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Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me because she found a bra in my cupboard. It was hers. FML

#5389854
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41796) - you deserved it (3306)

On 09/21/2009 at 6:53am - love - by Wronged (man) - Singapore

Today, my fiancée and I were selecting our wedding cake. The wedding is now off since I refused to buy her the "dream" wedding cake she wanted because it was chocolate. She called me childish and cheap. I'm highly allergic to chocolate. FML

#8642847
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39128) - you deserved it (3306)

On 02/25/2010 at 4:47pm - misc - by Ringless - United States (Virginia)

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend because he's been working extra hard these last two months. I went to his house only to find him in bed with another girl. Standing there, with fifteen roses in my hands, all he could say was, "Thank you, can you put them in a vase?" FML

#13497431
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39861) - you deserved it (3306)

On 10/18/2010 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML

#20624598
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52463) - you deserved it (3306)

On 04/27/2013 at 4:28am - misc - by whathehell (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my morbidly obese mother gave me an angry lecture at dinner, saying without any trace of irony that my vegetarian diet is "unhealthy and utterly unacceptable". FML

#21388006
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29967) - you deserved it (3306)

On 04/05/2015 at 11:38am - misc - by tardspawn (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, my friends decided it would be funny to scare me by tilting the portable street toilets while I was taking a dump in one of them. One of my friends accidentally rocked it too hard and it fell on the floor. They wouldn't even let me sit in the car after because I had shit all over me. FML

#2820229
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57877) - you deserved it (3305)

On 06/12/2009 at 12:44am - misc - by dontevenassk (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my garage was flooded. Everything was ruined. My garage also happens to be my study, in which my entire art coursework was drying. My exam is tomorrow and all I have to hand in is a pile of mushy paper. FML

#16042714
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30828) - you deserved it (3305)

On 05/04/2011 at 9:47am - work - by lottielondon (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I learnt that the girl with who I've being going out for 6 months, has been sleeping with every guy around except one. Guess who? FML

#379
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38988) - you deserved it (3304)

On 11/24/2008 at 1:08am - love - by lectro - Sent from mobile version

Today, my three-year-old decided to dump the entire contents of her cereal box onto the kitchen floor because she was looking for a "prize." The only prize we found was a huge dead cockroach, which she promptly stuck in her mouth. FML

#6013490
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32344) - you deserved it (3304)

On 10/26/2009 at 8:42pm - kids - by laxie (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after months of teaching my parrot to speak, he finally demonstrated his abilities. I accidentally set off my smoke detector, and he's been wailing like a dying banshee ever since. FML

#19260934
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22007) - you deserved it (3304)

On 03/11/2012 at 11:04pm - animals - by weep weep weep (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boy friend said "you know who you remind me of? Sarah Palin." And then for the next 15 minutes continued to discuss how ugly she is. FML

#2401768
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47945) - you deserved it (3303)

On 05/29/2009 at 1:51pm - misc - by Jazzyfayyye (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had a sex dream, which I interrupted by having an OCD-induced panic attack because apparently we weren't using protection. My brain won't even let me enjoy the fantasy action I get in my sleep. FML

#20171880
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30373) - you deserved it (3303)

On 11/21/2012 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Dead_Fox (man) - United States (Arkansas)



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