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Today, while working as a cashier at McDonald's, a man came in telling me that he had not received his hamburger. I looked at his receipt and the date said 11/17/09. FML

#16970431
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32753) - you deserved it (3504)

On 07/04/2011 at 5:42am - work - by crudofalife - United States (Illinois)

Today, my school's 6'2, 270-pound, 375-pound bench-pressing football superstar knocked me unconscious in one hit. With a dodgeball. FML

#18844690
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32617) - you deserved it (3504)

On 01/18/2012 at 2:57pm - health - by Shameful (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was debating with my now ex-boyfriend over the ethics of using torture in interrogations of suspected criminals. It took just ten minutes before he freely admitted that he'd have no problem "torturing the shit" out of me if he even suspected I was seeing another man. FML

#20015148
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20735) - you deserved it (3504)

On 08/11/2012 at 12:38pm - love - by what the actual fuck (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, saying, "I'm not ready for a serious relationship." We're supposed to get married in a month. FML

#20802342
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57408) - you deserved it (3504)

On 07/25/2013 at 1:47am - love - by anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had to accept the fact that I'm going bald, after I noticed the hair on my chest is longer than the hair on my head. FML

#21037094
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36935) - you deserved it (3504)

On 01/23/2014 at 12:13pm - health - by Hairy_Potter (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, though I'm normally unperturbed by my single-ness, I walked by some squirrels engaged in mating rituals and felt a pang of jealousy. FML

#5133
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28969) - you deserved it (3503)

On 02/02/2009 at 5:49am - love - by murphy - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was finally discharged from hospital after being in there for one month, I arrive home to find a letter from a debt collection agency for my unpaid car insurance premium, and another letter from my car insurer to say that they aren't covering my accident due to non payment of premium. FML

#6339053
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26109) - you deserved it (3503)

On 11/17/2009 at 6:48am - misc - by Chriso (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was attacked by clowns at work. I don't work at the circus. FML

#14894865
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31946) - you deserved it (3503)

On 02/08/2011 at 11:27am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had a relaxing night watching movies with my room-mates. Everyone but I had a girl over to lie with during the movie. The closest I got all night was the multiple times my room-mate's dog tried to mount me. FML

#18118791
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28176) - you deserved it (3503)

On 10/31/2011 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Hollywoodanonymous (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, a drunk dude walked up to me and said, "You're ugly as fuck." His sober friend quickly apologized and explained that he was wasted, before looking me up and down and adding "Well, not completely, I guess." FML

#20801990
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46307) - you deserved it (3503)

On 07/24/2013 at 10:33pm - misc - by GeeThanks (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my wackjob roommate decided to sit next to me on the couch, basically make out with her pet rabbit, and baby-talk to it. Key highlights involved giggling while the bunny licked up inside her nose and then commenting on the rabbit's "pronounced nipples". Why? FML

#20848347
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39093) - you deserved it (3503)

On 08/21/2013 at 8:09pm - animals - by Jade (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while cleaning up, I dropped a box of thumbtacks, spilling them all over the floor. As I fumbled to pick them up, the power went out. FML

#5589145
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46820) - you deserved it (3502)

On 10/01/2009 at 6:31pm - misc - by Ouchies (woman) - United States (Florida) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, it was my turn to do the suite's dishes. I was in the process of drying my roommate's coffee mug when the handle suddenly snapped off and the sharp edge left on the mug scraped down my arm. I now have a 3-inch long gash in my arm. I was attacked by a cheap coffee mug. FML

#6351303
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22619) - you deserved it (3502)

On 11/18/2009 at 2:03am - misc - by disheshateme (woman) - United States (Alabama)



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