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Today, I went on a date with a respectable, successful, polite, and attractive guy. Ten minutes into the conversation, I find out he's a neo-Nazi and earned a swastika tattoo in prison for "something shady." FML

#17949951
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28342) - you deserved it (3095)

On 10/10/2011 at 3:16am - love - by thatgirl - United States (Texas)

Today, it was my birthday. I only got one message, from my dad, which was a sexual image meant for my mother. FML

#21110643
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43421) - you deserved it (3095)

On 04/11/2014 at 9:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I went to a coworker's wedding. Instead of getting to celebrate their marriage, we spent most of the service being lectured by the priest on how women are a freak by-product of "God's masterpiece design" and are the cause of all the world's problems. FML

#21233096
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35941) - you deserved it (3095)

On 08/09/2014 at 4:56am - misc - by Anonymous - Malawi

Today, seconds after my mom put my yorkie onto my bed, he threw up. His head was not fully over the bed itself, so the wet chunks fell straight into my backpack onto my new school books. FML

#12625429
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25013) - you deserved it (3095)

On 08/19/2010 at 1:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my parents fought over who gets the dog when they divorce. Nothing has been said about where my brother and I will live when they split. FML

#15379189
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36328) - you deserved it (3094)

On 03/19/2011 at 5:25am - animals - by unwanted (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I applied for a dental insurance that claims "you cannot be denied". I was denied. FML

#16464062
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29459) - you deserved it (3094)

On 06/02/2011 at 3:26am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend was flying his toy helicopter at my head. It got stuck in my hair and I now have a bald patch. FML

#18939799
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24812) - you deserved it (3094)

On 01/29/2012 at 1:31am - misc - by honey soy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my mom went to the store. She said she was feeling generous, and had gotten everyone a little treat. My brothers each got candy and a movie. I got acne medication. FML

#19001319
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24337) - you deserved it (3094)

On 02/05/2012 at 1:49pm - misc - by CaityLovesBo - United States (Washington)

Today, I got a cramp while swimming. It took the lifeguard 5 minutes to stop flirting with a girl before trying to help me. FML

#19850221
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23842) - you deserved it (3094)

On 06/26/2012 at 11:08am - misc - by EdgardoP - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while I was babysitting, the little girl wanted to show me a picture that her mom had just sent to the family iPad via iMessage. Trying to be helpful, I clicked iMessage, only to see pictures of her father's erect penis. She won't stop asking about the "hotdog" in the picture. FML

#20509000
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32622) - you deserved it (3094)

On 02/16/2013 at 1:03am - kids - by Scarlett (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I called my husband during my lunch to tell him that I wanted to go out tonight for my birthday. We got in argument because he said we couldn't afford it. When I got home from work, he was gone, so I called his cell to see where he went. Answer: to the bar with his friends. FML

#5476343
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40871) - you deserved it (3093)

On 09/25/2009 at 11:15pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, the boy I like finally acknowledged me. He came up to me and uttered two words: "Nice pooper." FML

#9097770
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18842) - you deserved it (3093)

On 03/15/2010 at 5:14am - intimacy - by shygurl434 - United States (Alaska)

Today, my ex fiancée, who left me six months ago, asked if I'd mind if she used the wedding dress I bought her for our wedding. She's just gotten engaged again. FML

#15604755
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36925) - you deserved it (3093)

On 04/02/2011 at 12:44pm - love - by Jon (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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