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Today, after disappearing for an unusually long period of time, my boss called the store phone while sitting on the toilet. Turns out she'd started bleeding uncontrollably from the arse, and as the only other female staff member, she needed me to go help her. FML

#15151790
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31487) - you deserved it (3115)

On 02/28/2011 at 1:29pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, a total stranger on the bus called me hideous and threw a soda in my face. I only asked him if the seat next to him was taken. FML

#17048924
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31841) - you deserved it (3115)

On 07/10/2011 at 2:03am - misc - by ugly (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at my internship, I was told we were going to do something fun. I was excited, until I found out that this "fun" thing was labeling 500 folders. FML

#19017248
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19260) - you deserved it (3115)

On 02/07/2012 at 10:07am - work - by strongjon60 - United States

Today, it's my 21st birthday. I got a call from my deadbeat dad, who I thought had finally mellowed and had something nice to say. Nope; he just told me I'm 21 years a disappointment, then hung up. FML

#21128831
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41146) - you deserved it (3115)

On 05/02/2014 at 2:20pm - misc - by thanks (man) - United States (California)

Today, it's the third anniversary of when I started looking for a new job. I'm still working at the job that made me want to get a new one and I haven't even had an interview for another one in almost two years. My Master's degree on the wall is looking more and more like a roll of toilet paper. FML

#8990477
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21682) - you deserved it (3114)

On 03/11/2010 at 1:45am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was playing rugby. I was tackled very hard at the end of a play, and I got up to find my head bleeding profusely. Not one person offered to drive me to the ER. I had to drive myself to get six stitches in the face. FML

#7771454
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27185) - you deserved it (3114)

On 02/01/2010 at 2:34am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to go use an automatic cart in Walmart because I broke my hip in January. They were all being used by morbidly obese people throughout the store. I asked a manager if she could get me one, but apparently their weight issues are more impeding than my broken hip. FML

#14873123
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35021) - you deserved it (3115)

On 02/06/2011 at 9:36pm - misc - by LimpMcgee (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my mom still hasn't gotten over the novelty of our brand new microwave. We've been eating hot pockets for nearly a week now. FML

#17281268
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25035) - you deserved it (3114)

On 07/27/2011 at 7:45pm - misc - by ladytyy - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he believes getting kicked in the balls is a scientifically-proven method of birth control. FML

#19428378
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23248) - you deserved it (3114)

On 04/08/2012 at 6:37am - intimacy - by Jordan - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML

#21092834
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38772) - you deserved it (3114)

On 03/21/2014 at 5:44pm - health - by iusedprotectionanyway (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, for the third time this week, I had to clean up after someone who pissed themselves in the beer aisle at the grocery store where I work. FML

#21216504
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36716) - you deserved it (3114)

On 07/21/2014 at 5:15pm - work - by notpayedenoughforthisshit (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I discovered that I have developed an allergy to salt water on my face. Now, every time I sweat or cry, I come up in a bright red rash. I am allergic to my own bodily fluids. FML

#4226851
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60132) - you deserved it (3113)

On 08/02/2009 at 8:45am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my fiancée and I were selecting our wedding cake. The wedding is now off since I refused to buy her the "dream" wedding cake she wanted because it was chocolate. She called me childish and cheap. I'm highly allergic to chocolate. FML

#8642847
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36701) - you deserved it (3113)

On 02/25/2010 at 4:47pm - misc - by Ringless - United States (Virginia)



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