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Today, I was delivering pizza in the rain. A woman answered the door, saw me soaking wet and said, "Wow this rain is terrible, it must be horrible to be out delivering in it." She then tipped me 21 cents. FML

#14391490
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28228) - you deserved it (3504)

On 12/30/2010 at 2:48am - work - by ronniewciv -

Today, I spent almost $200 on a planetarium show with my boyfriend, who loves astronomy. He said his favorite thing about it was that he could pick his nose without anyone noticing. FML

#17904030
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27332) - you deserved it (3504)

On 10/04/2011 at 2:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my wackjob roommate decided to sit next to me on the couch, basically make out with her pet rabbit, and baby-talk to it. Key highlights involved giggling while the bunny licked up inside her nose and then commenting on the rabbit's "pronounced nipples". Why? FML

#20848347
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39117) - you deserved it (3504)

On 08/21/2013 at 8:09pm - animals - by Jade (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my grandma has been running around the neighborhood, dressed as Bobo the Evil Clown, chasing trick-or-treaters. All I've been able to do is chase after her, and apologize to the terrified children's families. FML

#20941017
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39553) - you deserved it (3504)

On 11/01/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by bobosgonnagetyou - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to accept the fact that I'm going bald, after I noticed the hair on my chest is longer than the hair on my head. FML

#21037094
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36945) - you deserved it (3504)

On 01/23/2014 at 12:13pm - health - by Hairy_Potter (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, I asked my boss for a few days off next week, because my grandmother passed away yesterday and I'll need to travel to attend the funeral. His response: "She's dead, you're not. You want time off, then quit." FML

#21080680
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56258) - you deserved it (3504)

On 03/07/2014 at 5:31pm - misc - by GLHan (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went on a trip to Cleveland. After getting lunch, my brother and I started walking back to my car. Halfway there, we were jumped, threatened with a knife, and yelled at to hand over our money. The only thing my brother could do was ask our mugger, "Uh, what gender are you?" FML

#21098906
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39499) - you deserved it (3504)

On 03/28/2014 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I learned that my boyfriend waits 'til I am asleep to wack off to porn on the internet. We haven't had sex in months because he doesn't want to. FML

#7158529
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21935) - you deserved it (3503)

On 01/05/2010 at 2:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was told that all the data on my laptop is unrecoverable after my hard drive crashed. I have been charged £300 for them to tell me this. Feeling sorry for myself, I wrapped myself up in a blanket and turned on my fan radiator as it's so cold... and promptly set my carpet on fire. FML

#13600670
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28041) - you deserved it (3503)

On 10/26/2010 at 9:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, my mother dragged me into Victoria's Secret to get my opinion on some lingerie. Lingerie she'll be using to get into my dad's pants this evening. FML

#14731317
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34129) - you deserved it (3503)

On 01/27/2011 at 12:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I took a 40 minute bus ride home from work. The first 20 minutes were spent listening to the drunk man behind me moan uncontrollably and belch. The last 20 minutes were spent trying to ignore the vomit he left on my back as he got up to leave. FML

#16067039
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36268) - you deserved it (3503)

On 05/06/2011 at 11:47am - misc - by eewww (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out the bed I sleep in is the bed I was conceived in. FML

Today, I went to the store to buy a phone I saw last week. I looked around a little first, then continued to the electronics section. I couldn't find the phone I saw, so I went to leave. Halfway to the exit, I was detained by security and grilled for ages over my "suspicious behaviour". FML

#21104459
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36679) - you deserved it (3503)

On 04/04/2014 at 3:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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