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Today, it was my co-worker's birthday but she told me not to mention it. Feeling bad for her, I went out to buy her a card, a present, and even a small cake. It turns out that there was actually a party during our lunch break, and I was the only one in our office not invited. FML

#10983443
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34888) - you deserved it (3089)

On 06/05/2010 at 6:36am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that my employers hired me under the assumption that I was gay. Apparently, they are attempting to be perceived as more open-minded. I'm not gay, but I'm afraid being straight could cost me my job. FML

#12872316
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32565) - you deserved it (3089)

On 09/02/2010 at 5:09pm - work - by confused (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I caught my mother trying to text on her iPhone, with her nipple. FML

#18364433
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37526) - you deserved it (3089)

On 11/27/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, we had our whole staff photo. We all had to stand up in rows in height order, as I'm tall I had to stand in the middle, at the back. I'm horribly claustrophobic and ended up fainting in front of 100 colleagues, taking down 4 people around me. FML

#19144680
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22093) - you deserved it (3089)

On 02/23/2012 at 7:11am - work - by photofaint - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I heard my boyfriend talking with my father in the backyard. I thought he was asking for my hand in marriage. He was actually telling him about his plans to break up with me. FML

#21265851
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31180) - you deserved it (3091)

On 09/26/2014 at 3:13pm - love - by ihateguys (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at 7 in the morning, I end up outside in a night dress, with bare feet and in the rain. I've just found out that my two year old son now knows how to close the patio door, which of course, has no outside door handle. FML

#685
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18787) - you deserved it (3088)

On 01/02/2009 at 8:22pm - kids - by lilou - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mom asked me to look through old VHS tapes to throw away, I found one that said "Ashley's kindergarten Play-'95", I put the tape in, it begins to play, only to see "Days of our lives", "Melrose Place", and "ER". My childhood memories are ranked lower than tv shows. FML

#863008
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53802) - you deserved it (3088)

On 04/07/2009 at 10:53pm - love - by 4gottenmemories (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boss called me into his office. Expecting a long overdue promotion, I hurried in. Instead, he told me he thought I would be perfect to take his son on a pity date, because he is at a suicide risk from depression. FML

#16338194
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32649) - you deserved it (3088)

On 05/25/2011 at 1:21am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada

Today, I found out via Facebook status that my boyfriend is going to Hawaii with a group of friends, including his ex-girlfriend for a few weeks. When I confronted him about it, he said he didn't think I needed to know, and to mind my own business. I think I'm about to be single. FML

#19661791
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29670) - you deserved it (3088)

On 05/22/2012 at 10:32am - love - by angry girlfriend - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist and thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a red laser light through his window. I was on the stairs when he ran past, screaming bloody murder, sending me down a flight of steps. FML

#20919796
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42065) - you deserved it (3088)

On 10/14/2013 at 3:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, my little cousin is going to be staying at our house for a year or so, because of financial problems. It wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the fact that every single night he creeps up on me while I'm sleeping, and shouts "GO F YOURSELF!" directly into my ear. Only another 11 months to go. FML

#13622060
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27170) - you deserved it (3087)

On 10/28/2010 at 12:44am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a basketball game. A very pretty woman sat next to him. During the third quarter, the kiss cam came on. But it didn't show him and me, it showed him and the other girl. And they kissed. FML

#19426684
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44436) - you deserved it (3087)

On 04/07/2012 at 11:19pm - love - by jordyn173 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, an attractive guy came up to me and told me that I looked sexy in a picture online. He then asked himself why he had never asked me out before. Apparently, he doesn't remember our 6-month relationship, or how it ended when he slept with my sister. FML

#20548927
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42790) - you deserved it (3087)

On 03/18/2013 at 4:28am - love - by mcds2 (woman) - United States



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