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Today, I had a date with a girl I'd been seeing for about a month. When I got home, I saw her facebook status changed to "In a relationship". This made me kind of excited, until I realized it wasn't with me. FML

#14848305
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34255) - you deserved it (3643)

On 02/05/2011 at 2:16am - love - by sadman (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out my mom intentionally puts extra butter and oil in the food she cooks for me because she wants me to be fatter than her. FML

#16355568
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57164) - you deserved it (3643)

On 05/26/2011 at 10:24am - health - by fatteningmeup (woman) - United States

Today, my dog died. In the same kitchen corner that two of my other dogs have died. I have a "Corner Of Death" in my kitchen. FML

#20833377
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57726) - you deserved it (3643)

On 08/12/2013 at 4:17am - animals - by The Corner Of Death (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I confronted my girlfriend after catching her cheating on me. After she finished crying, she had the brass balls to say she'd understand if I needed a couple of weeks to forgive her, and asked me for bus fare so she could go tell the other guy they could only be friends now. FML

#21280490
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41371) - you deserved it (3643)

On 10/18/2014 at 2:44pm - love - by yee-whore (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I went on my very first date. We went out to eat dinner and everything went great! Afterwards, I went to drop him back off at his house. I backed out of his driveway and got stuck in a ditch. His dad had to come out and tow me out. So that's how I met my boyfriend's parents. FML

#21422583
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25627) - you deserved it (3643)

On 06/07/2015 at 11:35pm - love - by firstdategoals - United States

Today, at my job as a cashier, a man and his 3-year old son got in line. The father said, "Give this to the pretty lady," looking at me. The kid looks at me, looks at his dad, and walks over to the next cashier. FML

#806381
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66769) - you deserved it (3642)

On 04/04/2009 at 9:07pm - kids - by Nottheprettylady (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, and for quite some time, my girlfriend has been telling me that she needs to go home each night to take care of her cat. Taking care of her cat is, it seems, an euphemism for having it off with her neighbor Tom since her cat died three months ago. FML

#4650437
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46672) - you deserved it (3642)

On 08/19/2009 at 5:08am - love - by catguy (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at work as a grocery store cashier. I felt a hand slap my ass. Turning around I saw an old man winking at me and I screamed. When my manager came to deal with the problem she didn't believe me and gave the man a $25 gift card for 'the trouble' I caused. FML

#15247228
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40327) - you deserved it (3642)

On 03/09/2011 at 12:36am - work - by Cashier (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, even though I don't necessarily believe in soul mates, I found out my wife does. She met hers a few weeks ago. FML

#20896483
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45598) - you deserved it (3642)

On 09/26/2013 at 2:54am - love - by NotTheSoulMate (man) - United States

Today, I was dressing in front of my boyfriend. He was looking at me in wonder and I assumed this was a good thing. Then he muttered, "God damn, you're awkwardly shaped." FML

#21011563
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43135) - you deserved it (3642)

On 12/31/2013 at 12:47pm - misc - by awkword (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went on a date with this guy and he was on his phone the whole night. When I got home I checked his facebook since he barely paid attention to me. His status was, "So-and-so is taking out the trash" from mobile posted an hour ago. I got home from my date 30 mins ago. FML

#2920786
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39531) - you deserved it (3641)

On 06/15/2009 at 7:57pm - love - by skreweduP (woman) - United States

Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML

#18336712
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35231) - you deserved it (3641)

On 11/24/2011 at 12:07pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend. He won't go on a cruise with me in the gulf of Mexico, because he thinks we will crash into an iceberg like in Titanic. FML

#19950905
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27351) - you deserved it (3641)

On 07/17/2012 at 5:11pm - love - by Alliente - United States



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