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Saturday 26 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I actually considered my boyfriend romantic and deserving of an award when he didn't fart after sex. FML

#20488602
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32476) - you deserved it (6001)

On 02/01/2013 at 2:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend was in the shower and his phone was buzzing with calls and texts. Concerned as his nan is in ICU, I picked it up to find he's been secretly sexting his ex-girlfriend. FML

#20474595
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46961) - you deserved it (5505)

On 01/23/2013 at 8:57am - intimacy - by heartbroken (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to the grocery store with my boyfriend. I wasn't feeling well so I wasn't paying too much attention to his usual antics. Since he thought I was ignoring him, he decided to grab me roughly by the stomach to give me a hug. I ended up puking right in the middle of the aisle. FML

#20484554
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29136) - you deserved it (2926)

On 01/29/2013 at 9:51am - health - by oh no (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I finally found the courage to ask a guy I like out for a drink. He accepted, we drank, and when it came time to go home, I half-drunkenly left him my number. Once I got back home, I realized I'd actually given him my dad's number instead. FML

#20489080
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10817) - you deserved it (28605)

On 02/01/2013 at 2:59pm - love - by 3some? uh, no (woman) - Dominican Republic

Today, as I was leaving for my chemistry exam, I stepped on one of the countless sheets of chemistry notes that littered the floor following last night's studying. I managed to slip and knock myself out in my own living room. FML

#20489863
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23379) - you deserved it (5867)

On 02/02/2013 at 2:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, at my retail job, a woman came to my till with her purchases. After I scanned all her items, she handed me two small bags. One was filled with nickels and dimes. The other was filled with cents. Her total was $28.53. The coins amounted to $22.30. FML

#20490092
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29785) - you deserved it (2335)

On 02/02/2013 at 9:53am - work - by fuckedbyretail (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was talking to my grandma and I mentioned the fact that tomatoes are technically fruit. It's been an hour and she's still yelling, accusing me of lying to her. FML

#20473723
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24774) - you deserved it (4123)

On 01/22/2013 at 8:35pm - misc - by I should have kept my mouth shut - United States (California)

Today, I realised that my friend hasn't spoken to me for a week. A week ago I politely explained to her that I really don't believe in horoscopes, and asked her at the time to stop systematically using my star-sign to explain my behaviour. FML

#20476356
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22981) - you deserved it (4260)

On 01/24/2013 at 11:37am - misc - by notsuperstitious (woman) - Finland

Today, my boss put me on suspension for violating company policy by having non-work related mail in my inbox. They were spam emails. FML

#20478634
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27786) - you deserved it (1895)

On 01/25/2013 at 8:04pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, most of my neighbours came to my house in an angry mob to complain about my dog barking. I don't have a dog. FML

#20488553
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28818) - you deserved it (1948)

On 02/01/2013 at 1:09am - animals - by Angry Mob - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was on the treadmill at the gym, when I felt my pants start slipping. I tried to pull them up, but lost my balance and fell face-first onto the floor. When I go to my wedding tomorrow, half the guests will probably think I've exchanged my fiancé for Chris Brown. FML

#20489307
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28216) - you deserved it (4040)

On 02/01/2013 at 6:31pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Brazil

Today, I spun off the road and into a ditch. The insurance company told me I'd have to wait an hour, as they had other cars to tow first. I had to pee so badly that I resorted to using the only thing I had in my car: a plastic bag. That's when I got a knock on my window from the tow truck driver. FML

#20489830
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25632) - you deserved it (5397)

On 02/02/2013 at 1:57am - misc - by merp. (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, a cyclone hit my city. Though everywhere else is flooding, my house is fine. Well, that was until the toilet decided to overflow and regurgitate the entire town's sewerage. So now my only bathroom is covered in sewage, and I can't go anywhere else because of the flooding. FML

#20481750
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26303) - you deserved it (1815)

On 01/27/2013 at 6:47pm - health - by shitday - Australia (Queensland)



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