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Today, I ran into a former co-worker who I hadn't seen in years. She was raving at how I hadn't aged a bit, but before I could thank her she said, "But, you know, chubby people age better." FML

#20492811
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26647) - you deserved it (3271)

On 02/04/2013 at 7:17am - work - by Colleen Nichols - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had the pleasure of driving in central London for the first time, to recover my drunk husband from his own brilliance, puking on the feet of Winston Churchill's statue in Parliament Square. At 4 am. FML

#20944193
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37071) - you deserved it (3271)

On 11/03/2013 at 5:53pm - love - by I am not amused! (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I was studying for my Spanish midterm nonstop. After I closed my book, I was so tired that I thought that my cat was asking me questions in Spanish. FML

#21303629
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28535) - you deserved it (3271)

On 11/21/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Studying is for crazy people. - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of four years broke up with me over some rumors he heard about me. These rumors are from high-school, seven years ago. FML

#21297338
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35851) - you deserved it (3271)

On 11/11/2014 at 10:31pm - love - by ugh - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I came home from a rough day working two jobs to find a plate of cookies on my desk with a note from my roommates saying, "You deserve it!" I happily broke one in half to eat and discovered they contained coconut. I'm allergic to coconut, a fact both of my roommates are aware of. FML

#20521168
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31113) - you deserved it (3270)

On 02/25/2013 at 12:44am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was fired on my second day of work after a year and a half of unemployment. Apparently, my "tendency to solve problems instead of just accepting them made the other workers uneasy". FML

#20617597
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49425) - you deserved it (3270)

On 04/24/2013 at 12:55am - work - by anonymous (man) - Germany

Today, while clearing stuff out of the basement, I found my ex-wife's old electronic diary device from the '90s. I found the charger, powered it up, and had soon read all about out she'd been cheating on me for almost half our marriage with the guy she's now married to. FML

#21313160
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38480) - you deserved it (3270)

On 12/07/2014 at 2:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Galway)

Today, while visiting family in the Czech Republic, I was told on two separate occasions that I looked like a Czech TV star. Flattered, I asked what the TV show was called. Turns out there's a Czech version of 'Ugly Betty'. FML

#4278303
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37292) - you deserved it (3269)

On 08/04/2009 at 9:19am - misc - by CzechMeOut (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I went out with a guy I really liked for the first time. He tried to hold my hands, only to be stopped by my mum, jumping out from nowhere saying "Oh no you don't!" before slapping him. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

#17827987
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40772) - you deserved it (3269)

On 09/25/2011 at 6:26am - love - by Anonymous - Singapore

Today, my mother asked me why I disliked her and my father's nakedness in the family pool. FML

#21129038
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38760) - you deserved it (3269)

On 05/02/2014 at 7:03pm - misc - by nopleasestopmother (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while showering in my dorm, a hand reaches through the curtain and grabs my ass. I hit the person on the other side of the curtain. He opened the curtain thinking that I was his girlfriend. He apologized and he had sex with his girlfriend in the shower stall next to me. FML

#268539
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71105) - you deserved it (3268)

On 03/11/2009 at 3:37am - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend of 6 months broke up with me because he felt "our religious differences kept us apart." We've never talked about anything religious. Ever. FML

#13008973
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24903) - you deserved it (3268)

On 09/11/2010 at 8:39pm - love - by fmlimoverit - United States (Ohio)

Today, I met my father for the first time since I was a baby. The first comment out of his mouth was, "I bet all the boys love those motherfucking bazongas, don't they?" Hi, Dad. FML

#14396481
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42451) - you deserved it (3268)

On 12/30/2010 at 2:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (York)



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