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Today, the McDonald's in my town ran out of fries. I was the one who had to tell all the angry customers we had no more fries in the store. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2013 at 3:24am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, my mom took a picture of me. All she could say about the picture was, "At least your sister is pretty." FML

by MH / 01/24/2014 at 7:36am / Norway (Rogaland) / Love

Today, my boyfriend told me he always thought the female orgasm was an urban legend. FML

by 310 / 10/09/2009 at 2:42am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was told that in order to be considered for more jobs, I should remove my college degree from my resume. FML

by JoannaG25 / 08/17/2010 at 7:43am / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Work

Today, I went to an elementary school for volunteer work. I was asked to read to a group of kids during one of the classes. Before I started reading, a girl raised her hand and asked me if I had a boyfriend and if I was single. I asked her why and she said "My daddy wanted to know." I'm 16. FML

by LaRae17 / 08/04/2010 at 10:40am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I rummaged around in the attic, looking for old pictures of me and my family, so I could make a surprise collage. Instead, I found my dad's old journals, talking about how desperately he didn't want a kid, and how he wanted to leave my mother more and more every day that passed since I was born. FML

by surfergal91 / 02/14/2011 at 3:12pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my wedding day. I have a cold sore that makes me look like The Joker. Make-up won't cover it and the emergency medicine my doctor gave me only irritates it more. My future husband asks, "Why so serious?" and laughs whenever he sees me. Fantastic. FML

by sharibaby / 04/30/2013 at 5:26pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister backed out of my wedding because it was becoming too much about me. After I begged her to reconsider, I had no choice but to pick a new bridesmaid. When my new bridesmaid posted on Facebook how excited she was, my sister commented, "See, you made HER feel special." FML

by chumpslolo / 07/25/2013 at 6:55am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my roommate was making a waterproof iPhone case and decided to use my phone to test it out. It didn't work. FML

by Crombinator / 05/01/2015 at 1:30am / United States (Oregon) / Geek

Today, I went to my girlfriend's and she was wearing some sexy lingerie. After making out passionately for 10 minutes, I started to undress myself, only to have her stop me, confessed that she still wasn't sexually attracted to me. FML

by Anonymous / 09/11/2009 at 1:04pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I went speed dating. I arrived at my first date and she looked me up and down and said, "Oh, that's awkward." FML

by nikto / 06/02/2011 at 9:01pm / Love

Today, I woke up to my two year old crawling in bed with me and saying, "I poop". Normally this would be ok, but this morning she decided she didn't need a diaper. FML

by Eringobrag88 / 06/27/2011 at 12:08pm / United States / Kids

Today, I was brutally run over by a man in a wheelchair. FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2011 at 1:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous