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Today, I was teaching a ten year old how to play piano. Halfway through the lesson, she made a minor mistake, which, trying to be a good tutor, I corrected her. She smiled up at me, paused, then slammed the key cover down onto my fingers. FML

#6245178
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35924) - you deserved it (2987)

On 11/10/2009 at 4:41pm - misc - by PiaNO (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I slid on ice and hit another car while driving to work. My car was totalled, and my leg hurt, while the other car had very little damage. Not two minutes later, the salt truck drove by, spraying the road. FML

#7275776
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22266) - you deserved it (2987)

On 01/11/2010 at 8:43am - misc - by wrecked (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I'm getting kicked out of my flat because my drunk friends stole a pony and left it tied outside. FML

#17669700
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25813) - you deserved it (2987)

On 09/05/2011 at 11:03am - misc - by thefrightening1 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, my parents made a list of all the things they could have done had I not been born. FML

#19812575
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30963) - you deserved it (2987)

On 06/19/2012 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by theunborn - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML

#20430634
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26254) - you deserved it (2987)

On 12/29/2012 at 8:01pm - work - by nose hurts (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I won a lottery at my local grocery store. Excited, I went to claim my prize, only to discover it was a bottle of red wine. I'm a recovering alcoholic. FML

#20858175
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40712) - you deserved it (2987)

On 08/28/2013 at 5:47pm - misc - by notsolucky - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was on the bus, heading to work, when the girl beside me started yelling at me, claiming I was staring down her shirt. I did no such thing, but the driver nonetheless stopped the bus and made me get off, all under the withering glares of the other passengers. FML

#20907593
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41313) - you deserved it (2987)

On 10/04/2013 at 8:04pm - misc - by ricky the sage (man) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I found out why my dad always treated me badly as a kid compared to my siblings. It's because I was conceived while my mom was cheating on him. On top of that, he made it clear that he still doesn't consider me a "real" part of the family. FML

#21091901
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51048) - you deserved it (2987)

On 03/20/2014 at 4:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got a email from my boss. He said he was going to have to let me go for missing so much work over the last week. I was laid off two months ago. I don't know what is more depressing, getting fired from a job twice or the fact it took two months for them to notice I wasn't there anymore. FML

#1189537
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60572) - you deserved it (2986)

On 04/21/2009 at 11:11am - work - by laxguy23 (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, instead of going to a romantic dinner with my boyfriend like I'd planned, I ended up babysitting his queasy little sister. FML

#13925206
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20221) - you deserved it (2986)

On 11/21/2010 at 1:36pm - kids - by kaileekat517 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a co-worker superior to me called me "Stephanie" yet again. My name is Ashley. I politely informed her that my name is Ashley and subtely pointed to my work ID. Later, I get called into my supervisor's office. I got written up for correcting someone of higher status that I. FML

#219945
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58569) - you deserved it (2985)

On 03/05/2009 at 7:15pm - work - by yankeebelle (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I slipped on the ice in front of my apartment, spraining my ankle and cracking a rib. While I laid on the ground immediately after, my neighbor chewed me out for saying "shit" in front of her 4-year-old on my way down. FML

#206067
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58455) - you deserved it (2985)

On 03/04/2009 at 12:03pm - misc - by stupidneighbor (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I went to a party and crashed on the bedroom floor. I woke up to sex noises coming from the bed. I pretended to still be asleep. I sent a text to my boyfriend to tell him about it. I heard his phone beep from over in the bed. FML

#8894345
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33240) - you deserved it (2985)

On 03/07/2010 at 2:56pm - intimacy - by woopdeedo_1 (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

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