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Today, I was on a three hour flight to Los Angeles for a corporate meeting. The woman next to me instantly fell asleep and snored louder than a freight train, while the kid behind me made a hobby of thashing my seat from behind. When I peered over and asked him to stop, he spat in my face. FML

#15887024
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32127) - you deserved it (3076)

On 04/22/2011 at 2:43pm - work - by Ashleigh - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I have come to the point in my life where I need to Google how to stop excessive back sweat. FML

#17851509
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20656) - you deserved it (3076)

On 09/27/2011 at 10:18pm - health - by MissPerspirent (woman) - Canada

Today, I checked my email after a week of no cell reception or internet while I was stuck at a family holiday cottage. There was an email offering me the RA job I've been trying to get for almost a year, telling me congratulations and to reply by Friday if I accepted. Last Friday. FML

#6960951
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25875) - you deserved it (3075)

On 12/26/2009 at 7:34pm - work - by Humbug (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was getting frisky with my fiancée when she started talking about her dead great-grandma. FML

#13415176
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22465) - you deserved it (3075)

On 10/12/2010 at 12:48am - intimacy - by tdiz - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a little girl wandered into the glass-cleaning area of the pub I work at. It's a dangerous place for a little kid, so I took her hand and asked where her mum was. The kid starts screaming and the mother appears in the doorway shouting "GET AWAY FROM MY BABY!" FML

#15967561
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30744) - you deserved it (3075)

On 04/28/2011 at 7:13pm - work - by srsly_what (man) - United Kingdom (North Yorkshire)

Today, a hornet thought it would be fun to fly into a candle that I had lit. As the hornet burned to death, it flung its charred body at my face, which is more painful than it sounds. FML

#20936891
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39286) - you deserved it (3075)

On 10/28/2013 at 4:18pm - misc - by Asshole hornet - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend bought me a pair of jeans. I couldn't fit into them, and he reacted to this by saying I've gotten too fat for him, and he can't be with me anymore. I took them off and saw they were a size 4. I've been a size 8 for the past 2 years, and he knows this. FML

#21008500
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41387) - you deserved it (3075)

On 12/28/2013 at 5:34pm - health - by worstwaytodumpagirl (woman) - United Kingdom (Harrow)

Today, I logged onto facebook to realize that my boyfriend is now listed as single. News to me. FML

#13746
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42555) - you deserved it (3074)

On 02/07/2009 at 6:04pm - misc - by klv8 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was fired from the babysitting job I have had for 2 years. I thought maybe the mother had found out that I sometimes let her kids stay up late and have extra sweets. The real reason, as she told me, was that she didn't want her kids loving anyone more than they love her. FML

#3949898
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52142) - you deserved it (3073)

On 07/22/2009 at 8:17am - work - by babysitter93 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I felt dizzy and light-headed. So I sat down at the top of my stairs calling my brother who was downstairs, for help because I was scared something was wrong with me. He called back "No, I'm eating." I fainted. When I woke up, I was still alone upstairs and he was still eating downstairs. FML

#6436663
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28006) - you deserved it (3073)

On 11/24/2009 at 3:07pm - health - by Foodcomesfirst (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was driving out to a concert I've been excited about for months. I was using my GPS to guide me to the venue. It decided to guide me to an abandoned warehouse in the middle of town. FML

#20021994
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17470) - you deserved it (3073)

On 08/15/2012 at 2:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I lost my dog and so I put up 'lost' signs. As I was coming back home I noticed one had been written on. It said: "Found your dog. Keeping it". FML

#20556107
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48195) - you deserved it (3073)

On 03/23/2013 at 7:43am - animals - by Hurrikhan - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, my weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist and thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a red laser light through his window. I was on the stairs when he ran past, screaming bloody murder, sending me down a flight of steps. FML

#20919796
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41859) - you deserved it (3073)

On 10/14/2013 at 3:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)



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