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Today, I found out that my stalker ex-girlfriend named her new born son after me. FML

#17794900
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35576) - you deserved it (3216)

On 09/21/2011 at 10:44am - love - by cjy152 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I came back from a two week vacation. As I walked in the door, my boyfriend greeted me with a "Hey, honey! Could you clean the crockpot?" It still had the chicken in it from my going away dinner. FML

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I met at a speed dating event. He recommended the lamb shank, which I ordered without looking at the menu. When the waiter took my order, my date said, "wait, the lamb is $27, why don't you get the chicken". He then ordered the lamb for himself. FML

Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me because she found a bra in my cupboard. It was hers. FML

#5389854
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40589) - you deserved it (3215)

On 09/21/2009 at 6:53am - love - by Wronged (man) - Singapore

Today, I was at volleyball tryouts when I accidentally spiked the ball into the fire alarm. The fire fighters did not look happy when they found out what had happened. So much for being on the team. FML

#13187772
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20211) - you deserved it (3216)

On 09/24/2010 at 9:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at a concert and a man came up behind and started to grind me. I pushed him away. He came back and pissed on my leg. FML

#19315463
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28197) - you deserved it (3215)

On 03/20/2012 at 6:27pm - misc - by Laura - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, my new dog unburied my old dog and chewed on his bones. FML

#19520416
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44419) - you deserved it (3215)

On 04/24/2012 at 1:42am - animals - by jessica071509 - United States (Arizona)

Today, after math class, the resident creepy kid approached me and asked me out. I've only spoken to him twice before, so I was creeped out, and I politely declined. He totally lost it, and shouted that I'm a "friend-zoning bitch" before storming out of the room. FML

#20072034
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22206) - you deserved it (3215)

On 09/14/2012 at 8:03pm - love - by wow kid just leave me alone (woman) - United States

Today, my grandpa moved into the house to live with my family. Along with having to share a room with him, he swears that having the AC on will give him pneumonia, and he keeps saying he's "freezing" when the temperature inside gets below 85. We live in Nevada. FML

#20656847
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42919) - you deserved it (3215)

On 05/11/2013 at 5:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I got into my driving instructors car for my first lesson. He looked at me, then said, "I'm sorry, but I wasn't told about your disabilities, what do you have?" I'm not disabled. FML

#1694606
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57732) - you deserved it (3214)

On 05/06/2009 at 4:09pm - misc - by wow. (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years asked my dad if he could marry me, and my dad agreed. He then tells me that he's not going to propose for maybe another year at least, he "just wanted to get that out of the way." FML

#18610596
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27690) - you deserved it (3214)

On 12/25/2011 at 8:28pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I kicked my dog's toy snake out of my way. Then I realised my dog doesn't have a toy snake. FML

#19342755
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29753) - you deserved it (3214)

On 03/25/2012 at 1:49am - animals - by uh-oh - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up at 3:00 am feeling freezing cold and soaking wet. It turns out that my dad had opened my window when I was sleeping, and rain water had been pouring in on me all night. My hair, face, pillow, blankets, alarm clock, and homework were all soaked as well. FML

#20722563
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46637) - you deserved it (3214)

On 06/12/2013 at 10:40pm - misc - by Anon - Canada (Ontario)



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  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

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