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Today, I told my mom I was going out to hang out with some friends. She looked me dead in the eye and said, "Don't lie to me." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16421) - you deserved it (1535)
On 05/27/2012 at 4:00am - misc - by cloudberry - United States (New York)
Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25557) - you deserved it (1535)
On 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm - kids - by ananymous - United States (New York)
Today, my boss gave me the task of firing a recently-hired coworker next Friday. This guy spends most of his off-hours working out, probably abusing the fuck out of steroids, and to whom prison is like a bed-and-breakfast. I fear for my life by this point. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22265) - you deserved it (1535)
On 03/01/2013 at 1:22pm - work - by cthulhu help me (man) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I had to explain to a patient that no, her nipples were not slowly getting smaller. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16462) - you deserved it (1535)
On 10/11/2011 at 5:43am - work - by Anony-moose (woman) - United States
Today, while watching a man in front of me on the bus remove his cap to scratch his noggin, I noticed the swarm of dandruff that was about to nail me in my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18660) - you deserved it (1534)
On 11/21/2011 at 11:23am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I fractured a bone in my knee. Now not only do I have to wear a huge knee brace for the next two months, I'll have to sit around in a hotel room all of next week while my family has fun skiing in the mountains. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15807) - you deserved it (1534)
On 03/30/2012 at 9:43pm - health - by Fractured - United States
Today, my mother told me that the carbon-monoxide alarm went off last night, but since she didn't smell any gas, she decided to just remove the batteries and go back to bed. I had to explain to her that you can't smell carbon monoxide, and that we could have died in our sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34695) - you deserved it (1533)
On 02/06/2010 at 1:22pm - misc - by Kelso (woman) - United States
Today, my parents bought a new car with the money they made from selling mine. To make up for selling my car without telling me, they let me choose the make, model, and colour of the new car... which I just found out I'm not allowed to drive. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20267) - you deserved it (1533)
On 02/27/2010 at 11:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)
Today, campus security called me to let me know a lawnmower crashed into my car. Apparently the guy mowing the lawn lost control. My car wasn't parked by any grass. I need a new bumper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19210) - you deserved it (1533)
On 09/28/2011 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I was pitching at a fastpitch softball game. The other team chanted about the ball being too high and almost hitting the batter in the eye. After throwing the next pitch, the ball was savagely returned by the batter, straight into my eyes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13073) - you deserved it (1533)
On 08/08/2012 at 12:00pm - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, the driver's side window of my car was busted, and inside was a note that said, "Sorry, thought this was my car." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27252) - you deserved it (1532)
On 07/01/2011 at 4:31am - misc - by Rick - United States (California)
Today, my neighborhood had its annual summer barbecue, and I ended up showing a little boy who lives down the street how to hit a baseball. When I gave him back his bat so he could try for himself, he swung it into my shin and yelled, "Tag! You're it!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (15108) - you deserved it (1532)
On 06/25/2012 at 12:09pm - kids - by bcoper (man) - Switzerland (Luzern)
Today, I found my fiancé is cheating on me. Our wedding is in 26 days and everything is already paid for. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26780) - you deserved it (1532)
On 10/30/2012 at 3:34pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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