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Today, I proposed to my girlfriend, only for her to slap me, throwing the "fake ring" away and storming off, convinced it was a cruel joke. FML

#21265921
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40306) - you deserved it (3555)

On 09/26/2014 at 5:27pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over a stupid argument, but after a long day we made up and got back together. Not long afterwards, my friend called, feeling guilty and confessing that he had sex with her after finding out she'd dumped me. FML

#21332729
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40639) - you deserved it (3555)

On 01/07/2015 at 2:37pm - love - by Anonymous - Guam

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML

#21002970
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42558) - you deserved it (3555)

On 12/23/2013 at 9:48pm - love - by .... (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 6-year-old brother showed me the "books" he's been writing for the past week. My parents, who are first-generation immigrants, want him to take the books to school to show everyone. My only problem with this? The main character's name is "Wanker". FML

#21195314
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39127) - you deserved it (3554)

On 07/01/2014 at 5:41pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a kid looked at me, screamed, then ran away yelling "Chewbacca!" FML

#21338512
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29310) - you deserved it (3554)

On 01/16/2015 at 8:59pm - kids - by DrLight - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was taking the subway to school. It was around 6:30am and I was listening to music and catching up on homework. When I took my headphones off to readjust them, I heard some grunting. I looked over at the man across from me to see he was masturbating. FML

#256186
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71089) - you deserved it (3553)

On 03/09/2009 at 10:04pm - intimacy - by danesy - United States (New York)

Today, I was driving my child to school when the car let out a huge bang. It shuddered to a halt. My son started laughing. I asked him what was funny but he wouldn't tell me. The car wouldn't start. I called RACV and they told me the problem. My son had rolled 9 golf balls into the exhaust pipe. FML

#6095339
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33531) - you deserved it (3553)

On 11/01/2009 at 1:44am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my entire extended family was over for Christmas. I opened a gift to see that it was a fruitcake and saw everyone looking at me, smiling. This is their way to tell me that they know I'm gay and that they accept me. I'm straight. FML

#6940089
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36007) - you deserved it (3553)

On 12/25/2009 at 2:34pm - misc - by notgay (man) - United States (California)

Today, while trying to give an immunization to a "special" 13-year-old, I got spit on, kicked, almost bitten, and had a chair thrown at me. When it was all over, I flinched when the patient tried to hug me. Her mom called me a "b*tch" and I later found out she wasn't a "special" child. FML

#12767492
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36248) - you deserved it (3553)

On 08/27/2010 at 2:49am - work - by atetoeate (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend opened the car door in a very kind and loving way. What wasn't so kind and loving was that my hand was still half-way when he closed it. FML

#17407697
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27153) - you deserved it (3553)

On 08/08/2011 at 2:11pm - health - by oops (woman) - South Africa (Eastern Cape)

Today, I was staying over at my boyfriend's house, sleeping in his sister's room while she is away at college. I left my necklace on her dresser. When I came back, it was gone. His mother saw it there and thought it was her daughter's necklace. She hid it so I wouldn't "steal it". FML

#12187023
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34163) - you deserved it (3552)

On 07/29/2010 at 1:29pm - misc - by pandaboo (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, during my friend's group's science project presentation, the teacher yelled at me, "Stop making stupid faces at the presenters!" I was smiling. FML

#18162768
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27640) - you deserved it (3552)

On 11/05/2011 at 7:06am - misc - by mcadabax (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my little sister asked me to open a jar of pickles for her. I struggled a little until the lid busted open, and pickle juice poured over my pocket and the iPhone inside. My sister then sniffed the jar, made a disgusted face, and ran out. FML

#20444015
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21475) - you deserved it (3552)

On 01/05/2013 at 7:06pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)



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