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Today, my school had to make an official announcement that students were not permitted to go home due to Zayn Malik leaving One Direction because so many girls were claiming they couldn't focus on school with such a dramatic event occurring. FML

#21381783
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39244) - you deserved it (3377)

On 03/26/2015 at 9:20am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was snuggled in bed with my husband. He thought because my butt was twitching that I was trying to be frisky. So he slapped my ass hard in attempt to get something going. I was actually trying to hold in a huge fart because last night I had diarrhea. Apparently I still have it. FML

#7084392
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25754) - you deserved it (3376)

On 01/01/2010 at 3:23pm - intimacy - by Lovergirl (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I got invited out by friends for coffee after I broke up with my boyfriend. When I told my mom where I was going, she looked at me and said, "But you don't have friends. All your friends are pixels. Where are you really going?" FML

#6578691
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28017) - you deserved it (3376)

On 12/03/2009 at 1:12am - misc - by friendless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got all four of my wisdom teeth out. My mom didn't get my prescription for painkillers because she thought I'd get addicted. FML

#12188597
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45965) - you deserved it (3376)

On 07/29/2010 at 3:10pm - health - by Richmond24 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I confirmed that my neighbors burn their garbage in their backyard. How? My dog just threw up a nice smelly consistency of spaghetti, plastic and cigarette butts on my carpet. FML

#14954664
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22736) - you deserved it (3376)

On 02/13/2011 at 3:36am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I called my boyfriend over and over again and he never answered. His mom just called me and asked how I was holding up. I asked her what she meant and she had to tell me he checked himself into rehab because he was addicted to heroin. FML

#18708494
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33884) - you deserved it (3375)

On 01/04/2012 at 6:29pm - misc - by jada - United States (Ohio)

Today, some kids used firecrackers to blow up my mailbox. This is the third time this week. FML

#20961862
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38767) - you deserved it (3375)

On 11/18/2013 at 5:14am - kids - by kids next door - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I won a goldfish at the amusement park. My little brother took him out of the bowl because he thought he was drowning. FML

#21246787
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39331) - you deserved it (3375)

On 08/27/2014 at 10:33pm - kids - by That idiot - United States (Nevada)

Today, I learned that the excessive groin sweating I've been trying to deal with for weeks isn't groin sweating. It's a slow and steady stream of urine that I have no control over. FML

#5743316
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48486) - you deserved it (3374)

On 10/09/2009 at 5:25pm - health - by lizzzie (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, I went to my "not so technologically advanced" grandma's house to help her out with her computer. It appears she has very interesting conversations with the man who lives in the apartment above her. FML

#15061511
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28030) - you deserved it (3374)

On 02/21/2011 at 2:46am - intimacy - by Josie (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was driving my motorcycle, and I noticed someone was in the ditch, so I went to go help them. When the ambulance showed up, they ran over my bike, totaling it. FML

#16734603
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38234) - you deserved it (3374)

On 06/18/2011 at 9:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I ordered food at McDonald's. I'm on crutches, and a guy offered to carry my tray to the table. He rushed out with my food. FML

#18070361
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39507) - you deserved it (3374)

On 10/25/2011 at 4:17am - misc - by myownperson - United States (Colorado)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". FML

#20668913
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48097) - you deserved it (3374)

On 05/17/2013 at 11:52am - misc - by Sonofa - Canada (Alberta)



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