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Today, while at a family gathering for New Years, my aunt said she needed a flat surface to write on. My dad immediately piped up, "Why don't you use Samantha's chest?" I'm Samantha. I'm also 18. FML

#14412798
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32428) - you deserved it (3151)

On 12/31/2010 at 7:05pm - misc - by ilik3catz (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I woke up to a pile of hair on my floor. I looked in the mirror and realized the hair was from my head. I had a dream about cutting my hair and I guess it came true. FML

#14721795
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24996) - you deserved it (3151)

On 01/26/2011 at 4:49pm - misc - by Larz (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my dad decided to wake me up by opening the shades and having the sun shine on my face. When he pulled them up, the metal holder on top broke off and fell on me. FML

#15822401
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26390) - you deserved it (3151)

On 04/17/2011 at 2:32pm - misc - by zoearcu - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by rapping in a voicemail. FML

#20053776
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26982) - you deserved it (3151)

On 09/02/2012 at 8:44am - love - by rotezora (woman) - Switzerland (Basel-Stadt)

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML

#21283288
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42632) - you deserved it (3151)

On 10/22/2014 at 6:38pm - intimacy - by BadLuckLad (man) - United Kingdom (Portsmouth)

Today, my 97-pound pitbull wagged and chased his tail while I was being mugged. FML

#21350749
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33352) - you deserved it (3152)

On 02/06/2015 at 2:06am - animals - by ZAnon - United States (Texas)

Today, alone on Valentine's day, I decided to eat chocolate and watch romantic comedies in bed. I had an allergic reaction to the chocolate which sent me to the ER. FML

#21356363
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31340) - you deserved it (3152)

On 02/14/2015 at 11:07pm - misc - by Rubyscooby212 - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I asked my husband to come upstairs to our bedroom, thinking I could get some "special time." It ended up with us arguing about his mother, and him falling asleep cuddling my pillow while sucking his thumb. FML

#20113138
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19764) - you deserved it (3150)

On 10/12/2012 at 2:15am - love - by anonymous2.0 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend moved. He moved from my room... to my housemate's room. FML

#14616202
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29082) - you deserved it (3150) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 5:50pm - love - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I was eating with my grandma and her sister, who don't get along. I went to the bathroom for just 2 minutes, only to come back to find pancakes everywhere and our plates smashed on the ground. They got into a "little argument". FML

#20835313
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40240) - you deserved it (3150)

On 08/13/2013 at 12:01pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I asked my girlfriend to marry me. She pretended like it never happened. FML

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over a stupid argument, but after a long day we made up and got back together. Not long afterwards, my friend called, feeling guilty and confessing that he had sex with her after finding out she'd dumped me. FML

#21332729
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39194) - you deserved it (3150)

On 01/07/2015 at 2:37pm - love - by Anonymous - Guam

Today, I was extremely constipated. This is a side effect of the medication I take to alleviate my stomach condition. Due to this same condition I can't eat much roughage. We have no laxatives or stool softeners, and I have been shitting bricks for three days. FML

#14124824
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21877) - you deserved it (3149)

On 12/07/2010 at 9:38pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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