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Today, I was talking with my mother and expressed my slight disappointment at how many of my friends are getting into relationships, whereas I'm still single. My mother decided to encourage me by saying "Don't worry, sweetie. There are boys out there who don't go for looks. You'll be fine". FML

by Anonymous / 06/21/2009 at 4:50am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my coworker told me she knew about my secret boyfriend because she has a "sixth sense" about these things. I'm too embarrassed to tell her I'm desperately single and the last date I went on was three years ago. FML

by single and not mingling / 06/04/2010 at 1:36pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I walked downstairs with a couple of bags full of stuff, in preparation for a sleepover at my friend's house. My nine-year-old cousin looked at me and said, "Where're you going? Fat camp?" FML

by Char / 09/09/2012 at 1:02pm / United Kingdom (Falkirk) / Health

Today, while trucking, I got stuck in traffic on a congested highway. After 15 minutes of mind-numbing boredom, I glanced down at the car beside me, only to witness the driver changing her tampon and flicking the old one onto the highway. I can't unsee this. FML

by thoughtidseenitall / 02/01/2013 at 8:01pm / United States (Colorado) / Transportation

Today, while driving, I saw a car pull over with its hazard lights on. I went to see if they needed help, only to see the guy was jerking off to something on his phone. FML

by someoneneedsassistance / 04/24/2015 at 11:07am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I wanted to be nice to my boyfriend and buy him a cake. Not only did I drop it in the bus, when I got home I forgot that I'd put it on my bed, and sat on it. FML

by MJensen / 05/10/2016 at 5:57pm / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to collect my clothes out of the dryer. Thinking it would be fun for my small dog, I brought her with me. I put her down and let her sniff around while I put my clean clothes in a basket. I turned around from putting more clothes in the dyer to catch her peeing in my clean clothes. FML

by Never Again / 08/09/2016 at 2:17pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend's response to my question about where our relationship was going was, "Let me check what my Celtic Runes have to say about it." FML

by me / 12/05/2011 at 3:05am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my power finally came back on. I excitedly went and spent $100 to refill my fridge, only to come back home and discover the power is out again, and might not be back on for another three days. FML

by eggmarie / 07/10/2012 at 12:12pm / United States (Ohio) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my fiancée broke off our engagement. For some bizarre reason, she'd hidden a pair of expensive boots and her iPad underneath our ride-on mower. I turned the mower on and destroyed both without realizing it. According to her, the fault is all mine. FML

by Wow. Really? / 04/29/2013 at 2:07pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I was helping my elderly neighbor carry her groceries into her kitchen. When I finished, she sighed and said, "You're such a sweet girl. It's just a shame about your face." FML

by neighbor / 01/26/2014 at 8:08am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's been 10 days since my family and I have been visiting France. I've always wanted to try their culinary specialties but my dad says we "can't trust them". We've eaten at McDonald's 9/10 times. FML

by theshire / 08/12/2014 at 2:23am / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Health

Today, a guy tried to pick me up with the line, "You're ugly. Just kidding. You're my date." FML

by thebigtwinkie / 09/10/2014 at 3:52am / Romania (Bucuresti) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.