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Today, my boyfriend told me he likes to do things the old-fashioned way, and that he wouldn't propose to me without my father's blessing. My dad died 3 years ago, and he knows it. FML

#21232717
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46697) - you deserved it (3175)

On 08/08/2014 at 6:53pm - love - by lonethong15 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boss pretty much told me that I'm too ugly to meet clients, and should stay in the office doing the paperwork. So basically, I'm a modern day Hunchback of Notre Dame. FML

#21232284
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37051) - you deserved it (3175)

On 08/08/2014 at 2:13am - work - by Anonymous - Singapore

Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently copied my key before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering: “He looks like Jesus.” FML

#6842444
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39984) - you deserved it (3174)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:47am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at my internship, I was told we were going to do something fun. I was excited, until I found out that this "fun" thing was labeling 500 folders. FML

#19017248
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19767) - you deserved it (3174)

On 02/07/2012 at 10:07am - work - by strongjon60 - United States

Today, while I was at work, I was on the verge of tears. My coworker asked what was wrong and I explained that I recently had to put my dog down. He then replied, "Cool story, bro. Tell it again." FML

#20565029
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36519) - you deserved it (3174)

On 03/29/2013 at 4:23am - work - by CoolStoryBro -

Today, I dragged myself to work, suffering from a bad cold. My boss quietly told me to go home and rest, to avoid spreading it around the office. I thought it odd since he dislikes me so much, but I did as he said. He called later in the day to suspend me for leaving work early. FML

#20823652
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50514) - you deserved it (3174)

On 08/06/2013 at 10:44am - work - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school today. She had been telling the teacher, "I have a huge boner." Apparently, some of the kids at school told her it meant 'headache' and she's been saying it all day. FML

#20928358
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41409) - you deserved it (3174)

On 10/20/2013 at 11:51pm - kids - by momaaa1342 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I decided to fix my bike and take it for a test ride. Five minutes in, a bee flew into my eye and stung me. In pain, I thought it would be best to go home. I turned around to find a big pitbull running towards me. The dog chased me for a mile before giving up. FML

Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to a snake. Not because of the size or shape, but because a snake is not something she imagines herself ever touching. FML

#19281835
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28551) - you deserved it (3173)

On 03/15/2012 at 7:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me love is like a drug. I started tearing up because this is the most romantic he has been in a while. He then went on to break up with me, telling me that my "prescription is up". FML

#18577154
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30658) - you deserved it (3173)

On 12/22/2011 at 3:09am - love - by Jean - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my daughter brought her new boyfriend over for dinner. I realize now why she said we would get along great: we graduated high school together. FML

#18689614
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43726) - you deserved it (3173)

On 01/02/2012 at 8:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, some Juggalos mocked me for the way I was dressed. Juggalos giving sartorial advice, really? FML

#19491584
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15801) - you deserved it (3173)

On 04/18/2012 at 7:08pm - misc - by amazed (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out my mom thought I was a lesbian because I dated a girl in high school. I didn't date anyone in high school. Apparently, guys never asked me out because my best friend told everyone that I was her girlfriend. I had a two-year lesbian relationship that I never knew about. FML

#20554170
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47460) - you deserved it (3173)

On 03/21/2013 at 8:35pm - love - by SmallAngel (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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