Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was in a shoe store. I picked up a shoe so I could look at it, but when I put it back on the shelf, the whole shelf fell down, making all the shoes fall to the ground. The people behind the counter started clapping. FML

#7090975
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26005) - you deserved it (3780)

On 01/01/2010 at 9:45pm - misc - by shoes (woman) - United States

Today, as I was driving with my boyfriend, he pointed out what a crappy car I drive. About how the locks don't work, the vents are broken, the windshield wipers are busted, my headlights aren't bright, and a hubcap is missing. Then he said I’m a good match for my car, 'cos we have the same “personality". FML

#5969153
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32069) - you deserved it (3780)

On 10/24/2009 at 1:07am - love - by Clunker (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at work I was told I'd be working over Christmas because I don't drink. Apparently if you're tee-total, you're not entitled to spend time with your family and are incapable of having fun. FML

#6565832
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31100) - you deserved it (3780)

On 12/02/2009 at 8:27am - work - by ostler (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I finally found out who has been hacking my email account to send dirty messages to my teacher. My dad. FML

#16237606
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43232) - you deserved it (3780)

On 05/18/2011 at 1:13pm - misc - by Charles (man) - Norway (Akershus)

Today, I had to fire an employee because she constantly calls in, or is late to work. She became very emotional and I felt kind of bad, so I walked her out myself. We then got stuck in the company elevator. FML

#17750469
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29228) - you deserved it (3780)

On 09/15/2011 at 9:47am - work - by thatsmejl (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, as part of my job as a swimming instructor, I had to help a teenage boy learn how to float. This involves supporting the person's back as they try to float. His boner stood straight up. FML

#20185787
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40451) - you deserved it (3780)

On 11/30/2012 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by julia (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at work, I politely asked a patron to be quieter; I was hit in the face. I work in a library. FML

#20750109
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44313) - you deserved it (3780)

On 06/27/2013 at 11:02am - work - by rubgy_lover - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found a diaper in the parking lot. It's been raining all morning. This was the wrong day to wear flip-flops. FML

#21489166
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20931) - you deserved it (3780)

On 11/06/2015 at 9:27am - work - by dirtytoes (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend brought me to his place to meet his parents. When they saw me, they laughed. FML

#5661944
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44479) - you deserved it (3779)

On 10/05/2009 at 1:29pm - misc - by omfgmaya - Denmark (Vestsjalland)

Today, I had to explain to my friend why it's inappropriate to conduct a phone conversation while simultaneously eating a bagel, listening to music, and taking a shit. FML

#14521055
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25282) - you deserved it (3779)

On 01/09/2011 at 1:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my mom said we are having a party for the 4th of July. Her definition of a party is my grandma coming over. FML

#16974064
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29957) - you deserved it (3779)

On 07/04/2011 at 3:06pm - misc - by Kate - United States (Illinois)

Today, at work, I put on a smile and went to take an elderly gentleman's order. He looked at me, asked if I'd stick a finger in his sweet tea to make it sweeter, then complained that it was a shame I wasn't "on the menu". FML

#21302690
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33617) - you deserved it (3779)

On 11/20/2014 at 11:20am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I ran into my crush of three years ago. We used to always walk our dogs together. He still remembered my dog's name. He didn't remember mine. FML

#3168313
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53287) - you deserved it (3778)

On 06/24/2009 at 6:10am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: