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Today, it's my two year anniversary with my wife. She's celebrating the day with her new boyfriend. FML

#13498191
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30819) - you deserved it (2671)

On 10/18/2010 at 12:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, instead of going to a romantic dinner with my boyfriend like I'd planned, I ended up babysitting his queasy little sister. FML

#13925206
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16586) - you deserved it (2671)

On 11/21/2010 at 1:36pm - kids - by kaileekat517 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out my boyfriend thinks I'm too high maintenance because I have a chronic illness which requires frequent hospitalization. FML

#9059310
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25891) - you deserved it (2671)

On 03/13/2010 at 10:17pm - health - by bobby - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my insane boss decided I poop too much. Now, every time I go to the bathroom, he follows me in and tries to get me to hurry up by reading passages from 50 Shades of Grey. FML

#20009332
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24516) - you deserved it (2671)

On 08/08/2012 at 9:53am - work - by blakeintheoffice - United States

Today, I installed high performance brakes on my car after fearing that my old brake system was to weak and I could get into a crash. On the test drive a car in front of me stopped short. My new brakes worked, the ones on the car behind me didn't. I now have whiplash and a totalled car. FML

#1861199
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42308) - you deserved it (2670)

On 05/11/2009 at 11:13pm - misc - by Lex (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I took a friend out for what I thought was date. After dinner was over and I paid, she pulled the bill out and wrote her name phone number on it for the waiter. FML

#51117
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41925) - you deserved it (2670)

On 02/16/2009 at 1:41am - misc - by Noname (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got mugged. As the guys who took my purse were about to walk away, my cellphone rang in my pocket. FML

#16812585
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34906) - you deserved it (2670)

On 06/23/2011 at 4:54am - money - by alo1434 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up with bowel problems which have been causing me to violently pass wind every couple of minutes. I have to spend the next two hours sitting an exam in dead silence. FML

#16607175
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30517) - you deserved it (2670)

On 06/11/2011 at 4:48am - health - by pleasestop (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was working at my day-camp, and one of my little boys told me he had to show me something important. He proudly showed me that he'd crapped his pants. I had to wipe his ass clean. FML

#19039920
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20469) - you deserved it (2670)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:51am - kids - by ilana (woman) - United States

Today, I met up on a blind date. He took a phone call one drink in and said he had to leave because he didn't know it was his buddy's birthday, and they were having a party without him. I offered to split the bill and put out a $20. He got up, unlocked the bicycle behind us and rode off. FML

#20927940
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34016) - you deserved it (2670)

On 10/20/2013 at 7:21pm - love - by single (woman) - United States

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school today. She had been telling the teacher, "I have a huge boner." Apparently, some of the kids at school told her it meant 'headache' and she's been saying it all day. FML

#20928358
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38087) - you deserved it (2670)

On 10/20/2013 at 11:51pm - kids - by momaaa1342 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I came back home to find that my house had been robbed, one week after my neighbors. I was walking around my neighborhood to see if anything was suspicious, and discovered that my neighbors had put up a sign, reading: "Rob the neighbors, THEY don't have a security system." FML

#17893570
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30453) - you deserved it (2669)

On 10/03/2011 at 2:08am - misc - by TheAnnoyedNeighbor - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend called me and he was very upset, crying that he had been betrayed. He then began to explain that his friend had slept with his ex-girlfriend. I asked why he was so upset, and he said he still loved her, and really thought they were going to be able to work things out. FML

#3679896
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53652) - you deserved it (2668)

On 07/11/2009 at 11:18pm - love - by Hopeless (woman) - United States (Florida)



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