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Today, my fiancée called our engagement off, because apparently she's actually a complete idiot who will believe anything that a slimy con artist tells her. In this case, a "psychic" who mumbled some shit about me having "a dark aura." FML

#19628029
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28577) - you deserved it (3425)

On 05/15/2012 at 4:56pm - love - by waste of effort (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I was upset because my brother, who I'm very close to, didn't call me for my birthday yesterday. I told my mom about it, and we both immediately went silent on the phone, as we both realized she forgot to call me yesterday as well. FML

#20474927
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42478) - you deserved it (3425)

On 01/23/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by birthday_loser (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I walked in on my little brother making a Devil's trap so he could capture the demon he thinks is possessing my hamster. FML

#21287735
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32472) - you deserved it (3425)

On 10/29/2014 at 3:39pm - kids - by lexigan4 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my study partner for my biology class didn't go to lecture. Not once has he gone to lecture. I went to almost every lecture. He got better grades than I did. FML

#2101
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21333) - you deserved it (3424)

On 01/21/2009 at 5:36pm - misc - by noodle - United States (California)

Today, I told my mom I was going on a date tonight. She laughed and didn't believe me. When I tried to convince her it was real, she got mad and grounded me for lying. I had to cancel the date. FML

#7014682
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37175) - you deserved it (3424)

On 12/29/2009 at 1:50pm - love - by Grounded (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up to find my new roommate staring straight at me. She then went on to say, "I love how you sleep," and continued to stare. I live in a residence off campus and I've already changed roommates twice this year. I'm stuck with a person who stares at me sleep for the next two years. FML

#13789372
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27213) - you deserved it (3424)

On 11/10/2010 at 11:32am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Argentina (Cordoba)

Today, I was told that I will never be able to have children. Thankfully for my husband, his girlfriend sure can. FML

#15252326
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49726) - you deserved it (3424)

On 03/09/2011 at 5:08pm - love - by sosad -

Today, my family and I visited my cousins in Virginia. When we arrived, we found that they already had guests over. I've stuttered my whole life, so when they asked me what my name was, I stuttered for several seconds trying to say my name. Everyone burst out laughing. FML

#20805698
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52426) - you deserved it (3424)

On 07/27/2013 at 12:47am - misc - by Odnel (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML

#21053382
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42089) - you deserved it (3424)

On 02/07/2014 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Mayotte

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years confessed that he was sleeping with me and 5 other girls while we first started dating. He told me he numbered us and rolled a die to see which one he would date. I guess I won. FML

#6775724
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34354) - you deserved it (3423)

On 12/16/2009 at 7:09am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while trying to change my visiting cousin's opinion about our state being "redneck and white trash", we stumbled upon a proposal/celebration in a Walmart. So much for changing her opinion. FML

#20066095
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17377) - you deserved it (3423)

On 09/10/2012 at 8:48am - misc - by liquidknight - United States

Today, my crush gave me a ride home. When I opened the door to get out, he switched the gear to reverse, thinking the car was in park. I got run over by the car door. FML

#15354612
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30962) - you deserved it (3423)

On 03/17/2011 at 5:26pm - misc - by boom - United States (Maryland)

Today, after my dad trying every bait, hormone, and poison, the cockroaches in this apartment have gone crazy. They are trying to kill themselves. One tried to commit suicide, by suffocation, in my mouth this morning. FML

#21282365
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37170) - you deserved it (3423)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:42am - misc - by youngboob (woman) - United States (Kansas)



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  • It's the weekend so let's plaster on a fake smile and plough through this shit one more time. Sorry, I was channelling Bill Hicks there. I'll start again. Hi everyone, how are you doing? This week…

Friday 29 May 2015

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