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Today, I realized my wife often switches the TV channel from the crime dramas we both like, to Hollywood gossip shows that I can't stand, just to get me to leave the room. From the other room, I can see that she switches back once I've left. She's probably been doing this for years. FML

#18592801
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28550) - you deserved it (3146)

On 12/23/2011 at 9:24pm - love - by unwanted (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while driving my grandma home from a family dinner, I had to pull into a gas station, because my tank was almost empty. She became convinced that someone would kidnap her while I went to pay, and eventually threatened to blow us up by tossing her lighter at the gas pumps. FML

#20648219
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42258) - you deserved it (3146)

On 05/07/2013 at 6:13pm - misc - by fuckingjesusgran (man) - Bosnia and Herzegovina (Federation of Bosnia and Herzego)

Today, I realized how nice it was that, after moving into my ground-floor apartment, I no longer have to worry about being too loud walking on the floor at night. Today, I found out that my upstairs neighbors do not have any qualms about shouting or stomping their feet loudly at night, either. FML

#20865605
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34578) - you deserved it (3146)

On 09/03/2013 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, with my name sounding vaguely like 'Turkey' and being in the phonebook for business purposes, people keep calling, offering to stuff me for Thanksgiving. FML

#20973255
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35871) - you deserved it (3146)

On 11/28/2013 at 1:26am - animals - by NotTellingYouMyName (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was being shown how to use a nail gun while applying for a job at a construction company. The instructor shot me in the arm with it. I didn't even get the job. FML

#21107174
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44911) - you deserved it (3146)

On 04/07/2014 at 10:13pm - work - by watch_corn_dance - United States (Illinois)

Today, I dropped my remote behind the bed and went to reach for it. Instead of the remote, I grabbed hold of a rat carcass that must have got in when builders were working in my bathroom several weeks ago. FML

#14221771
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27810) - you deserved it (3145)

On 12/16/2010 at 6:54am - misc - by xxmollyxx (woman) - Sweden

Today, on his way out of our apartment, my roommate's friend reached over and grabbed a handful of my popcorn. I was only mildly annoyed, until a little later, when I pulled out from between my teeth what could only have been a pubic hair. FML

#20808032
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41715) - you deserved it (3145)

On 07/28/2013 at 1:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Slovenia (Ruse Commune)

Today, my girlfriend told me that she's totally convinced I'm gay. When I tried explaining that I can't be if I'm attracted to her, she took it as me thinking she's mannish. FML

#17826284
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29983) - you deserved it (3144)

On 09/25/2011 at 12:23am - love - by Leenotgay (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I went on a long flight. I was fortunate enough to sit next to a great girl. However, she must have thought I was not so great, because she moved to the empty seat across the aisle. Next to my dad. Who then told stories about how I always get motion sickness on airplanes. I then threw up. FML

#19828515
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21599) - you deserved it (3144)

On 06/22/2012 at 10:11am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my computer stopped connecting to the corporate network. I know what the problem is, but our tech support is so clueless that the only thing they do is utter the dreaded words, "Did you try turning it off and back on?" Meanwhile my boss is yelling at me for not getting any work done. FML

#20849629
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36895) - you deserved it (3144)

On 08/22/2013 at 5:33pm - work - by lord kuntface (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I turned around after loading the washing machine to discover my husband's 89-year-old grandmother dropping her pants. She looked at me and said, "I hope you don't mind but when you got to go, you got to go." She then sat down on the toilet and let out a loud, long fart. FML

#20857413
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35540) - you deserved it (3144)

On 08/28/2013 at 12:48am - misc - by Grandmas lost it - United States (New York)

Today, I was hiking down a steep hill, and I slipped. I instinctively grabbed the nearest object to me: a very prickly cactus. FML

#21249060
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34678) - you deserved it (3144)

On 08/31/2014 at 1:51pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after returning from taking my sister off to college, my parents told me that our house would be a lot quieter with my sister gone. Not because she's loud, but because she has friends and I apparently don't. FML

#21252132
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35178) - you deserved it (3144)

On 09/04/2014 at 10:59pm - misc - by AllieG33 - United States (New Mexico)



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