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Today, my fiancé and I met his mother for lunch to discuss wedding plans. When we got there, I went to the bathroom to wash my hands. I heard a woman talking on her cell phone in the stall about her son's "disgusting, slutty girlfriend." The toilet flushed and my future mother-in-law walked out. FML

#5940105
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39709) - you deserved it (3017)

On 10/22/2009 at 1:53am - love - by uneek_3225 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I found out my new Commanding Officer is my ex-wife's new boyfriend. We're going on a two year tour at sea in two weeks. The reason we got a divorce is that she couldn't handle being tied down with someone in the Navy. FML

#16882996
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46424) - you deserved it (3017)

On 06/27/2011 at 3:20pm - love - by Drunken Sailor - United States (New York)

Today, when I excitedly announced to my mother-in-law that I was pregnant, she looked at me with a blank expression and asked me who the father was. She's 45. She's not senile or suffering from dementia, but apparently just suffering from being a chronic bitch. FML

#18834443
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34638) - you deserved it (3017)

On 01/17/2012 at 12:04pm - misc - by littlelottie - United States (Florida)

Today, I had a big argument with my girlfriend, after she tried to stop me going home, even though it was already past my curfew. I got home, only to find out I'm grounded for staying out late, and dumped for being "inconsiderate". FML

#20104336
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21690) - you deserved it (3017)

On 10/06/2012 at 2:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Philippines (Rizal)

Today, my girlfriend claimed she was a Viking because she's pale and has blond hair. She also warned me that if I piss her off she'll go 'berserk' on me. She demonstrated by smacking me in the nuts with a wooden spoon. FML

#20167650
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21567) - you deserved it (3017)

On 11/18/2012 at 2:45am - love - by jasmith - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband woke up, rolled over, and said, "Good morning, beautiful." He hasn't called me that in months, but as I was about to reply, I realized he was talking to his pet turtle, not me. FML

#20549421
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37103) - you deserved it (3017)

On 03/18/2013 at 3:38pm - love - by Maggie - United States

Today, my mom decided to follow me during my driving test. She rear ended me. FML

#21092226
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41933) - you deserved it (3017)

On 03/20/2014 at 11:04pm - misc - by nehadrihan - United States (California)

Today, I was in the change room at the local YMCA. I went to use the hair dryer but couldn't because a naked old man was bent over, butt cheeks spread wide with his hands, and ass aimed at the dryer. He seemed to be enjoying it. FML

#216994
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52105) - you deserved it (3016)

On 03/05/2009 at 1:45pm - misc - by nuberific (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at an Aunt's wake, my five year old son walked up to the coffin, and, with the whole family around him, exclaimed, "Well that's good, I was wondering where she's been." FML

#13635730
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27095) - you deserved it (3016)

On 10/29/2010 at 4:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered that every morning at around 3:00 my dad takes a monumental dump in my bathroom. When I confronted him about it he denied it. He still does it. FML

#17394745
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21699) - you deserved it (3016)

On 08/07/2011 at 4:08am - misc - by fugachumi - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend texted me and said I had forgotten my blue bra. I don't have any blue bras. FML

#18534349
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39595) - you deserved it (3016)

On 12/17/2011 at 8:17am - love - by fmll - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my boyfriend of 3 months broke up with me because he is moving. He's only moving 20 minutes away. FML

#19381159
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26094) - you deserved it (3016)

On 03/31/2012 at 8:22am - love - by swim5 - United States (Arizona)

Today, my dog wanted to go upstairs, but she has stitches and was having trouble. So I carried her to the top, at which point she peed all over my carpet. FML

#19211891
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19658) - you deserved it (3016)

On 03/04/2012 at 12:51am - animals - by raven_teen_titan - United States (California)



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