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Today, my dad decided to clean my 20 gallon fish tank. I had 6 fish. One of them was called a transparent fish, clear with a bright orange tail, which was my favorite. My dad didn't see it, and dumped the water out along with it. FML

#6254923
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31231) - you deserved it (3471)

On 11/11/2009 at 6:28am - animals - by dEpPrEsSeDgIrL (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I drove my boyfriend to hospital because he felt extremely ill. His buddies had gotten their hands on a taser, and he had the brilliant idea of being shot as part of a Youtube stunt video. Now I have an empty gas tank and have to clean up a puddle of vomit in my living room. FML

#16377162
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28313) - you deserved it (3471)

On 05/27/2011 at 8:04pm - misc - by moron - United States

Today, while I was peacefully sleeping, I felt a hand suddenly slap my forehead. Then fingers began to press against my mouth, then nose, then eyes. I finally woke up to my girlfriend laughing hysterically. She'd confused me with her clock-radio. FML

#18814667
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28114) - you deserved it (3471) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/15/2012 at 1:14pm - love - by Vitriol (man) - France

Today, my dad got me a GPS for my birthday. I appreciate the sentiment, but I don't have a permit or a car. FML

#20910835
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40728) - you deserved it (3471)

On 10/07/2013 at 11:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I rang British Gas to cancel my boiler cover, as I'm totally and utterly skint. I told her the reason was I was getting divorced, moving house, losing my job and had no income at all. She was very sympathetic, and said "how would you like to pay your £37 cancellation fee?" FML

#6343049
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23790) - you deserved it (3470)

On 11/17/2009 at 4:33pm - misc - by shellbom (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML

#6389255
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43038) - you deserved it (3470)

On 11/21/2009 at 6:40am - animals - by AussieGirl (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found a video of my girlfriend having sex with her male best friend on her computer. When I confronted her about it she said it was from before we met. In the video, she was wearing the engagement ring I bought her. FML

#13221362
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58359) - you deserved it (3470)

On 09/27/2010 at 11:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a panic attack. Not on a crowded train, or an airplane, or in school, or any of the expected places. It was in my yoga class, which my therapist recommended for me, while I was in a dead-body position. FML

#18174225
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23746) - you deserved it (3470)

On 11/06/2011 at 12:43pm - health - by panickygrl (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was on a train when we hit and killed a person. We were stalled for 4 hours. The guy sitting next to me asked what I did for a living, so I told him that I'm a vet tech. Then he showed me his infected elbow. FML

#17620376
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26985) - you deserved it (3470)

On 08/30/2011 at 10:51am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend of five years was in a bad car crash, and ended up with a concussion. He didn't remember me. At all. But he remembered his other girlfriend he had cheated on me with for two months. FML

#18210187
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47703) - you deserved it (3470)

On 11/10/2011 at 1:22pm - love - by Nicoli - United States (Washington)

Today, I overheard my boyfriend and his friends talking in the next room. I smiled when my boyfriend called me beautiful, only to hear his friend laugh and say, "C'mon, dude. She has fat ankles and smells like deli meat." FML

#20127779
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24956) - you deserved it (3470)

On 10/22/2012 at 1:29am - love - by sausagefingers (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I put my ironing board away in the bathroom. After closing the door, I heard a loud noise. The board had opened up while falling over, taking up the width of the room. I can't open the door. FML

#19533059
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24576) - you deserved it (3470) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/26/2012 at 4:45pm - misc - by Magicgwen - Sent from mobile version

Today, my English teacher kicked me out of class for being "rude and disruptive." In actuality, I had called her out for having blatantly used Google Translate for several example sentences, all of which sounded as if a semi-literate foreigner had constructed them. FML

#19755806
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21038) - you deserved it (3470)

On 06/08/2012 at 3:45pm - misc - by hackshack (man) - Brazil (Rio Grande do Sul)



Juliette Bubulle's illustrated FML

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  • It's the weekend so let's plaster on a fake smile and plough through this shit one more time. Sorry, I was channelling Bill Hicks there. I'll start again. Hi everyone, how are you doing? This week…

Friday 29 May 2015

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