Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my sister drove past meile i was walking ome in te rain, se onkd to let me know se was tere, and kept on driving. FML

#16480060
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36929) - you deserved it (3223)

On 06/03/2011 at 4:55am - misc - by myhairgetsfrizzywhenwet (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

today I was the waiter fir mah family at the village inn!! This wasn't so bad until I found out they left me no tip , only a napkin that said , "Get a haircut." FML

#17106364
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23476) - you deserved it (3223)

On 07/14/2011 at 10:17am - work - by alek - United States

Today.. . I spent five hours sobbing in mah room due to anti-depressant withdrawal . My mother refused to come an talk to me.. . because I'm "a terrible.. . hateful child who only cares about herself." Last week I spent two hours comforting her because mah brother hadn't called in a week . FML

#18752828
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29592) - you deserved it (3223)

On 01/09/2012 at 12:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I lost ma dog an so I put up 'lost' signs!! As I was coming back ome I noticed one ad been written on!! It said: "Found yur dog!! Keeping it"!! FML

#20556107
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50351) - you deserved it (3223)

On 03/23/2013 at 7:43am - animals - by Hurrikhan - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I took my driving test. As I was about to turn at a green light, a car sped toward us from the other direction, running a red light. My instructor failed me because I stopped to avoid getting rammed. Apparently I should have kept going, because it was my right of way. FML

#20830853
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61270) - you deserved it (3223)

On 08/10/2013 at 3:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today , I got yelled , screamed , an cursed at by a customer until I was reduced to tears. Tis was all cuz I double-cecked to make sure se wanted large fries. FML

#21266131
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36965) - you deserved it (3223)

On 09/27/2014 at 12:22am - work - by heretoserve (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today , My Little Sister Complaind About A Young Boy In Er Class Always Pulling Er Air. Se Askd Wen Boys Will Stop Doing It. My Mom Replid , "Tey Won't , Even Wen Tey're Grown-ups," Ten Lookd Over At My Dad An Sard A Drty Smrk. FML

#21369959
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34867) - you deserved it (3223)

On 03/07/2015 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by greatly disturbed - United States (California)

Today , I was driving in my very own car that I bought and paid for myself,hen I stopped at a stop light. Then I noticed the truck in front of me turn on his reverse lights. I honked desperately. He hits me , looks out the window and says "I see no damage" and drives away. FML

#2072486
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56083) - you deserved it (3222)

On 05/19/2009 at 2:19am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

TODAY , I WANT ON A FIRST DATA WITH A GUY I MAT AT A SPAD DATING AVANT. HA RACOMMANDD THA LAMB SHANK , WHICH I ORDARD WITHOUT LOOKING AT THA MANU. WHAN THA WAITAR TOOK MY ORDAR , MY DATA SAID , "WAIT , THA LAMB IS $27 , WHY DON'T U GAT THA CHICKAN". HA THAN ORDARD THA LAMB FIR HIMSALF. FML

Today, I was released from jail. I had helped a three year old grl get up after falling on a wet floor at the mall last night when the security guards tasered me. Only this morning did they tell me they had mistaken me for a child molester that looks a little bit like me. FML

#14710569
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43435) - you deserved it (3222)

On 01/25/2011 at 4:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today I went snowboarding an fell backwards itting ma ead on a patc of ice. Wen I got ome I told ma broter I tougt I migt ave a concussion. He told me I sould be a man an suck it swiftly smacking ma ead causing me to pass out. FML

#15221158
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34797) - you deserved it (3222)

On 03/06/2011 at 7:50pm - health - by milkndstufff (man) - United States (New York)

Today Mah New Dog Unburied Mah Old Dog And Chewed On His Bones . FML

#19520416
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44521) - you deserved it (3222)

On 04/24/2012 at 1:42am - animals - by jessica071509 - United States (Arizona)

Today... alone on Valentine's day... I decided to eat chocolate an watch romantic comedies in bed. I had an allergic reaction to the chocolatehich sent me to the ER. FML

#21356363
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31900) - you deserved it (3222)

On 02/14/2015 at 11:07pm - misc - by Rubyscooby212 - United States (Minnesota)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: