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Today, the love of my life, and long term partner, sat me down and told me that he feels so comfortable in our relationship that he no longer feels the need to have sex with me, and he doesn't think that that will ever change. FML

#20162862
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31582) - you deserved it (3102)

On 11/14/2012 at 5:36am - intimacy - by nolove - Australia

Today, I opened my Christmas present from my parents. I got a road-side assistance package. I don't own a vehicle, and I don't even have a driver's license. FML

#20420365
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28079) - you deserved it (3102)

On 12/25/2012 at 1:41am - misc - by CambodianAsshole (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out after spending my life's income on paying for my grandma's cancer treatment that she has been faking it. FML

#20859354
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54035) - you deserved it (3102)

On 08/29/2013 at 2:48pm - health - by scammed (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my little brother was playing with my cat, getting it to chase a laser pointer. He thought it would be funny to shine the laser pointer over my nuts. FML

#7760741
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25666) - you deserved it (3101)

On 01/31/2010 at 10:16pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was released from jail. I had helped a three year old girl get up after falling on a wet floor at the mall last night when the security guards tasered me. Only this morning did they tell me they had mistaken me for a child molester that looks a little bit like me. FML

#14710569
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41593) - you deserved it (3101)

On 01/25/2011 at 4:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was at Wal-Mart walking around when I slipped on some water and twisted my ankle. As I was getting up, a man comes up to me and said "There's some water on the floor, watch out." FML

#17770342
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25278) - you deserved it (3101)

On 09/18/2011 at 5:20am - misc - by yeahhhhhommmie (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while I was putting up Christmas lights, my younger brother wouldn't stop pestering me. It seems he hadn't forgotten the time I gave myself an electric shock last year, and he wanted to see if I'd do it again. FML

#18419129
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20237) - you deserved it (3101)

On 12/03/2011 at 1:11pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML

#19603084
408 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57318) - you deserved it (3101)

On 05/10/2012 at 4:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend of nine months made a huge scene in public, calling me a "cheating bastard" because she saw me with another woman at the library. That "other woman" is my Calculus tutor. FML

#20514871
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31004) - you deserved it (3101)

On 02/20/2013 at 1:20pm - love - by ? - United States (California)

Today, I turned around after loading the washing machine to discover my husband's 89-year-old grandmother dropping her pants. She looked at me and said, "I hope you don't mind but when you got to go, you got to go." She then sat down on the toilet and let out a loud, long fart. FML

#20857413
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35084) - you deserved it (3101)

On 08/28/2013 at 12:48am - misc - by Grandmas lost it - United States (New York)

Today, I got really excited when I got an email from a guy I've been flirting with in my math class. Turns out he thinks I stole his calculator and wants it back immediately. There goes my chance. FML

#20880890
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39177) - you deserved it (3101)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:04pm - love - by crushed (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was pointing out my car to my roommate. He responded with, "Oh that one with the broken window?" Turns out my car had been broken into. They took my CD player, GPS and Ipod. On top of that they left a Reese's Fastbreak wrapper and sunflower seeds on my front seat. FML

#7324506
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21434) - you deserved it (3100)

On 01/13/2010 at 7:08pm - misc - by Eli (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, the police were canvassing my neighbourhood about a recent robbery. When I answered the door, my brother saw badges, panicked, and jumped out our apartment's third-storey window in an attempt to escape. He thought they were after him for using a bong two weeks ago. I'm related to this twit. FML

#17252613
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31494) - you deserved it (3100)

On 07/25/2011 at 10:10am - misc - by Bec (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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