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Today, my mother dragged me into Victoria's Secret to get my opinion on some lingerie. Lingerie she'll be using to get into my dad's pants this evening. FML

#14731317
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25823) - you deserved it (2504)

On 01/27/2011 at 12:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams to come over for a movie. When I answered the door, my little brother ran up behind me, yelled "geronimo" and pulled down my pants and underwear. FML

#19615713
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25316) - you deserved it (2504)

On 05/13/2012 at 8:15am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that my dad is actually my uncle, and vice-versa. FML

#20994621
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50670) - you deserved it (2504)

On 12/16/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by confsused - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a coworker introduced herself to me and told me she hopes I enjoy my new job. We've worked in the same building for two years. I say hello every time I see her. FML

#15869233
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26750) - you deserved it (2503)

On 04/21/2011 at 1:27am - work - by Forgetable (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, a state trooper ticketed me after learning I was ticketed for the same offense an hour earlier, namely driving with a broken headlight. The good news is that both tickets will be dismissed if I go to court. The bad news is that I'd have to go to different courthouses at the same time of day. FML

#20494464
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23138) - you deserved it (2503)

On 02/05/2013 at 1:59pm - money - by halfmypaycheckgone (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my family and I went on a picnic in the park 45 minutes drive away from our house. I fell asleep beneath a tree. They left me there. FML

#5645796
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32040) - you deserved it (2502)

On 10/04/2009 at 5:33pm - misc - by walker (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boss sent me to a meeting with a client I've never met to do some damage control and renegotiate his contract. For two hours, he alternated between threatening to sue us, and making vulgar comments about raping me in his office. FML

#13962555
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30729) - you deserved it (2502)

On 11/24/2010 at 2:34pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend has been cheating on me by finding orange panties in my closet. His excuse was "they're a Christmas gift." Thanks honey, I get panties that won't fit, and have little brown streaks. FML

#14022422
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31877) - you deserved it (2502)

On 11/29/2010 at 10:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I was in a parking lot looking for a spot, and after driving around for a long while I finally found one. A homeless man was taking a shit on it. FML

#16097494
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23145) - you deserved it (2502)

On 05/08/2011 at 9:53pm - misc - by jackpot - Venezuela

Today, I was called ugly and viciously ridiculed by a couple of teenage girls. They were wearing uggs and vests that made them look like a freak-show of bleached pomeranians. FML

#18111338
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25639) - you deserved it (2502)

On 10/30/2011 at 12:57pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I visited my family. Over the course of 2 hours, my brother punched me, and my mom slapped me across the face after drinking way too much wine. When I started gathering my things to leave, my mom started crying about how I don't visit enough. FML

#20474780
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30247) - you deserved it (2502)

On 01/23/2013 at 12:45pm - misc - by mariama (woman) - United States

Today, at a family gathering, my aunt asked me when I was planning to have children. I'm only 16, I laughed and said not for a while, definitely not until I get married. My family shook their heads, and ignored me for the rest of the day. Apparently, teenage pregnancy is valued in my family. FML

#4555505
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53989) - you deserved it (2501)

On 08/15/2009 at 7:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I overheard my mother telling a friend she got me oven mitts for Christmas. I got her two cruise tickets. I hate to cook. Which she knows. FML

#14066862
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22609) - you deserved it (2501)

On 12/03/2010 at 12:18am - misc - by nokitchenforme - Canada (Ontario)



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