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Today, a cute guy ditched his date and walked up to me, calling me beautiful. Not knowing how to reply, I just blushed. His date got angry and left. "Sorry. I take that back," he then said. "I was just trying to get rid of her. Thanks anyway." FML

#20906907
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49846) - you deserved it (3256)

On 10/04/2013 at 5:37am - love - by okaythen (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, I was selling winter-themed cookies at my university. I cheerfully asked a girl if she would like to buy cookies to support peer tutoring. Her response? "I don't eat food." FML

#21303227
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30444) - you deserved it (3256)

On 11/21/2014 at 8:51am - misc - by UTRejected (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I caught my cat humping my dog while he was asleep. I'm sleeping with the door closed from now on. FML

#497
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32290) - you deserved it (3254)

On 12/11/2008 at 10:31pm - intimacy - by Black - Lebanon (Beqaa)

Today, my fiancé told my mom that she screwed me up. I now have to write an apologetic e-mail to her for something that I agree with, in order for her to stop calling me crying. FML

#5847291
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20843) - you deserved it (3254)

On 10/15/2009 at 11:36pm - misc - by sighoutloud (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out that the reason why my boyfriend has a chipped tooth is because his teeth hit another girl's teeth while kissing her. FML

#12913788
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28111) - you deserved it (3254)

On 09/05/2010 at 4:14am - love - by ohmydog (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend of five years proposed to me in front of my entire family. He later confessed that it was part of a dare with his friends because, "There was no way you'd say yes." Guess who has to explain this to all my relatives? FML

#16882542
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40498) - you deserved it (3254)

On 06/27/2011 at 2:38pm - love - by mavstrr1764847 - United States (Colorado)

Today, while at Six Flags my boyfriend won a huge stuffed animal for me. After a whole day of carrying it around, when he dropped me off he told me that he wants the stuffed animal back. He just didn't want to carry it around all day. FML

#17950991
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34407) - you deserved it (3254)

On 10/10/2011 at 9:56am - misc - by Username - United States (Texas)

Today, I was having a chat with a customer. He asked if I was married, to which I replied, "No." Before I could say anything else, he said, "Thought so. You look too happy to be married." I was about to mention that I just got engaged. FML

#17513868
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25944) - you deserved it (3254)

On 08/18/2011 at 10:10pm - love - by ddeit (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML

#19942412
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35344) - you deserved it (3253)

On 07/15/2012 at 7:13pm - kids - by Zora (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my mother and I were discussing how we couldn't believe it's been nearly a year since my dad died. Not paying attention, my husband absentmindedly added, "Time flies when you're having fun." FML

#20804154
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44285) - you deserved it (3253)

On 07/26/2013 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had to show a new student around my school. Normally, that wouldn't be such a bad thing, but the student was my crazy, overly-attached ex. I transferred schools to get away from her in the first place. FML

#21108356
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43054) - you deserved it (3253)

On 04/09/2014 at 8:37am - misc - by not_this_shit_again (man) - Singapore

Today, my 6-year-old brother showed me the "books" he's been writing for the past week. My parents, who are first-generation immigrants, want him to take the books to school to show everyone. My only problem with this? The main character's name is "Wanker". FML

#21195314
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36204) - you deserved it (3253)

On 07/01/2014 at 5:41pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I returned home from college and saw a framed picture of my parents and my younger sister on an elephant in an exotic jungle. I pointed to the picture and asked my mom, "Is this some photoshop job?" She responded, "No, we went to Thailand for a family trip, didn't we tell you?" FML

#86332
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70953) - you deserved it (3252)

On 02/20/2009 at 4:24am - misc - by OutoftheLoop (woman) - China (Beijing)



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