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Today, my boyfriend was such a coward that instead of breaking up with me, he changed his phone number. FML

#19193447
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28389) - you deserved it (3307)

On 03/01/2012 at 12:35am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I'm going to court to give an eyewitness account of a robbery. Unfortunately, I had a wacky dream last night concerning the robbery, and no longer have any idea of what actually happened in real life. FML

#19884306
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30354) - you deserved it (3307)

On 07/03/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by Dreamer (man) - United States (California)

Today, my friends decided it would be funny to scare me by tilting the portable street toilets while I was taking a dump in one of them. One of my friends accidentally rocked it too hard and it fell on the floor. They wouldn't even let me sit in the car after because I had shit all over me. FML

#2820229
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57905) - you deserved it (3306)

On 06/12/2009 at 12:44am - misc - by dontevenassk (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my friends and I went paintballing. The instructor showed us the sound of an unloaded gun by shooting at my face. It wasn't unloaded. FML

#21277056
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46386) - you deserved it (3306)

On 10/13/2014 at 5:33pm - health - by clumsylobster - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I learnt that the girl with who I've being going out for 6 months, has been sleeping with every guy around except one. Guess who? FML

#379
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39041) - you deserved it (3305)

On 11/24/2008 at 1:08am - love - by lectro - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boy friend said "you know who you remind me of? Sarah Palin." And then for the next 15 minutes continued to discuss how ugly she is. FML

#2401768
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47971) - you deserved it (3305)

On 05/29/2009 at 1:51pm - misc - by Jazzyfayyye (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after a week of not seeing each other, my boyfriend asked if he could come over and hang out. He only came because he ran out of food at his house. FML

#21355470
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30209) - you deserved it (3305)

On 02/13/2015 at 5:49pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had a sex dream, which I interrupted by having an OCD-induced panic attack because apparently we weren't using protection. My brain won't even let me enjoy the fantasy action I get in my sleep. FML

#20171880
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30407) - you deserved it (3304)

On 11/21/2012 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Dead_Fox (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I found out after spending my life's income on paying for my grandma's cancer treatment that she has been faking it. FML

#20859354
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56339) - you deserved it (3304)

On 08/29/2013 at 2:48pm - health - by scammed (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my Breaking Bad obsessed boyfriend actually used the phrase "I am the one who cocks." during foreplay. My vagina just about turned into a desert on the spot. FML

#21347719
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30419) - you deserved it (3304)

On 02/01/2015 at 11:17am - intimacy - by SKYYYLLLARRRR!!!! (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to the allergist. I found out that I am allergic to dogs, cats, wool, fleece, and pet dander. I'm currently planning to go to school to become a veterinarian. FML

#6054413
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37641) - you deserved it (3303)

On 10/29/2009 at 12:36pm - work - by KMack (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, while sleeping over at my guy friend's house, I woke up mid-air after falling off his abnormally high loft bed. Luckily, there was a table and 3 shot glasses to break my fall. FML

#6668848
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22456) - you deserved it (3303)

On 12/08/2009 at 7:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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