Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend asked me what he should get his mother for her birthday. FML

#20011729
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26969) - you deserved it (3288)

On 08/09/2012 at 4:16pm - intimacy - by Badkitty14 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after 3 long hours of mowing the lawn with a rusty lawn mower, my dad finally decided to tell me that he didn't get any money out to pay me with. The reason? He didn't think girls could mow a lawn and was expecting me to give up. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up, and he came by to get his things while I was at work. When I got home I saw that the only thing he had taken was my cat. I only dated him for 5 months, I've had that cat for 14 years. FML

#14078710
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33735) - you deserved it (3287)

On 12/04/2010 at 12:20am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out that since no other procedures are working, I was required to stop eating, and drink a bunch of foul tasting 'goo', which will in turn give me constant diarrhea. This will then prepare me nicely for the long tube with a camera on the end of which will be shoved up my rectum. FML

#14630970
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21359) - you deserved it (3287)

On 01/18/2011 at 8:51pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after telling my mother-in-law about my recent miscarriage, she cheerfully made a cake to celebrate. FML

#20714826
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49000) - you deserved it (3287)

On 06/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anoymous - United States (California)

Today, I excitedly told my family that, after years of studying and dedication, I've been awarded a full scholarship to Germany. My mom's reaction was to start sobbing about me becoming a "heathen" and my dad and brother started telling Nazi jokes. FML

#21237389
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39881) - you deserved it (3287)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:28am - misc - by UnSupported (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I went bowling with my mom and she paid for 2 games. By the 6th frame of game 1 she was bored and to get her money back for both games she told the employees I shit my pants. I'm 17. FML

#79689
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52936) - you deserved it (3286)

On 02/19/2009 at 4:47pm - money - by Noname (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I finally got intimate with my girlfriend, the girl of my dreams. I undressed and, ready to step in bed with her, I see her staring at 'it'. Which was quickly followed by laughter. FML

#5895637
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25415) - you deserved it (3286)

On 10/19/2009 at 1:02pm - intimacy - by Geez (man) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I told my mom I was going on a date tonight. She laughed and didn't believe me. When I tried to convince her it was real, she got mad and grounded me for lying. I had to cancel the date. FML

#7014682
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35329) - you deserved it (3286)

On 12/29/2009 at 1:50pm - love - by Grounded (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was on a date with a guy I've been crushing on. In the middle of the dinner, he said he had to go get something from his car. When I asked what it was, he smiled and said it was a surprise. I waited for my surprise for half an hour. Then I decided to pay the bill and go home and cry. FML

#18976256
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53502) - you deserved it (3286)

On 02/02/2012 at 1:00pm - love - by kingpig (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. The first thing my dad did was comment that given how pretty she looked in our photos, and compared to how she looks in real life, she's amazing at using Photoshop. FML

#20466661
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31204) - you deserved it (3286)

On 01/18/2013 at 6:03pm - love - by dpap - United States (Iowa)

Today, while at a hospital, a prayer group circled me and started praying that God and the good doctors and nurses would heal me from the disease that disfigured my face. I was there to visit my sick grandmother. FML

#20580194
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47761) - you deserved it (3286)

On 04/08/2013 at 2:12am - health - by chinatownhobo (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, I was waitressing at work, when a woman decided to change her baby's nappy on a table. One moment I was asking her to leave, and the next, she was shoving a fully shat-out nappy into my hands. She asked me to get rid of it and fetch her baby wipes. FML

#20863302
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39156) - you deserved it (3286)

On 09/01/2013 at 3:35pm - work - by aisbash (woman) - United States (California)



Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML
  • Hello everyone, how's it going? You doing OK? Friday is the right time to get your glad rags on, go out, meet your friends, have a drink, get your freak on, shoot the breeze, shoot some hoops, don't shoot…

Friday 30 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: