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Today, I saw a my neighbor being mugged on the street. I wanted to help, so I tried to yank her purse from the mugger's hands. I guess my neighbor didn't see me clearly, because she thought I was another mugger and kicked my directly in the happy sacks. FML

#6452828
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27912) - you deserved it (3054)

On 11/25/2009 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to move my dog that had been napping in the middle of my bed for the last few hours, only to discover that he wasn't napping. He died. FML

#12964017
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58979) - you deserved it (3054)

On 09/08/2010 at 3:23pm - animals - by jrad - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend woke me up at 5 am because she thought someone was watching her from the park. It was a trash can. FML

#17507897
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25603) - you deserved it (3054)

On 08/18/2011 at 6:02am - misc - by boyfriend123 - United States

Today, one of my classmates pointed out that our professor has a habit of sucking his teeth at the end of each sentence. I'd never noticed before. I can't concentrate anymore, all I can focus on is his weird teeth noise thing. FML

#18354788
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21372) - you deserved it (3055)

On 11/26/2011 at 7:18am - work - by taternuts - Canada

Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML

#18403998
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54628) - you deserved it (3054)

On 12/01/2011 at 3:32pm - intimacy - by sometingwong (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I realized that I spend more money on gas to go to my job than what I get paid. FML

#20086643
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23237) - you deserved it (3054)

On 09/24/2012 at 2:21pm - work - by izziegrl - Mexico (Mexico)

Today, I went to take my driver's test, and I did almost everything perfectly. The last thing was to back into a driveway. As I went to put my hand on the passenger seat to look over my shoulder, I got so nervous that I hit my instructor in the face. FML

#19782263
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24418) - you deserved it (3054)

On 06/13/2012 at 2:13pm - misc - by sopissed - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went on a fifth date with a guy, and he asked me if we could be boyfriend and girlfriend. Just after I said yes, he pulled out a contract and asked me to sign on the dotted line. FML

#19983177
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27344) - you deserved it (3054)

On 07/25/2012 at 9:03am - love - by Unlucky (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I moved into a new house, I couldn't help but notice a car alarm going off, so I investigated my neighbors. Turns out it's their bird. It imitates chainsaws, car alarms, and much more. FML

#20908147
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42834) - you deserved it (3054)

On 10/05/2013 at 9:51am - animals - by Mike Messenger - United States (Florida)

Today, I received my graduation gift, a bath robe, from my parents. My have two older sisters also graduated. The first one got a Tiffany's bracelet, the second one got a plane ticket to Europe. FML

#260878
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68132) - you deserved it (3053)

On 03/10/2009 at 2:37pm - misc - by dileigh (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my Dad decided to take his medicine before eating. He passed out with his face in a plate of chocolate cake. He wasn't responsive so I called the paramedics. When he got to the hospital, the doctor asked him if he knew why he was there. He replied, "Because my stupid daughter over reacted." FML

#6298520
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31604) - you deserved it (3053)

On 11/14/2009 at 7:35am - misc - by Kassiopia (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend and I went on a 1 day cruise to the Bahamas. It happened to be on the same day of the worst sailing conditions. We spent 6 hours throwing up together. Him into the sink, and me into the toilet. We spent $200 to see the inside of our cabin's bathroom. FML

#8280638
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22663) - you deserved it (3053)

On 02/15/2010 at 12:03am - love - by SeaSick (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was stripped of my starting position on my high school basketball team. The reason? I was three minutes late to practice. Why was I late? My coach called me five minutes before practice and made me get him a coffee or else he wouldn't start me. FML

#14430499
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36580) - you deserved it (3053)

On 01/01/2011 at 10:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)



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