Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I moved into my new house. I went over to my neighbors' house to introduce myself. As they opened the door I saw a telescope pointed at my house. FML

#17066979
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30950) - you deserved it (2384)

On 07/11/2011 at 2:16pm - misc - by BMike - United States (Kentucky)

Today, the phone rang. I run to get the call, I trip, fall on a metal chair. Tears in my eyes and out of breath I pick up... "Hi, do you have a minute to answer a few questions? It's for a survey." FML

#1820
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12046) - you deserved it (2383)

On 01/20/2009 at 2:59am - misc - by Kika - Sent from mobile version

Today, I came home and found my desk devoid of all paper. Turned out my mom dropped by and wanted to surprise me by cleaning up my work area. She threw away over 7 months worth of irreplaceable original sketches, notes and storylines, thinking they were worthless. My job is a full-time artist. FML

#2701716
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56254) - you deserved it (2383)

On 06/07/2009 at 8:17pm - work - by Kilika (man) - United States (California)

Today, I set off a fire alarm in school. I was taken to the head teacher's office, where he said that though he was shocked at my behavior, it was nice to see me being more like regular students and trying to fit in, instead of isolating myself as usual. I was shoved into the fire alarm by bullies. FML

#6598474
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35736) - you deserved it (2383)

On 12/04/2009 at 11:35am - misc - by tawan - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my roommate and I got into an argument. He told me he understood if I didn't forgive him "for a couple of days." He'd confessed to undressing my girlfriend in her sleep. FML

#17447904
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32371) - you deserved it (2383)

On 08/12/2011 at 3:54am - intimacy - by James (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I noticed a woman struggling to work a parking meter, so I went over to help. She took one look at me before screaming, hitting me in the face, and running back to her car. FML

#17030177
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21641) - you deserved it (2383)

On 07/08/2011 at 4:02pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I had to explain very slowly to my mum why she cannot put metal cutlery in the microwave. She did it anyway. FML

#16354209
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27332) - you deserved it (2383)

On 05/26/2011 at 5:48am - misc - by smarterthanmymum - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend received a scam email about her great uncle dying and leaving her money. She not only believed it, but she also used my credit card details for it. FML

#20014872
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23822) - you deserved it (2383)

On 08/11/2012 at 5:13am - money - by scammerssuck - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I saw a friend in the street but he didn't see me, so as a joke I decided to ring him. He took his mobile out of his pocket, sighed and didn't pick up. FML

#1016
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26531) - you deserved it (2382)

On 01/12/2009 at 9:47pm - misc - by patty - Sent from mobile version

Today, I flew to California to visit my younger sister at college. When I got to her house, her boyfriend looks at her and says, "Shes not THAT ugly." FML

#13554523
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24485) - you deserved it (2382)

On 10/22/2010 at 8:57pm - misc - by annonymus - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my mom was screaming at me and said, "I wish I'd never adopted you." I guess I'm adopted then. FML

#17371969
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49993) - you deserved it (2382)

On 08/04/2011 at 10:45pm - misc - by Thebestman123 - United States (Iowa)

Today, I woke up to my mom washing the dishes completely naked. Sadly, I was more surprised by the fact she was doing the dishes than the fact that that she was strutting about in her birthday suit. FML

#17330120
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27723) - you deserved it (2382)

On 08/01/2011 at 8:55am - intimacy - by notsurprised (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, we had a lockdown in our school for 2 hours because a man was sitting outside our school in his car with a gun in hand. I texted my mom telling her what was going on and that it's on the news. She responded saying "I'll tape it". FML

#5605398
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24955) - you deserved it (2381)

On 10/02/2009 at 3:17pm - misc - by dannyboy1422 (man) - United States (Texas)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: