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Today, my boyfriend was such a coward that instead of breaking up with me, he changed his phone number. FML

#19193447
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26385) - you deserved it (3132)

On 03/01/2012 at 12:35am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I took a week off work because my father passed away. I was at the funeral home making arrangements when I overheard the owners complaining about how their insurance agent had left them to fend for themselves. I'm their insurance agent. FML

#20531557
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28007) - you deserved it (3132)

On 03/04/2013 at 10:38pm - work - by KathleenSchuler - United States

Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML

#6207441
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30641) - you deserved it (3131)

On 11/08/2009 at 2:26am - animals - by birdbath (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while socializing after a church service, I discovered I'm still referred to as "Fireshit's brother", after an incident a year ago which involved my sister screaming "the devil is coming out of my anus!" from the lavatory. FML

#14330238
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28941) - you deserved it (3131)

On 12/25/2010 at 1:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, my dad thought it would be OK to make sound effects for everything he did, in a public park, with me tagging along behind. FML

#17078308
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22162) - you deserved it (3131)

On 07/12/2011 at 8:19am - kids - by SaggyBoy135 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my friends staged an intervention. I'm not on drugs, I'm not an alcoholic, and I own my own house. My car is paid for and my job pays well. Apparently, I need an intervention because my life is not where they want it to be, which involves me being married with children. FML

#17004757
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35548) - you deserved it (3132)

On 07/06/2011 at 7:43pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend discovered that I fart when I'm tickled enough. The best part was when he decided to show his family. FML

#18393889
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29269) - you deserved it (3131)

On 11/30/2011 at 12:55pm - misc - by Madi - United States (California)

Today, while visiting my mother, she asked my son who his favorite parent was. As a growing boy, he chose his father. I don't mind, except she then asked, "So, whose side are you taking in the divorce?" My husband and I have no marital issues. My son refuses to believe us. FML

#20932049
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41976) - you deserved it (3131)

On 10/24/2013 at 2:05am - kids - by he's still not convinced (woman) - United States

Today, I googled myself in preparation for my upcoming job interview. Turns out there's a girl on Twitter with my name and age who tweets nonstop about getting wasted and being on probation. She won't make her profile private. FML

#20944947
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43887) - you deserved it (3131)

On 11/04/2013 at 7:08am - work - by twitterfailsme (woman) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, while visiting family in the Czech Republic, I was told on two separate occasions that I looked like a Czech TV star. Flattered, I asked what the TV show was called. Turns out there's a Czech version of 'Ugly Betty'. FML

#4278303
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35862) - you deserved it (3130)

On 08/04/2009 at 9:19am - misc - by CzechMeOut (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out less than 3 weeks before my wedding my fiancé will lose his new, great paying job unless we cancel our nonrefundable honeymoon. FML

#13263221
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32318) - you deserved it (3130)

On 09/30/2010 at 1:14pm - love - by no luck - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dad finally told me why he never paid child support to my mom when he was supposed to for the last ten years. His reason? Because I'm a girl and I wasn't that important. FML

#13397111
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31176) - you deserved it (3130)

On 10/10/2010 at 8:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I opened my new clothing store. My only customer was my mom and the only reason she came in was to tell me that someone stole my sign. FML

#16307240
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34444) - you deserved it (3130)

On 05/23/2011 at 12:26am - work - by 11lyss1 -



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