Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, at the café I work at, I was yelled at by a woman because the drinks and food she ordered were "taking too long". Before I had the chance to get a word in, she stormed out and said she would never come back. I didn't get the chance to inform her that she hadn't ordered yet. FML

#21106207
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43222) - you deserved it (3294)

On 04/06/2014 at 8:20pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, after coming home from school, I found that two birds have made a nest above the porch light. This wouldn't be a problem if they stopped attacking me every time I get within 5 feet of them. FML

#20663096
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38291) - you deserved it (3293)

On 05/14/2013 at 3:11pm - animals - by Locked Out - United States

Today, after telling my mother-in-law about my recent miscarriage, she cheerfully made a cake to celebrate. FML

#20714826
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49065) - you deserved it (3293)

On 06/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anoymous - United States (California)

Today, I went bowling with my mom and she paid for 2 games. By the 6th frame of game 1 she was bored and to get her money back for both games she told the employees I shit my pants. I'm 17. FML

#79689
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53008) - you deserved it (3292)

On 02/19/2009 at 4:47pm - money - by Noname (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my second roommate in less then a week got a DUI. Both roommates are demanding that I drive them around for free until they get their licenses back, or else they won't have the funds to pay their rent. FML

#16418621
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33810) - you deserved it (3292)

On 05/30/2011 at 2:11pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my sister came out of her room sobbing uncontrollably. When I asked what was wrong, she put her fingers in my face and asked if they smelled like pickles, and if "that's normal for girls". They did. It's not. FML

#20880468
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43793) - you deserved it (3292)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:42am - health - by Carebeareatu (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was on my way to work when my ex-wife drove past me in the car she got from me. She fucked me over so hard in the divorce that I have to ride my bike to work while wearing a full suit. FML

#21359275
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38189) - you deserved it (3292)

On 02/19/2015 at 3:45pm - money - by D: - United States (Colorado)

Today, after 3 long hours of mowing the lawn with a rusty lawn mower, my dad finally decided to tell me that he didn't get any money out to pay me with. The reason? He didn't think girls could mow a lawn and was expecting me to give up. FML

Today, I was sitting in a lecture about the history of the KKK and the problems it has caused, when the weirdest and quietest kid leans over my shoulder and says "I'd burn you first..." and winks. FML

#13455190
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33620) - you deserved it (3291)

On 10/15/2010 at 2:00am - misc - by racist - United States

Today, I walked in on my roommate flat-ironing his pubic hair. FML

#14524101
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32034) - you deserved it (3291)

On 01/09/2011 at 7:19pm - health - by curlyisnogood -

Today, my mother told me she wanted me to get an exorcism. Yes, she was serious. I'm Jewish. FML

#16999311
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27437) - you deserved it (3291)

On 07/06/2011 at 11:21am - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend asked me what he should get his mother for her birthday. FML

#20011729
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27039) - you deserved it (3291)

On 08/09/2012 at 4:16pm - intimacy - by Badkitty14 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up to a gift from my boyfriend: a Playboy magazine with a Post-It note that said, "Just a reminder that you're easily replaceable." I think he's still mad at me for beating him on X-box. FML

#20137933
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26934) - you deserved it (3291)

On 10/28/2012 at 11:39pm - love - by becca (woman) - United States



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: