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Today, I found out that my entire school differentiates me from another girl in my grade with the same name by saying "No, she's the lesbian one." I'm straight. FML

#12792184
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23805) - you deserved it (2537)

On 08/28/2010 at 7:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to the movies with my friends. A pretty redhead came on the screen. One of my guy friends leaned over to me and said, "Have you noticed there aren't any pretty redheads in real life?" I guess he forgot what color my hair is. FML

#8516526
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25036) - you deserved it (2537)

On 02/21/2010 at 12:54pm - misc - by Mika_Ookami - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I took the 6 year old I'm babysitting to the mall to see Santa after weeks of her begging. We got there in time to see him get out of his Prius and dress in the parking lot. FML

#18445536
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24384) - you deserved it (2537)

On 12/06/2011 at 4:01pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was stuck sitting at a cafeteria table next to the girl who broke my heart and her boyfriend. I got to overhear the conversation, which included "I want to go to the car" followed by "Me too, but I don't have a condom." FML

#7720142
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26548) - you deserved it (2536)

On 01/30/2010 at 8:35pm - love - by WishesWasDeaf (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I watched a cat pounce on a small bird and rip it to shreds, feather by feather. It wouldn't have been any worse than mildly disturbing, had I not just spent the last 4 weeks nursing the bird back to health from a broken wing. FML

#17746159
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25975) - you deserved it (2536)

On 09/14/2011 at 7:20pm - animals - by Twitchy (man) - Bahamas (New Providence)

Today, my mom was put in jail for beating the shit out of my dad. FML

#19291584
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33574) - you deserved it (2536)

On 03/17/2012 at 12:53am - misc - by Taylor Easley - United States (California)

Today, I went to my best friend's wedding. All my friends and their boyfriends were seated at one table, while I, as the only single girl in the group, was put on a table with all the other single people. They were all over forty years older than me. I feel like I have seen my future. FML

#6478242
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27364) - you deserved it (2535)

On 11/27/2009 at 1:16pm - love - by singlegirl (woman) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, I was grounded for not agreeing with an article on dating my mom found in a very strict magazine. The article told parents to monitor phone calls, make rumors about their children cheating on people and not allow their children anywhere but home. FML

#14694705
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36570) - you deserved it (2535)

On 01/24/2011 at 2:29am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, after I moved into my college dorm three days ago, my roommate is still convinced that she is a cat. FML

#16099079
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22114) - you deserved it (2535)

On 05/08/2011 at 11:22pm - animals - by SMCHR (woman) - Ireland

Today, I'm sitting in the ER with my eight-year-old son. He broke his arm after jumping out through the second story window. He was too impatient to walk to the ice cream van pulling up outside. FML

#19932634
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22109) - you deserved it (2535)

On 07/13/2012 at 1:08pm - kids - by Marjorie (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was renovating the house, and my girlfriend asked, "Do you use electrical tape on electrical stuff?" Not knowing where she was going with this, I just gave her a puzzled look. She continued by saying, "Because it's not like people use duct tape on ducks." FML

#20158312
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17826) - you deserved it (2535)

On 11/11/2012 at 12:05am - love - by Danny - United States (Utah)

Today, I was taking out a customer's groceries when he offered me a $5 tip. I told him I couldn't accept, since it's against store policy, but thanked him anyway. He called me an asshole just as my boss was walking to his car, who then yelled at me for it. FML

#20955992
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37886) - you deserved it (2535)

On 11/13/2013 at 1:42am - work - by BagBoy (man) - United States

Today, a customer started a conversation by telling me how smart he'd heard I am, and finished it by explaining his theory that only smart people commit suicide. He then gave me a knowing look and said, "Just something I thought you should think about," and left without buying anything. FML

#21013314
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33241) - you deserved it (2535)

On 01/01/2014 at 6:49pm - work - by Okay_Then (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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