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Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML

#12760106
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35688) - you deserved it (3443)

On 08/26/2010 at 7:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after spending 8 months and $11,000 on school, I was denied a job in my chosen career field. They told me they decided to go with someone with more experience. So who got the job? One of my classmates. This is her first job. EVER. FML

#16053406
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34256) - you deserved it (3443)

On 05/05/2011 at 2:54am - misc - by alphafoxy21 - United States (Alaska)

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

#18135742
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29588) - you deserved it (3443)

On 11/02/2011 at 1:06am - misc - by steve-o - United States

Today, I walked downstairs with a couple of bags full of stuff, in preparation for a sleepover at my friend's house. My nine-year-old cousin looked at me and said, "Where're you going? Fat camp?" FML

#20064659
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18830) - you deserved it (3443)

On 09/09/2012 at 1:02pm - health - by Char (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)

Today, as I was about to open a door at school, a student opened it and hit me. As I recovered and was about to open it again, someone else opened the door, hitting me again. Everyone laughed. FML

#20527903
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33053) - you deserved it (3443)

On 03/02/2013 at 9:09am - misc - by Doors Hate Me - United States

Today, I was reading a newspaper at a bus stop when a creepy guy rested his chin on my shoulder and said, "I miss the good old days, when people would read newspapers together and it wasn't classed as weird." Then he walked away. FML

#20772742
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39406) - you deserved it (3443)

On 07/09/2013 at 4:57pm - misc - by help - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I woke up to a mouse sitting on my pillow and chewing on my hair. FML

#21271220
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37703) - you deserved it (3443)

On 10/05/2014 at 1:04pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, due to awkward circumstances, I am living with my ex-girlfriend and her new girlfriend. FML

Today, my psycho ex girlfriend got up in my face after I dumped her. She said I'm going to pay and that one day, when I think I'm safe and happy, my joy will turn to ash in my mouth. When I pointed out she'd just ripped off a Game of Thrones quote, she kneed me in the balls. FML

#21439786
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25299) - you deserved it (3443)

On 07/10/2015 at 10:42pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to my new job at a pre-school. I was really excited because everything was going so well, and a little boy even said he was drawing a picture of me. He even gave it to me when he was finished. Well it was me, but I was also on fire and being stabbed and shot multiple times. FML

#1127830
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57675) - you deserved it (3442)

On 04/19/2009 at 7:07pm - work - by guessimdead (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my roommate revealed that the reason he's so grumpy is because he hasn't gotten laid in a year. I'm his only female friend, and the entire time he talked to me, he stared at my chest. FML

#5923040
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21566) - you deserved it (3442)

On 10/20/2009 at 11:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my husband doesn't love me. At all. He told me this while playing Call of Duty with his friends with his microphone on. FML

#10578694
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32255) - you deserved it (3442)

On 05/16/2010 at 10:24pm - love - by jolene11 - United States

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend because he's been working extra hard these last two months. I went to his house only to find him in bed with another girl. Standing there, with fifteen roses in my hands, all he could say was, "Thank you, can you put them in a vase?" FML

#13497431
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41655) - you deserved it (3442)

On 10/18/2010 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)



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