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Saturday 12 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my mother-in-law gave me a bottle of champagne for my birthday. This is the third year in a row she has done this. I'm a recovering alcoholic, and she's well aware of that fact. FML

#20462057
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31325) - you deserved it (1875)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:36am - health - by Ari (woman) -

Today, I got genuinely annoyed at myself when I realised I probably lack the skills to survive a Zombie apocalypse. FML

#20449927
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9476) - you deserved it (20484)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by drake86 - United Kingdom (Argyll and Bute)

Today, I have severe back pain that is only relieved by lying flat on my bed. I also have acid reflux that is only prevented by sitting straight up. FML

#20453200
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31772) - you deserved it (1683)

On 01/11/2013 at 3:03am - health - by Kftc88 - United States (California)

Today, I opened the door to go out for groceries. Lying on my doorstep was a pile of poop. A piece of paper was taped to the ground beside it that read, "Do it again and you'll get more than dog shit." I don't have the slightest clue who I pissed off, or how. FML

#20455625
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26651) - you deserved it (2729)

On 01/12/2013 at 5:02pm - misc - by fucking mafia or what?? (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I came out to my parents. They laughed in my face. FML

#20445704
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21329) - you deserved it (5158)

On 01/07/2013 at 1:09am - misc - by areyoukiddingme (woman) - United States

Today, my dad made a voodoo doll out of a melon. This seems to happen a lot. FML

#20449532
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16625) - you deserved it (1698)

On 01/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous - Israel

Today, at work, a little girl came in and asked if we had any dance clothes. As I showed her, I asked if she was in a competition. When she said yes, I crossed my fingers and told her I hoped she would win. Unfortunately, I didn't cross them properly and I accidentally gave her the finger. FML

#20449665
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9523) - you deserved it (26000)

On 01/09/2013 at 5:42am - work - by georgiamarshall_ - Australia (New South Wales)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I realized I'm so lonely that I get comfort from hearing my neighbor snore through my apartment wall. FML

#20456567
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22321) - you deserved it (2661)

On 01/13/2013 at 2:24am - love - by LilRedRiding_27 - United States (California)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was at the doctor's for a regular check-up. When my appointment was over and I was about to walk out, she yelled across the room in front of everyone, "Oh and if you could lose some weight, that'd be great." FML

#20462226
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25558) - you deserved it (4692)

On 01/16/2013 at 5:48am - health - by ChubbyButt (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a four-year-old said a word that I didn't know the meaning of. I had to look up the definition. FML

#20465228
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12391) - you deserved it (28357)

On 01/17/2013 at 9:31pm - kids - by walkingdictionary - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while at work, a Beatles song came on the radio. I jokingly said, "These guys are pretty good, are they new?" Everyone thought I was being serious, and now they're convinced I'm an idiot. FML

#20446711
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12814) - you deserved it (22639)

On 01/07/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by EffUrEll - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me at my grandma's funeral. FML

#20452848
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37446) - you deserved it (2160)

On 01/10/2013 at 11:06pm - love - by good job bf (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while making dinner I cut my finger badly with a knife. When I yelled for my dad to drive me to the hospital, he accused me of lying to get attention. He had to taste my blood before he decided it wasn't red-colored corn syrup. FML

#20458321
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29616) - you deserved it (2639)

On 01/14/2013 at 12:52am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)



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