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Today, since I'm too broke to get a new one, I had to duct tape my bra. FML

#19303310
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26325) - you deserved it (3035)

On 03/18/2012 at 8:51pm - money - by liver (woman) - United States (California)

Today, as a pizza delivery guy, I was forced to see yet another naked 200 pound teenage girl with a serious case of body acne. They're starting to give me nightmares. FML

#20081849
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26191) - you deserved it (3035)

On 09/21/2012 at 6:57am - work - by scarred for life - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I passed out while I was with my boyfriend in his garden. I woke up on the concrete just outside his house. Apparently, he'd tried to carry me in, but because he was too weak, he gave up and went to watch TV. FML

#20131269
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23018) - you deserved it (3035)

On 10/24/2012 at 12:52pm - love - by Alice - United Kingdom

Today, I had to go tree shopping with my dad and some of his work buddies. It hit its lowest point when one loudly told us about a crap handjob he got recently. "I mean yeah, choke the cock," he said, "but don't choke it to DEATH, nam'sayin'?" I'd never wanted to just drop dead more. FML

#20993322
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35038) - you deserved it (3035)

On 12/15/2013 at 12:18pm - misc - by ANONYMOUS -_- (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I learned that because of my new medication, I can either avoid getting malaria, or have a male yeast infection. I'm stuck in Africa for the next two months, and have to sit down to pee because I don't want to irritate my penis by touching it. FML

#4421070
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39981) - you deserved it (3034)

On 08/10/2009 at 2:27am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Ghana (Volta)

Today, after watching the news, I realized the only person who has ever wished that I had a good day, or wished that I had anything pleasant for that matter, is Charlie Gibson on World News Tonight. FML

#5832745
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19584) - you deserved it (3034)

On 10/14/2009 at 7:06pm - misc - by newscomes (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I can't get my heat to turn off. It is currently 87 degrees Fahrenheit in my house, and my heat is running non-stop. It's about 20 degrees outside with over a foot of snow on the ground, so a repairman can't come out to fix it. My electricity bill will be about $1000. FML

#6829701
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28997) - you deserved it (3034)

On 12/19/2009 at 3:10pm - money - by heatproblems (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend feeds her boogers to our dog. Sometimes she even makes her do tricks for them. FML

#7925125
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30444) - you deserved it (3034)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:27am - animals - by btg - United States (California)

Today, after almost nine months of doing anything and everything to show my love for my girlfriend and make her happy, she told me she would give "anything" to relive the one week of her and her ex's relationship where she was the happiest in her life. FML

#7831807
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26700) - you deserved it (3034)

On 02/02/2010 at 10:52pm - love - by redjesus69 (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my tire blew while I was on the freeway. I had to change the tire in pouring rain while wearing short shorts and flip-flops. No one stopped to help, but several people politely honked as if to remind me of my misfortune. FML

#20062636
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18956) - you deserved it (3034)

On 09/08/2012 at 12:47am - misc - by wonder woman (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I saw a customer at the restaurant I work at lovingly petting his cheeseburger and whispering sweet promises to it. FML

#21234388
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33581) - you deserved it (3034)

On 08/10/2014 at 10:22pm - work - by weirded out (man) - United States (California)

Today, a customer came in to the Pizza store where I work and complained that the food they had purchased had a strand of black hair in it. After some deliberation, my boss decided to fire me. He is the only staff member there with black hair. I shaved my hair 2 weeks ago. FML

#965793
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78622) - you deserved it (3033)

On 04/14/2009 at 7:18am - work - by hcfan (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got a call from a girl I fell madly in love with 8 years ago. She disappeared from my life with no trace. Turns out she just finalized her divorce, has 2 wild kids, packed on 75 lbs, has $25,000 in debt and is taking meds to keep from going crazy. Now she wants me back. FML

#6983877
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33663) - you deserved it (3033)

On 12/28/2009 at 12:03am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)



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