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Today, my boyfriend of 4 years asked my dad if he could marry me, and my dad agreed. He then tells me that he's not going to propose for maybe another year at least, he "just wanted to get that out of the way." FML

#18610596
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28987) - you deserved it (3325)

On 12/25/2011 at 8:28pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I saw my cat playing with one of his many toy mice. Knowing he likes to play fetch, I picked it up and threw it across the room. Upon trying to pick it up a second time, I realized that not only was it not a toy, but it was only half-dead. FML

#20174725
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24449) - you deserved it (3325)

On 11/23/2012 at 1:17am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my bed fell through my floor. With me on it. FML

#21352624
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34857) - you deserved it (3325)

On 02/09/2015 at 8:26am - misc - by wtf?? - Saint Vincent and the Grenadines

Today, I was sitting in my chemistry class when a sick girl behind me asked "Can I go to the bathroom?" My teacher, being smart said, "Don't you mean MAY I use the bathroom?" Meanwhile, the girl behind me started throwing up all over her desk and me. FML

#901011
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66580) - you deserved it (3324)

On 04/10/2009 at 12:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got home early from work. When I got home I got to see my dad chasing my mom around the house, naked. FML

#9015230
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31117) - you deserved it (3324)

On 03/12/2010 at 1:05am - misc - by ugh - United States

Today, I called my boyfriend to tell him how excited I was to drive 12 hours to see him and his new house. His girlfriend answered. FML

#11497127
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38429) - you deserved it (3324)

On 06/27/2010 at 2:03pm - misc - by ac13 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

#20079475
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62592) - you deserved it (3324)

On 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm - intimacy - by identitychangeplease - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I celebrated my birthday with my friend who has the same birthday by going out to dinner with a bunch of our friends. The waiter brought out a cake for my friend but not for me. No one noticed my exclusion. I sang happy birthday on my birthday. FML

#109688
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53982) - you deserved it (3323)

On 02/22/2009 at 11:05pm - misc - by jet8725 - United States (Virginia)

Today, after confessing my love for my best friend, he looked at me and said "I'm not feeling it. But does this mean we can have sex?" FML

#7618857
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23516) - you deserved it (3323)

On 01/27/2010 at 7:09pm - intimacy - by Boned...hard - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend blew up at me for a comment I had made several weeks ago about not wanting kids. Then, she told me that she's pregnant. After consoling her and telling her that whatever we do, we'll do it together, she further explained that she's not sure if it's mine. FML

#8841387
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38469) - you deserved it (3323)

On 03/05/2010 at 7:54am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, a guy at my work asked if I could fix his computer in his cubicle. The first thing I see on the screen when he logs me onto it is an anime porn game with tentacles. My boss walks by, stares at me and then laughs uncontrollably. FML

#14033332
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30426) - you deserved it (3323)

On 11/30/2010 at 3:48am - intimacy - by Jack -

Today, I had diarrhea in a Walmart bathroom for 15 minutes. Apparently, so did the guy in the stall next to me. He attempted to make small talk to pass the time. FML

#13005012
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30894) - you deserved it (3323)

On 09/11/2010 at 2:59pm - misc - by wantontsu -

Today, I had a toothache and applied some numbing gel to soothe the pain. Too much came out and made my whole mouth numb. A man came into my work, thought I was making fun of his lisp, and stormed out really upset. He later called to complain about me. The boss just called me to his office. FML

#13688045
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24587) - you deserved it (3323)

On 11/02/2010 at 1:20pm - work - by speechless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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