Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was at a party with my boyfriend of one year when an attractive girl walks over. She asks him, "Is this your girlfriend?" He replied "That depends... are you single?" FML

#6404510
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45964) - you deserved it (3606)

On 11/22/2009 at 12:49pm - love - by Rejected. (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, my boyfriend asked me why I chose to date him. After going on for five minutes about how unique and funny he is, I ask him the same question. His reply? "You were the first person to ask me out." He then rolled over and fell asleep. FML

#6648301
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26482) - you deserved it (3606)

On 12/07/2009 at 9:43am - misc - by Fluory (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I asked my mom why she decided to be a parent. She replied, in all seriousness, "Everyone else was doing it." FML

#13321505
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27053) - you deserved it (3606)

On 10/04/2010 at 8:57pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, it's my birthday. The present I received from my best friend was the exact same necklace which I gave to her for her birthday two months ago. It had been unwrapped and re-wrapped in the same paper. FML

#17063593
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33156) - you deserved it (3606)

On 07/11/2011 at 5:00am - misc - by Vic (woman) - Denmark

Today, I explained to my dad that I think I have a vaginal infection. I asked if he could take me to the doctor. He responded by saying, "Just shove some ice up there. It'll go away." FML

#18850090
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33422) - you deserved it (3606)

On 01/19/2012 at 12:14am - health - by hurts.to.pee - United States

Today, I honked at a man in a Subway parking lot. He rolled down his window and screamed insults and slurs at me before driving away. Why did I honk at him? He'd left his lunch on top of his car. FML

#20737996
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40336) - you deserved it (3606)

On 06/20/2013 at 10:17pm - misc - by just trying to be nice (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my fiance told me that he no longer loves me, that he still has feelings for an ex. The wedding is off and he needs the ring back to give to the right woman. FML

#6280
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73903) - you deserved it (3605)

On 02/03/2009 at 12:08pm - love - by nolongerengaged (woman) - United States

Today, I had to make a doctor's appointment for my daughter. Apparently she thought it would be better to wipe herself with Clorox tough scrub disinfecting wipes than tell me she'd caught an STD. FML

#18926603
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31874) - you deserved it (3605)

On 01/27/2012 at 5:03pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, someone came into the store I work at, laughed at my name on my name-tag, and left without even buying anything. FML

#20747987
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37546) - you deserved it (3605)

On 06/26/2013 at 5:07am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my friend asked if she could come over to my place. Since it's my birthday tomorrow, I said sure. Turns out she just wants to copy all my notes for our upcoming exam. FML

#20871829
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40577) - you deserved it (3605)

On 09/07/2013 at 6:22pm - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, someone commented on my mother's memorial page on my blog. It said "u need too get over it bitch" and "ur mum was a wh0re". I looked up the IP address and found the comment was posted from my own wifi. The only other person who lives in my house is my girlfriend. FML

#21297662
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44786) - you deserved it (3605)

On 11/12/2014 at 12:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Redcar and Cleveland)

Today, I went to the dry-cleaner's and went to get my bag of laundry from my trunk, but I ended up dropping the bag. My dirty underwear blew around the parking lot. I had to chase it all down as a bunch of people looked on. FML

#21320377
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29203) - you deserved it (3605)

On 12/19/2014 at 2:24pm - misc - by embarrassed - United States

Today, my girlfriend of almost a year, and to whom I intended to propose on Thanksgiving, dumped me because her husband will be returning from Iraq soon. And he wants to have a "talk" with me. I didn't know she was married. FML

#6442976
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40817) - you deserved it (3604)

On 11/25/2009 at 8:56am - love - by blasted (man) - United States (Tennessee)



FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #17
  • It's here! Yep, time once more to delve into the darkest corners of the FML postbag and check out the stuff that never would've seen the light of day, had we not had a vicious streak in our brains. It's…

Tuesday 25 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: