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Today, my grandmother updated her will. Previously, it denied inheritance to family members with non-white spouses, and any mixed-raced children. Now it does the same with politically correct terminology. She then bragged about how accepting she is in front of my Korean husband and our daughter. FML

#17336031
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31753) - you deserved it (3335)

On 08/01/2011 at 8:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after a great treadmill run at my gym, I noticed a stain on my clothing. Apparently my nipple chafed so badly that it bled through my white t-shirt, and I'd walked around the gym completely oblivious. FML

#17898016
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25793) - you deserved it (3335)

On 10/03/2011 at 7:19pm - health - by sorenips - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my daughter had the words "Always classy, never trashy" tattooed across her lower back in crappy cursive lettering. She doesn't understand the irony. FML

#20400337
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31933) - you deserved it (3335)

On 12/15/2012 at 3:08am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I woke up without my fiancé in bed next to me, but I assumed he'd gone to work early. I went on Facebook to find that he had posted a break-up post to himself from my account and set my status to single. I then found a note with "Sorry" written on it stuck to the kitchen counter. FML

#20663501
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54353) - you deserved it (3335)

On 05/14/2013 at 6:41pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my girlfriend tried explaining a duck flying into our living room and taking a shit everywhere as "paranormal activity". FML

#20963751
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37539) - you deserved it (3335)

On 11/19/2013 at 8:09pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I asked my father for some help paying my college tuition. He told me he'd help me after I become more accredited than he is. My father has 2 PHDs. I'm studying to be an elementary school teacher. FML

#6255199
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27459) - you deserved it (3334)

On 11/11/2009 at 7:47am - misc - by Stupidteach (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML

#20490582
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48167) - you deserved it (3334)

On 02/02/2013 at 6:03pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Belgium

Today, I managed to convince my sister that when you press down the diet button on the lid of a McDonald's cup it turns whatever is in there diet. I pressed the button and she started shouting how she hates diet drinks. She's 19. FML

#21292789
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29003) - you deserved it (3334)

On 11/05/2014 at 4:25pm - misc - by aineroo (woman) - Ireland (Galway)

Today, I got a call from my parents' divorce lawyer. When I answered the phone, she thought I was my mother and told me the details about my parent's divorce. I'm a 13-year-old boy who sounds like a woman and just learned that my parents are separating. FML

#4374791
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61588) - you deserved it (3333)

On 08/07/2009 at 11:57pm - misc - by madaskueuchiha (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to listen to a girl who just came back from the bathroom, talk about the "gigantic massive dump" she took, and even held her hands up to show the size. FML

#8835059
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21800) - you deserved it (3333)

On 03/04/2010 at 10:51pm - misc - by Grossed_out (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I asked my boss for a raise. He gave me a cupcake. FML

#19235270
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21316) - you deserved it (3333)

On 03/07/2012 at 8:08pm - work - by Janitor (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, my pre-teen brother has started using the entire Axe line because he believes that it will give him an "edge with the ladies". He insists on using the products at least three times a day, including before bedtime. I'm allergic to anything that is perfumed. We share a room. FML

#20790014
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48681) - you deserved it (3333)

On 07/18/2013 at 5:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my 16-year-old cousin came to visit for the week. So far, she's said "raunchy", "cray-cray", "legit", and "like" an uncountable number of times. She's only been here for a half hour. FML

#20881272
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40111) - you deserved it (3333)

On 09/14/2013 at 5:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)



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