was in a cubicle and he was at the urinal. I was too frightened to leave. This went on for a very long time. FML

#14234444
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36083) - you deserved it (3276)

On 12/17/2010 at 11:05am - intimacy - by biblewanker - Australia

Today, I realized that the fish-shaped birth mark on the back of my leg, that I have had all my life, is not really shaped like a fish as I had originally thought. It looks just like a penis. FML

#14234557
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30419) - you deserved it (3276)

On 12/17/2010 at 11:23am - health - by BYUwildchild - United States

Today, after setting up surveillance in my front yard to see whose dog keeps crapping on my lawn, I finally caught the culprit on film. It was my heroin addict neighbour. FML

#15260051
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37591) - you deserved it (3276)

On 03/10/2011 at 6:09am - animals - by Tom -

Today, my ex-boyfriend dumped sand into the crankcase of my truck and then filled it to the top with water after I dumped him for being immature and not respecting my things. FML

#21427999
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30055) - you deserved it (3276)

On 06/18/2015 at 8:36am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my ex girlfriend that I still love sent me a text, quote "I still love you, but i'm not IN love with you" um. what? FML

#779
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25245) - you deserved it (3275)

On 01/07/2009 at 2:23pm - love - by wtf - United States (Michigan)

Today, after work, I parked in the parking lot I go to every day to let heavy traffic go by. As I was about to leave, two cops suddenly yanked me out of the car and arrested me for "stocking," as they spelled it on the report. Some paranoid girl thought I was parking there every day to watch her. FML

Today, I parked in front of a grocery store and took the portable GPS system off the mount on the dashboard and put it in my pocket so no one would break into my car and steal it. When I got back, the window was smashed and someone had stolen the plastic mount. FML

#5194159
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39726) - you deserved it (3275)

On 09/11/2009 at 8:40pm - misc - by sucksforme (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist and thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a red laser light through his window. I was on the stairs when he ran past, screaming bloody murder, sending me down a flight of steps. FML

#20919796
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44228) - you deserved it (3275)

On 10/14/2013 at 3:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, my little sister complained about a young boy in her class always pulling her hair. She asked when boys will stop doing it. My mom replied, "They won't, even when they're grown-ups," then looked over at my dad and shared a dirty smirk. FML

#21369959
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36254) - you deserved it (3275)

On 03/07/2015 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by greatly disturbed - United States (California)



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