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Today, I cut my finger at work while chopping some vegetables. I grabbed the nearest rag I could to stop the bleeding and put it on the cut. I didn't know the rag had just been used to clean up a lemon juice spill. FML

#7967953
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32928) - you deserved it (3455)

On 02/07/2010 at 9:18am - work - by Ryan - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was watching a home video of when my mom was pregnant with me. She had a beer in her hand. FML

#16966151
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42760) - you deserved it (3455)

On 07/03/2011 at 10:02pm - health - by wastedbaby - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend of 6 months broke up with me because he felt "our religious differences kept us apart." We've never talked about anything religious. Ever. FML

#13008973
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26871) - you deserved it (3454)

On 09/11/2010 at 8:39pm - love - by fmlimoverit - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that the blind man I've been helping for months at the grocery store by carrying his shopping around and stuff was actually faking his blindness. FML

#13442719
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27634) - you deserved it (3454)

On 10/14/2010 at 4:19am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my fiancé, the love of my life, informed me that he proposed because he was sure I'd say no. He was hoping it would lead to our breakup. FML

#16605468
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43319) - you deserved it (3454)

On 06/11/2011 at 1:47am - love - by Username - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my fiancé decided he wants to buy an engagement ring for his mother, so that she doesn't feel left out. FML

#18135623
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38926) - you deserved it (3454)

On 11/02/2011 at 12:49am - love - by heatherjo - United States

Today, I was getting a bikini wax to prove to my husband that I could be sexy despite being five months pregnant. As the woman was applying the wax, she said, "You know, if I wanted to, I'm in the perfect spot to reach in and steal that baby." FML

#20097870
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27171) - you deserved it (3454)

On 10/02/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and my best friend making out. She claimed he was just tasting her lipstick. FML

#20784153
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50314) - you deserved it (3454)

On 07/15/2013 at 12:47pm - love - by leeceetaylor99 - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered that I have caught head lice from my son. Unfortunately, they are living in my chest hair. FML

#20902262
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36205) - you deserved it (3454)

On 09/30/2013 at 5:59pm - health - by hairy (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my dad decided to clean his muddy shoes right beside me by clapping them together, causing mud to fly all over me. This wouldn't have been a problem had I not been wearing my white wedding dress just before getting married. FML

#20989738
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56043) - you deserved it (3454)

On 12/12/2013 at 12:31am - misc - by >.> (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I saw a picture of me from a night of drinking that surprisingly looked really really good. I showed my boyfriend and he agreed with me. Then he added, "What's funny is it looks nothing like you!" FML

#7215192
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22714) - you deserved it (3453)

On 01/08/2010 at 10:09am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my throat is really swollen so I can only drink liquid. I noticed home-made ice-lollies in the freezer and had one. It tasted funny. Turns out my little brother had peed in one of those ice-lolly box and put it in the freezer. FML

Today, my dad had a go at me because he thought I was embarrassed by him and that was why I never invited any of my friends over. I was too embarrassed to tell him it's actually because I don't have any friends to invite over. FML

#14319411
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27795) - you deserved it (3453)

On 12/24/2010 at 2:15am - misc - by nerdwithagun (man) - United States (Texas)



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