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Today, my cat vomited violently. I can smell it but I can't find it. FML

#18520750
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29103) - you deserved it (2983)

On 12/15/2011 at 4:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I spent all day organizing a list of electronic parts for my boss. I found the easiest way was to color problem parts in the spreadsheet red and okay parts green. After I finished at the end of the day, I found out my boss is red-green colorblind. FML

#7297645
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26509) - you deserved it (2982)

On 01/12/2010 at 10:08am - work - by Colormered - France

Today, my dad and I were in the car when a rabbit scurried across the road, just missing us. My dad turned and said to me, "Well, it's good we didn't hit him. He gets to live another day." I then looked in the rear view mirror to see the rabbit running away from the cross traffic, only to be hit by the car behind us. FML

#9102050
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21632) - you deserved it (2982)

On 03/15/2010 at 12:44pm - misc - by bunnylover (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I got a call from the office telling me I was fired. When I asked why, my boss explained my mother called and told him I was in a "weak mental state." She thought she was helping me get off for my birthday. Now I have no job. FML

#15350541
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35122) - you deserved it (2982)

On 03/17/2011 at 10:43am - work - by jezebel (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after spending hours wrapping the presents for Christmas, I came back into the room to find that my dog had lost his toy, knocked over all the presents, and was frantically ripping at everything to find it. FML

#18545148
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21039) - you deserved it (2982)

On 12/18/2011 at 2:31pm - animals - by dogh8er (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my sculpture, which is very important for my art grade, fell from my desk and broke to pieces. My art teacher suggested I soak the parts in water to make it easier to stick them back together. They dissolved. FML

#19131419
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26027) - you deserved it (2982)

On 02/21/2012 at 2:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - Germany (Thuringen)

Today, I heard a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I discovered my husband, naked and with his pants around his ankles, standing in the bathtub and pointing at a cockroach on the ground. After disposing of the body, I had to stay and comfort him while he wiped his ass. FML

#19919285
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26525) - you deserved it (2982)

On 07/10/2012 at 3:33pm - misc - by I_Has_A_Fishy - United States (Texas)

Today, I found the perfect opportunity to throw my husband a surprise party since he thought I was away on a business trip. He came home with a hooker. Surprise! FML

#20016279
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45592) - you deserved it (2982)

On 08/12/2012 at 1:49am - intimacy - by happybirthday - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I took my girlfriend out to eat at a diner where my friend works. My friend was our waiter but too busy to talk much. He texted me after we'd left to tell me that my girlfriend had slipped him her number. FML

#20894038
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48936) - you deserved it (2982)

On 09/24/2013 at 3:15am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I drove to a party after getting my car back from the shop. A thunderstorm started as I made my way there and upon arriving, the power went out. The guests decided to watch the storm from the front windows when someone mentioned how funny it would be if a tree fell on my car. Seconds later, one did. FML

#111850
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60710) - you deserved it (2981)

On 02/23/2009 at 3:08am - misc - by Jessie (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, it was my 24th birthday. I got a card from my sister reading: "Here's to another year of complete disregard for age-appropriate developmental milestones." She was right. FML

#1490
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13494) - you deserved it (2981)

On 01/17/2009 at 7:04pm - misc - by nothreat33 - United States (Maryland)

Today, my father had a dream that he'd lost me forever, and the pain was so unbearable, it woke him up. Turns out, the pain he was experiencing was just his bowels and he really needed to take a shit. This is the most affection I've ever received from my father. FML

#14398309
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24534) - you deserved it (2981)

On 12/30/2010 at 5:28pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I was on my way home on an airplane. The guy I had to sit next to was reading a book with naked girls in it. About 15 minutes into the flight, he had an erection and started to giggle. It was a 2 hour flight. FML

#13124550
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32387) - you deserved it (2981)

On 09/20/2010 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Thomas - United States (Oregon)



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