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Today, at my internship, I was told we were going to do something fun. I was excited, until I found out that this "fun" thing was labeling 500 folders. FML

#19017248
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20431) - you deserved it (3248)

On 02/07/2012 at 10:07am - work - by strongjon60 - United States

Today, I had an interview for my dream job. I was offered coffee and a donut. It was going well until I took a bite of the donut and started choking on it. I coughed so hard I ended up vomiting into his garbage can. FML

#19781489
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23790) - you deserved it (3248)

On 06/13/2012 at 10:50am - work - by lonelyharts86 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my skydiving instructor casually remarked that he wouldn't mind "diving into" me sometime. He was strapped to my back the whole way down. FML

#20434488
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36443) - you deserved it (3248)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by _The__Doctor_ (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I graduated from college with two undergrad degrees in biochem and wildlife biology, with high distinction. My mom told me she had found me a job at a petting zoo. I thought she was joking. She then said sternly "I want grandkids. At least you will meet girls there." FML

#1798855
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47376) - you deserved it (3247)

On 05/10/2009 at 12:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I went for a run in a new pair of shoes that left me with huge blisters. As I finished cleaning them up so they could heal, I limped to my bed to take a nap. I was woken by the fire alarm. My building was having a drill and we couldn't use the elevators. I live on the 9th floor. FML

#6296943
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26511) - you deserved it (3247)

On 11/14/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by runner - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I received a restraining order from a girl I have never met. FML

#13808592
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34483) - you deserved it (3247)

On 11/11/2010 at 10:55pm - misc - by Bob - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that our neighbors told almost everyone on our street that I was mentally handicapped. All this time I wasn't sure why they would speak slowly and loudly at me. Now they won't believe me when I tell them I'm a 4.0 GPA student. FML

#15650544
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33232) - you deserved it (3247)

On 04/05/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by Imslow (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, at the train station a woman's baggage had gotten stuck in the ticket barriers, so I used my ticket to unlock the barriers for her but told her to wait so I could get through too. She didn't wait. And I got painfully stuck in the barriers whilst I watched my train go by. FML

#21337468
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32285) - you deserved it (3247)

On 01/15/2015 at 6:35am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, my girlfriend returned home from a several week vacation with family. Instead of a happy reunion, I was terribly emasculated, publicly, for bringing flowers that "weren't as pretty as all the other couples' in baggage claim." FML

#20458802
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33072) - you deserved it (3246)

On 01/14/2013 at 10:47am - misc - by badenoughflowers - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother came over to visit, and my kids started excitedly telling her Christmas is coming soon. She freaked out, saying Christmas is a "Satanic holiday" and telling them that Santa is going to hell along with everyone who celebrates it. My children are now traumatized. FML

#20933801
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41334) - you deserved it (3246)

On 10/25/2013 at 7:20pm - kids - by Jane M (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, while I was waiting at a red light, a drunk guy limped in front of my car, unzipped, and started pissing on my windshield. FML

#21080535
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40707) - you deserved it (3246)

On 03/07/2014 at 1:51pm - misc - by Jehovah God (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to find a huge zit directly between my two eyebrows. My friends have started calling me "The North Star." FML

#21253662
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35000) - you deserved it (3246)

On 09/07/2014 at 11:55am - health - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was refilling some guy's iced tea at bandana's, and the uppity jerk had the gall to ask me if I ever kissed a girl considering how fat I am, how high my voice is, and how little money I make. FML

#4601
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31014) - you deserved it (3245)

On 02/01/2009 at 9:41am - work - by sportskidguru - United States (Missouri)



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