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Today, I went to a blood drive. The nurse taking my blood mentioned that she'd been called in on her day off, and she swore she wasn't drunk. I didn't know what to do, so I just smiled and blinked back tears as she savaged the vein in my arm. FML

#19466370
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19974) - you deserved it (2581)

On 04/14/2012 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. I said yes. This caused him to panic, excuse himself, then take it back via text message a half hour later, claiming he'd been drunk. We live together. When he comes back home, it's going to be very awkward indeed. FML

#20541052
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35615) - you deserved it (2581)

On 03/12/2013 at 6:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I repeatedly had to ask people to please stop groping the mannequins. FML

Today, I got a call at 4 in the morning from the security company, saying someone had broken into my workplace. I drove an hour out there, only to find out it was a rat that had set off the alarm. FML

#21000984
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36902) - you deserved it (2581)

On 12/22/2013 at 1:56am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my sister got married. For the second time. She's 30. Two men have loved her enough to cry over their vows to her. Every single person there asked me why I wasn't married yet. FML

#5998946
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27089) - you deserved it (2580)

On 10/25/2009 at 10:27pm - love - by joyful-not (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up to my 2-year-old daughter hitting me in the face. She had just pooped her nappy and put her hands down her pants to "feel it squish around." FML

#7564644
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24206) - you deserved it (2580)

On 01/25/2010 at 5:18am - kids - by shitface (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend and I came across the topic of school while chatting. He asked me what high school I went to and where I moved from. I have lived here my whole life, he was my crush for four years, and was in my classes throughout those years. He doesn't believe me. FML

#17085145
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30134) - you deserved it (2580)

On 07/12/2011 at 8:51pm - love - by steph2052 - United States (Washington)

Today, I freaked out because of the smell of rotting eggs lingering in my apartment. I soon discovered it was my boyfriend's feet. FML

#19453848
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19631) - you deserved it (2580)

On 04/12/2012 at 1:30am - love - by Kayla (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I rescued a little boy who looked like he was drowning in a public pool. His mother then smacked me in the face for "touching him". FML

#20708781
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43584) - you deserved it (2580)

On 06/06/2013 at 12:13am - kids - by butisavedyourkid - United States

Today, I woke up at 3:00 am to the sound of a bird screeching. Turns out, my roommate bought a parrot without consulting me first. Even better, my roommate expects me to pay for half of the bird's expenses. FML

#21097210
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37124) - you deserved it (2580)

On 03/26/2014 at 7:44pm - animals - by In urgent need of a new roommate - United States (Oregon)

Today, while trying to take my Christmas tree down, I learned that at some point during the last few weeks, it became home to a colony of green ants. I'm now covered in bites and terrified to go anywhere near it. FML

#20426337
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24156) - you deserved it (2579)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:54pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I explained to my roommate that if she kept using all of our kitchen utensils as sex toys and hoarding them because of the varying degrees of orgasms she could achieve, we wouldn't be able to cook or eat in our own house. FML

Today, my mother hacked my Facebook and broke up with my boyfriend and pretended to be me. She told him if he ever talks to me again, she'll call the cops. FML

#18518838
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29309) - you deserved it (2578)

On 12/15/2011 at 10:20am - love - by NinjaWafflesx (woman) - United States



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