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Today, I put a blue toilet cleaner square in the back of toilet. My fiancé called me later on freaking out because he couldn't get the "blue water to go away" when he flushed. FML

#18447759
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21373) - you deserved it (2868)

On 12/06/2011 at 8:38pm - love - by sparklethelette - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was cleaning up litter from the street, when a guy asked who I work for. I said nobody and that I was just doing some community service. Before I could clarify that it was voluntary community service, he called me a "piece of shit delinquent", spat on me, and walked off. FML

#20898099
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39309) - you deserved it (2868)

On 09/27/2013 at 3:01pm - misc - by sigh (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I got a call from the girl I like. I got very excited so I quickly picked up. As it turns out, she was actually prank calling me, pretending to be a "liposuction telemarketer" but forgot to press *67. FML

#20980172
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40059) - you deserved it (2868)

On 12/04/2013 at 3:50am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I came into work with a new hair cut and so far everyone has asked me If I lost a bet. FML

#5127
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24393) - you deserved it (2867)

On 02/02/2009 at 5:39am - work - by Xpresss - United States (California)

Today, I logged onto facebook to realize that my boyfriend is now listed as single. News to me. FML

#13746
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39945) - you deserved it (2867)

On 02/07/2009 at 6:04pm - misc - by klv8 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that the white marks on my pillow aren't from me drooling in my sleep like I originally thought. My roommate used my pillow to help support her lower back during intercourse with her hookup from last night. FML

#14948689
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33315) - you deserved it (2867)

On 02/12/2011 at 11:29am - intimacy - by KaraAnn17 - United States (Ohio)

Today, after months of looking forward to my new fencing lessons and speculating endlessly about the people who might be in my class, I went to my first lesson. I was the only one who showed up. FML

#17739609
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19810) - you deserved it (2867)

On 09/13/2011 at 9:30pm - misc - by ManinBlack (man) - Canada

Today, I got a picture message from my aunt that said, "9 out of 10 kids get their awesomeness from their aunt." Normally, I would have agreed, except she forgot my birthday yesterday. FML

#20677224
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35039) - you deserved it (2867)

On 05/21/2013 at 3:32am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, my friend set me up with a cute guy who is very germaphobic. So, I spent 4 hours cleaning my apartment. 2 minutes into the date, I sneezed. He politely told me he wasn't feeling well and left. FML

#18669836
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24769) - you deserved it (2866)

On 01/01/2012 at 12:41am - love - by upsetandannoyed - United States (New York)

Today, while in the restroom washing my hands, a girl decided to let one rip while in the stall. When she came out she gave me a dirty look of disgust and said, "At least wait until I leave." She and I were the only ones in the restroom. FML

#20841231
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43266) - you deserved it (2866)

On 08/17/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by mugres22 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to endure a long drive from Poland to England. We weren't allowed to open our windows. My mum threw up. Twice. FML

#12430167
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28302) - you deserved it (2865)

On 08/10/2010 at 9:46am - health - by travelsickness - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, after running a couple of miles, I went upstairs into my air-conditioned room to cool off. Apparently, my mom walked past my room and heard me breathing heavily. Later, she had my dad give me a talk about masturbation. FML

#17022194
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32174) - you deserved it (2865)

On 07/08/2011 at 12:20am - intimacy - by chumleevil - United States (Maine)

Today, I was admitted to the hospital for chronic constipation. I have to share a room with two other girls who are also having bowel problems. We're all on strong laxatives, and there's apparently only one bathroom in this place. FML

#20613283
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44971) - you deserved it (2865)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:10pm - health - by shatMyself - United States



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