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Today, my boyfriend admitted that the only reason he remembers my eye color is because it's the same shade of his shit after he's had a salad. FML

#18121591
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32871) - you deserved it (3240)

On 10/31/2011 at 4:06pm - love - by poopcoloredeyes (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my dad tore my room apart for the second time, looking for drug-making equipment. His reasoning is that I must be dealing drugs, because I'm a chemistry major who likes to watch Breaking Bad. FML

#20863540
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44901) - you deserved it (3240)

On 09/01/2013 at 7:06pm - misc - by WaltTheFuckDad (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to my grandma's yard sale, only to find my baby pictures being sold for 25 cents each. FML

#21275511
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40513) - you deserved it (3240)

On 10/11/2014 at 10:43am - misc - by Forge (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I have been getting calls from a weird kid from my school asking for nudes. I asked how he got my number, then found out that my friends put my number on a pole at school saying "Call Wendy for a good time, she has nice tits". FML

#6719670
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30766) - you deserved it (3239)

On 12/12/2009 at 6:02am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my family and I went to the mall. We all split up in a department store to shop for our own clothes. While shopping, I caught my dad feeling up a mannequin in the back corner of the store. FML

#10414091
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39251) - you deserved it (3239)

On 05/08/2010 at 6:07am - intimacy - by notmydad. (woman) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, my boyfriend asked me to beat him up so he could look tough around his friends. When I just stared at him, he added, "Please don't break anything though. Nothing too serious." FML

#17845836
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23667) - you deserved it (3239)

On 09/27/2011 at 4:28am - health - by toughbf (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I caught my mother trying to text on her iPhone, with her nipple. FML

#18364433
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39230) - you deserved it (3239)

On 11/27/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, neither of my parents fought for my custody. FML

#19763325
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51312) - you deserved it (3239)

On 06/10/2012 at 12:19am - misc - by Anon - United States

Today, I finally went to the doctor's about my severe anxiety. I am so used to putting on a happy performance around people that she didn't believe anything was wrong with me. FML

#21376536
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (170) - you deserved it (3239)

On 03/17/2015 at 5:35pm - health - by scared - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I discovered a bat in my new apartment. I found him in my shoe... with my foot. FML

#12583063
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32424) - you deserved it (3238)

On 08/17/2010 at 1:09pm - misc - by Bruce (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I visited my vacation cabin. I've been planning to sell it, and it was in perfect condition when I last visited about 6 months ago. I walked in the door to find the floor covered in muddy pawprints and bloody remainders of meals. It appears some bears moved in during my absence. FML

#13313277
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26448) - you deserved it (3238)

On 10/04/2010 at 2:46am - misc - by screwthewilderness (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, a little girl wandered into the glass-cleaning area of the pub I work at. It's a dangerous place for a little kid, so I took her hand and asked where her mum was. The kid starts screaming and the mother appears in the doorway shouting "GET AWAY FROM MY BABY!" FML

#15967561
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32926) - you deserved it (3238)

On 04/28/2011 at 7:13pm - work - by srsly_what (man) - United Kingdom (North Yorkshire)

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I had been hiding the ring in the sock drawer. When I went to retrieve it, the ring was gone and in its place was a sticky note that said "NO." FML

#18508427
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53082) - you deserved it (3239)

On 12/14/2011 at 12:15am - love - by newlysingle (man) - United States



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