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Today, my parents asked if they could borrow my car. Why? Because they were going to see someone about a Craig's List ad and wanted to look poor. FML

#5657528
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33332) - you deserved it (3119)

On 10/05/2009 at 3:38am - money - by poorcar (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, after spending the night at my boyfriend's house, I was heading out the door when he called me back to hand me something I had left at his house a while ago. It was one of my bras. It wasn't until I got home I noticed the cup size was a B. I'm a size D. FML

#5793805
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35962) - you deserved it (3119)

On 10/12/2009 at 10:03am - love - by Jennagirl (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML

#16474078
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44007) - you deserved it (3119)

On 06/02/2011 at 9:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went shopping with my mom. I went into my department and tried on some clothes. After a few minutes, there is an announcement that a child has gone missing. Staff are searching the store. I see my mom and she hugs me in tears and yells, "I found her!" I'm almost 17. FML

#17986846
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37008) - you deserved it (3119)

On 10/15/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by Ania (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found my elderly neighbour on all fours in my garden eating my flowers. FML

#20836671
111 comments

Today, I asked a guy out on a coffee date, and we started talking about our mutual careers. At the end of the date he asked me if I had any more questions about job opportunities or any more advice, then shook my hand and gave me his contact card. FML

#5748
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22859) - you deserved it (3118)

On 02/02/2009 at 7:54pm - love - by myrie (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend was really depressed. I listed the top 50 reasons why I love her. Her response was "thanks for that but seriously, this video on youtube is hilarious." I couldn't cheer her up but apparently a 10 second video of a dog running in circles can. FML

#8238401
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26089) - you deserved it (3118)

On 02/14/2010 at 3:48am - love - by Samson (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my parents informed that the man I am going to marry made the newspaper, on page twelve. He is listed as a fugitive and there is a warrant out for his arrest. FML

#19982796
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23947) - you deserved it (3118)

On 07/25/2012 at 1:27am - misc - by strangebeans (woman) - United States

Today, my brother joked that our dog was more attractive than I was. I looked to my mom for support, and she said "Well, she is pure bred." FML

#63875
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35648) - you deserved it (3117)

On 02/17/2009 at 9:52pm - animals - by Noname (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got demoted from my manager's position, only to be replaced by a 21 year old who has never worked in retail in her life. I now have to spend the next month teaching her my job so they can fire me. FML

#15049361
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31532) - you deserved it (3117)

On 02/20/2011 at 6:49am - work - by lisha182 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while grieving over the loss of my Grandpa, I called my girlfriend for comfort. After I had cheered up, she said, "Don't worry, he went to Hell anyway." FML

#20679293
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41627) - you deserved it (3117)

On 05/22/2013 at 3:14am - misc - by SadPuppy - United States

Today, to be nice, I baked cookies for my step-mom as a birthday present. I burnt my hand while putting them in the oven, but I'd hoped it would be worth it. When she got home, I gave one for her to try. She took a bite, spit it out, and threw it on the floor, asking if it was a joke or if I was really trying to poison her. FML

#12538079
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27791) - you deserved it (3116)

On 08/15/2010 at 12:05pm - health - by shinee - Singapore

Today, I overheard my husband talking to our 6 year-old about animals for a project. I listened, thinking it was cute, until my husband said gleefully, "Remember to say this in your project: octopuses have 8 testicles." FML

#17973930
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26508) - you deserved it (3116)

On 10/13/2011 at 8:24am - kids - by daddoesn'tknowbest - United States



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