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Today, my boss - AKA Satan - told me I'd better watch out, because I'm now top on his list of people to lay off next time the company downsizes. All I did was give a report to the board admitting that our sales are down this year. He blames me for making him look bad. FML

#21086597
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36235) - you deserved it (3416)

On 03/14/2014 at 3:40pm - work - by fucked (man) - Canada

Today, it was report card day at swimming lessons. Because it was the last day, a little girl brought me flowers. She was the only kid in that class who didn't pass. FML

#21251459
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40080) - you deserved it (3416)

On 09/03/2014 at 9:31pm - work - by anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I learned I'm allergic to the 5-month-old kitten we got 3 days ago. It loves me, follows me everywhere and sleeps on my lap in the evenings. FML

#21310909
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32629) - you deserved it (3416)

On 12/03/2014 at 6:24pm - animals - by crazy cat lady - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I received the box my parents sent me for my birthday. Contents were a travel first-aid kit, and a remote control robot toy, with an age recommendation on the box of 8. I'm 29. They thought that since I'm an engineer I would like the toy. They also think I'll hurt myself with it. FML

#2929897
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37879) - you deserved it (3415)

On 06/16/2009 at 12:39am - misc - by JustAGiftCardPlease (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my best friend informed me that I could not be her maid of honour because I "wasn't as pretty as the other bridesmaids" and she wanted her wedding photos to have "consistency". FML

#4914313
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51152) - you deserved it (3415)

On 08/29/2009 at 8:39pm - misc - by deadmedia (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, the job search agency that I use asked me to stop sending in my resume, as no one had hired me in three years, and that the situation was unlikely to change. FML

#17862767
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25400) - you deserved it (3415)

On 09/29/2011 at 10:32am - work - by crushed (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was delivering pizzas for my summer job. I got a big order to deliver for a fellow graduate's party. While I was being paid for the order my friend shows up and says "Don't pay him, his parents are rich, he can handle it." Then they shut the door and took off. The bill was $75. FML

#3100953
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51483) - you deserved it (3414)

On 06/21/2009 at 8:37pm - work - by blahpizzablah (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was in the elevator with my female coworker and a very attractive teen in front of us. My coworker reached out and grabbed the boobs of the teen in front of us, and blamed it on me. I got yelled at, kneed in the crotch, and punched in the face. My coworker couldn't stop laughing. FML

#14416914
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33666) - you deserved it (3414)

On 01/01/2011 at 12:06am - work - by Chris - United States (Illinois)

Today, and ever since I was born, I've had a lazy eye. This morning my boyfriend broke up with me. He thought it was funny to state that we just weren't looking at life in the same way. FML

#14608702
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34435) - you deserved it (3414) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - love - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend asked me what he should get his mother for her birthday. FML

#20011729
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28272) - you deserved it (3414)

On 08/09/2012 at 4:16pm - intimacy - by Badkitty14 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went for a jog. While passing by my neighbor's house, their six year old son started throwing peanuts at me screaming, "I hope this kills you!" because I'm allergic to peanuts. FML

#4820623
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54314) - you deserved it (3413)

On 08/25/2009 at 8:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I told my girlfriend that her mom doesn't give us any privacy when we're at their place. I suggested that we go to my place for a change, and she agreed. Her mom called my house three times to see what we were doing. We're well beyond teenagers. FML

#4992541
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42879) - you deserved it (3413)

On 09/02/2009 at 1:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, someone broke into my car to steal $1.50. FML

#10908235
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32583) - you deserved it (3413)

On 06/01/2010 at 2:47pm - money - by Brokeashell - United States



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